Strings attached...
Should there be strings attached when it comes to relationships? Or certain expectations? I understand that some have their beliefs. I'm talking about...let's say unrealistic. Or makes you wonder.This lady at work tells me things that that I should be doing. Some things I wouldn't do. She at times has made me question myself. Or even second guessing myself. But I don't listen to her. I know what's right for me.
She's told me & others things that maske us look at her in a different light...not always good. I look at her & I'm amazed that she's not single. She's married but doesn't act as tho she is. And she uses him.
She's a big flirt & accepts gifts from other men. She expects her husband to take her out & buy her expensive things. When he buys her stuff, she must be there. Its like what she has is not enough.
She told me one day....you know you should always try to get something out of a guy when you sleep with him. You should get paid for your services. News flash I'm not selling my body.
If I want something nice I can buy it myself. If he chooses to buy me something nice, its his choice. I don't demand it or expect a payout. Sleeping with him is a perk of the relationship. I rather receive something because he wants to not because I told him to.
My point is.....if we have strings attached when it comes to certain things, does it make us puppets? If you don't do "this or that" I'll cut the strings to "certain perks"? Would you withhold affection (or....) to get something? Or what you want?
Comments (20)
There are just some things I wouldn't do to keep a man. And I don't expect. A man to buy my love.
and I was right!!!
You heard from her but that doesn't mean you have to listen and to do things that she has done. You have your own life style and keep it up with you
Over the ages women have always withheld certain "privileges" to men to achieve what ever it is they desire, likewise these privileges have been withheld whenever a woman feels she has been hard done by or upset by a comment......
Blackmail is what it amounts too.
We all need to do that.
Parti....yo-yos
ED.....I usually try to igmore her "monsense advice" but I work with her...so not always possible. Some other stuff she says, its in one ear & out the other. I know what I want & don't want & what I won't do.
There's just some things $ can't buy!
I wouldn't want a guy to go broke to impress me or prove anything. Having him cook meals is a good feeling....even if he's not an expert. Its the thought & the effort that counts. Sometimes spending time together doesn't have to cost much...if you're creative (cooking together) And when he takes me out, to me that's a special treat .
She said to her.....keep it up & you'll end up like this resident. This resident in her younger years was a big flirt. She was married & had a good life. But she coludnt "keep her dress on". He divorced her & took care of the kids. They want nothing to do with her.Now she's all alone & dying with nibody by her side.
Ps I like diamonds
I'm staying true to who I am. I refuse to settle for less. I refuse to degrade myself to get what I want. If I want something I'll go & get it. And not always expect a man to do so. I don't want him to feel obligated. If he wants to, he can,...not because I told him too, nagged him, or demanded him too.
Relationships are complicated and what is good for the married lady at work with her husband does not translate as good for you and your relationship.
Sometimes I think it is about attitude - I am a valuable person, and I expect to give and receive respect and love. Gifts are sometimes people's way to demonstrate their feelings - and it should be taken that way, maybe.
While you are not selling your body - there is a value to giving your body to someone else. It might be for the "love for the moment or for "happily-ever-after"- and that is where it gets complicated.
I dated a man for 18 years and if I even mention an interest in something - he would get me little gifts - it was his way of demonstrating he listened to me, cared about me and thought about me. I reciprocated.
I grew up here mostly. I enjoy the city. I'm not too crazy about winter. Last year was pretty mild, compared to the year before. I don't know how long you were here...but its changed, a lot of new developments & the city is expnanding.
True every relationship is different, & what works for one doesn't work for the other. We all deserve love & respect, but it should be earned not expected. You can't buy love & respect. Some expect & demand certain things.
There's nothing wrong with buying gifts to show your love. Its nice to get a gift & recipercate, for no reason. Like random little gifts,,,,like flowers or whatever. But some expect expensive gifts on a regular basis.....like as gimme gimme, & won't buy their significant other.
This lady at work....expects expensive gifts from men, when she goes shopping she demand him to buy stuff. She's married also. And after she gets the stuff she sells the stuff after she brags about it. She even stated she's only with her husband because he has money & she likes him as a babysitter for her kids.