when did it stop being fun?
It all sort of crept up on padded paws oozing silently into the room, waiting patiently for me to look up and see the writing being flung at the wall.It's a nasty shock when you realize your doctor does not expect you to win, when they start talking about palliative treatments and pain management because no matter how grounded or pragmatic, we have been brought up to hear doctors as an authority and when they do their Voice of Doom act there is a moment of instinctive belief which splinters the bulwark of your own resolution and you waver.
Then, if you are lucky, you spend some time picking up the pieces and weaving them back together with research and determination. I now own a juicer. I read several somewheres that cancer dislikes an alkaline environment so I am transitioning to alkaline foods, I am going to give those cells the most hostile environment I can create for them. It's not like they are paying rent or anything.
With the traces of my last chemo cycle starting to leave my system I am cleaning my internal house and putting shiny new bricks in place to support my immune system. I don't want to live forever but I refuse to hand over this mind and body that has been lent to me, that I have lived in, loved in, laughed and cried in, these feet that have danced me in and out of trouble, to some rogue cells for their suicidal party that will take me with them. Not happening.
So I am cultivating a taste for cabbage and broccoli juices (pretty awful) and balancing with apple and carrot juices ( palatable) and turning out enough pulp to start a compost heap and I will keep peeing on those little strips until I consistently turn them blue!
The hardest thing for me is accepting that it is okay to have moments of weakness, that it doesn't matter if you falter or waver as long as you come out swinging and keep on moving forward. Besides, I want to be able to give the finger to that wimpy little doctor who has given up on me. And maybe a raspberry too.
Comments (7)
I would love to be there to see you give that doctor the finger - when you do, give him the one from the other hand for me will you
Great to hear from you Dorielle.......
Eat and drink as many alkaline foods as you possibly can and stay positive...
tomorow is another day to prove him wrong
and the day after is another and on and on
a old english saying its not the dog in the fight its the fight in the dog
and not calling you a dog
but you have fight so prove to them you can do it
i wish all the best to you
You know that we are in your corner, gal, because if anyone can do this, you can
Hugs & kisses,
J & D
I knew a man you spent houndreds-thousands of dollars trying to decipher what kind of growth he had on his leg. The Doc was determained to help him any way he could. Than the Doc died and he had to change docs. The new guy found the cause and the solution to all his pain. Cut the leg off!!!!!!! It apparently should have been done from the begining, but what cna you do.
Just remember that the docs are there to help you, and if something seems out of place or you think something may not sound right, you have every right in the worl to question it, and fight for your life. A life which you should be living to it's fullest.
Tip
xx