The Path of Least Resistence
or the path of greatest effort?
(1) I suppose it's natural to want the greatest satisfaction for the least amount of effort... to want to make the best decision with the least amount of thought... to do more in less time... to get something for (nearly) nothing when you can.
(2) It might also be normal to see others making 'least effort' choices and determine to be different from them... to never make a decision rashly or without a minute or more of consideration. There is some satisfaction in feeling that each choice was a smart choice and being ready to explain your decision any time you might need to.
I believe that most people navigate through their lives using option (1). Nearly all decisions are made quickly, with little consideration. I believe these people will give a decision more thought only when someone confronts them about their rapid choice. They put consideration into their relationships and other significant decisions because they are taught that these decisions require it. Even if they don't really put effort into it, they will act like they did. They will tell you they thought about it for a long time.
A small minority will give consideration to every choice. They follow option (2) because they want to be correct more often or they fear making mistakes.
Would you consider yourself to be more like option (1) or more like option (2)? Do you believe you're balanced in your approach? Are you trying to be more like the other option?
For myself: I'm too much like option (2). I've been learning some lessons though and am working towards a better balance. I do believe that life's decisions should require some thought but many things in life are simple and trivial (of little meaning) so it's best to take care of them quickly. Mistakes should not be feared but effort should be applied to avoid those that are difficult to recover from.
Don't reveal anything you don't wish to talk about. I'm just sharing what's on my mind, not looking for anyone to talk about something they aren't comfortable with.
I hope your weekend is going well.
Comments (19)
3. stop and smell the roses
Just a thought.
Wise words, Rich
Happy weekend to you
Further, I see a great deal of my decision making behavior being traced back to one of my gender role models, my mother. I used to want to please my mother more than anyone, and I believe I still subconsciously carry that desire today. My mother used to leave everything until the last moment and be forced into making quick decisions.
I got dizy reading all this with the options, im a bit confused now i don't even know what to say except the truth.
Ohh goj!! shame on me. Ok i think i am one of the person's who not always take the best decisions, but i am able to assuming the risk.
It seems that option (1) people are trying to save time but it seems to be that they are also quick to try to do too much. They give quick attention to a continual stream of activities... and this seems to make them feel satisfied with their hard work and ambition.
Option (2) people do fewer tasks but do each more diligently so also feel they have worked hard and have shown ambition.
Unless they find better balance... and follow your advice and stop to smell the roses.
That's the point of my blog... I'm finding my own balance point once again. I need to use option (1) more and use the newly available time for discovering more joy in life... to simply exist with few decisions to be made... to simply appreciate the moment and space I am in.
Fear of mistakes ... and always being prepared to explain my decisions. These are traits I learned as a child and have always carried with me. It took a long time to understand this about myself but now that I see it clearly, I'm working on balancing this better.
Our parents influence us in many ways. At some point we come to understand that they are just as flawed as we are and we realize they just did what they felt was right... for them and for us.
There is a time when we see this... and we have a chance to be better examples.
I've met some who make every decision quickly (1)... and they never see themselves as being responsible when errors occur. They seem to believe that they didn't play a role in the mistake... so they never question their approach.
Not every option (1) person is like this but the ones who don't feel any responsibility for mistakes scare me.
It's good when we have awareness about who we are and why we behave the way we do.
Hope you're doing well today.
This can be a deep topic. When you need to make a decision, who stops long enough to consider "should I make a quick decision or take extra time to think about it more?"?
We do what we usually do... whatever that might be.
I've been around too many people who like to complain. That's where my tendencies some from. I'm sensitive enough to be affected by their criticism so I learned to fear making mistakes. This caused me to worry about everything... no matter if it is significant or not.
This amount of worry is stressful and unhealthy (I've learned) so it's been important for me to learn this lesson... to learn where my worries come from and to "let it go".
It's a bit strange... I feel a bit careless/reckless when I make quick decisions, but I also feel relieved to be able to discard a new task quickly. I also need to ignore my impulse to wonder if my decision was a mistake... I need to let that go as well and only deal with it if an actual problem arises.
It's an adjustment for me... I'm learning.
(and it's almost 4 pm ... it'll get dark soon so I'm going out for a walk while there's still some daylight left ...
the more experienced ones get the faster they will be able to make choices. And sometimes We must just follow instincts. Some of the important choices i've made Everything was saying i shouldn't.. but my guts told me i should.. so i did. I have faith in my feelings and they haven't failed me yet.. not in major ways at least and i've learned allot of those experiences even if they didn't have the expected results.
A final tought comes to my mind.. When i lay down waiting for my last breath.. I rather regret things that i have done.. then things i didn't dare to do.
I agree there is something about maturity in this. I think we start to be bothered more by having to do something over again so are more willing to do it right the first time.
When we're young, it seems like time is unlimited. At least that there is more time available whenever we need it. As responsibilities and interests grow, we discover there is a shortage of time in our lives.
So perhaps this is just one of the adjustments this inspires.
Thank you for your thoughts!
You have an interesting outlook on this. Thanks for adding it!
The idea of action over inaction ... that option (2) is almost like procrastination ... a means to delay a decision and at least for a time, to choose 'inaction'.
Some people look at it this way... that taking time to consider options and consequences is wasted time. Some of it probably is... but making a quick decision that has to be corrected later also wastes time and energy.
I'm trying to look at the value of time in terms of happiness. If it contributes to my long-term happiness, it's time well spent. This might mean time spent talking to a neighbor, time spent doing a crossword puzzle, ... anything that contributes positively in the long term. (it's not about treating myself to ice cream, which only brings enjoyment for a short time, without any long term positive effect ... you probably see what I mean).
Action is good ... I'm learning to appreciate the things that don't feel as productive though... the calming effect of going for a walk... things like this.
You'll have to let me know if I'm understanding you correctly.
Emotion tends to exaggerate events... they tend to add a critique, to add worry/concern, to emphasize how I feel over what actually occurred. They distort reality in some way.
If you can look calmly (almost passively) at events, you can have an appropriate response to them. You can learn and react in ways that might be needed without adding unnecessary burdens to your mind.
Am I on target?
(1) liners. Yup.
"...to look at everything without feeding it energy"
"To direct one's self into what you desire...you focus on it like a laser beam.....without attachment to outcome."
To be an impartial observer... perhaps this goes with your thoughts.
There are different ways to imagine this. To experience a place and time without being a part of it allows you to keep it outside of yourself... to not feel effects from it.
You sound uncertain.