What to do?
I've been thinking recently & debating about something. Its new to me, I haven't been in this situation before. I'm excited but yet at the same time so many thoughts at the same time. I'm not sure if its doubt or being nervous or something.Me & my boyfriend I met from CS are planning on moving in together. He wants me to move into his place. In some ways I don't want too. Its not as tho I don't want to live with him....I do! The problem for me is location. The problem for him is his mortgage will be finished in 3yrs
It would be nice if we had our own place....our first place together. If we stay at his place I won't feel as tho its ours...but his. He lives in a small town & I live in the city. At the moment I don't have a vehicle & there's no public transportation where he lives. But where I live there is.
So if we decide to live there, I would feel isolated, & that I'm losing my freedom & independence....in a way. I don't want to rely on him for transportation & being close to public transportation will help me get around. Plus it'll be hard for me to work if can't get around.
I've asked around & someone mentioned that its possible to carry your mortgage when you decide to move before the mortgage is up. And you can use it for or combine it towards a new place. Not sure of all the details tho... I (we) have to look into it & see the options.
If I live there I would have to change my job....I have no problem doing that since I'm ready for a change. It would be nice to have a Monday to Friday job with wknds off. I work evenings & wknds at the moment. He works days & every wknd off.
At the moment I've voiced some of my concerns, but he's away at work. So when he comes back, we can discuss it more. But I feel so many things all at once. I'm excited, nervous, confused alittle. But I don't want to feel I'm making a mistake. I don't want to wait until his mortgage is paid off before we move in together.
We both should make compromises, but I'm feeling like I am & he's not. Its a big step for us. And I'm ready but.... I haven't lived with a guy before...this is new to me. Lol :) When two move in together...should it matter where they live? Who moves where? Should they start from scratch & find a place together?
Any advice/suggestions/ideas?
Comments (30)
Virgo...I've looked under his bed....I haven't seen any drunken women there!
'I'd feel like living in his place not mine etc etc'
ermm... it will be as u said for all practical purposes but it definitely ain't a good attitude assuming u n him r planning to get married one day (said that cause u do sound to me the type to make that mistake). Anyhow, if it is a serious thing, u guys should have the 'ours' attitude rather than the 'his' and 'mine' one.
Anyway i wish you all the best in your decision.
Take your time and think then, I am probably not the best to give any advice regarding this matter :) and I am sure you will choose the best for yourself, I remember you as being a wise and smart person
ZWEET I AM ALSO THINKING OF A BIG MOVE NOT WITH SOMEONE BUT AWAY AND ITS HUGE DECISION AND I AM SO CONFUSED TOO SO I SHARE YOUR PAIN
I can still see my friends & family, but not as much as I would like. It will be an adjustment for me, as its new for me. There are things that still need to be worked out, but in time it will. I'll keep ya posted.