ready for boarding
Well, this is my third blog and I hope I don´t offend anybody, as I am writing rather selfish. It´s monday morning, day one after a broken relationship (if it was at all) and reading blogs of other CS members doesn´t help. sorry, don´t want to offend, just think there are light years between your ideas and my concerns. The FAQ did not help, so I decided to write by myself. Well, I am okay, it´s humour not sarcasm.Things worked out very well between me and my new online acquaittance. We wrote letters, had chat and finally met, to spend our holidays together. Everything was fine and in my case it was just a matter of time untill we would discuss more seriously about taking the next step to create a long-distance relationship. Therefor I invited her to my home and she was happy, even showed me booking confirmation only a few days later. Her life took some radical changes, as she was always career orientated, and therefor took the opportunity to accept a job she was offered. This is what I would like to call the intervention of a third party into our relation. Since that time her concern was only about that job. Before she told me it´s for 6 months - I supported her. Later she told me it will last for minimum 3 years. Asking her - where is my place in your life now? Not getting an answer. - Been asked: we could postpone holidays if you don´t feel comfortable. I replied: well, I invited you. It depends on you. Take invitation if you feel comfortable. She promised to take invitation. Two days before scheduled flight she informed - job issues. Needs to leave for some reasons. Her feeling sorry, feeling sad. Same with me. I did not reply message. Waiting 3 days. Felt better. Asking if she was successful. Discussing all personal issues with her. Finally made my decission: to stop this unhealthy relation.
I read article on CS how to end relationship. So I took the advice given there, thanked her for the good times we spend and wished her good luck for professional and personal life- putting this together in an email.
And she replied, unable to formulate any clear idea. Not thankful, only accussing me, blaming me for everything, stating her superiority. I am thankful to have loyal friends. So it doesn´t bother me any longer.
For you, my readers. Take this one advice: if a person (male or female) thinks success in job makes her/him a better person, then it´s time to part ways, before you sell the last part of your dignity to this business shark.
Comments (12)
From what you have stated it would seem that there wasn't much of an intent,maybe just another holiday! Would she have moved permanently ?Who knows.
Then again we haven't heard her version of events.
In some ways you are right that we all have our own selfish concerns. I am very Sorry for your Breakup but it seems that she really kept you on the Last step of her life
Not everyone has the financial security not to have work, for most people it is as an essential part of their lives - bills have to be paid, if we like it or not. Speaking from experience, if you have a new job and are ask to travel you can't refuse.
Having a job is a necessary evil for most people and your last sentence just shows your bitterness.
I believe that based on your needs you should have ended the relationship.
What I can't agree with is a woman's accusations, or a man's justifications that he was right about everything. This relationship simply didn't work. You have the choice to walk away gracefully, smile and remember whatever the good times were for you.
Hm, it´s better not to end up making accusations towards the other or look for justification for the own decission. I made a decission, it was inevitable.