Drive-Through ATM Machines
With the growing popularity of drive-through ATMs I thought it wise to include the procedures to use such machines. As with toilets and everything else, the procedure to follow is different for males and females.
We’ll start with the males. The ladies are welcome to read it as well.
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MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
Ok, then here is the female procedure. It is not recommended for men to read this in the company of women.
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FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
Ok, so there you have it. No need to cause unnecessary delays at the ATM any more.
No, this is not my work. I received it from a lady friend not so long ago. Don't hunt me down, I'm just the messenger.
Have a great day out there.
Comments (50)
And that folks, is how you go thru an ATM driveup.
I needed a bit of support here. I have been on a lone crusade. Even if it came from another unreal man. I believe we pensioners are not real because we are not at work.
Yes, I found it extremely funny when I received it. Funny thing is this is so typical my first wife and completely unlike the second. She drove like a man and thought like a man. And strangely enough, preferred to use the pickup iso the car.
Here is actually the procedure..
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Call your husband/partner/male friend to get the cash for you.
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Pick up the phone from your wife/partner/female friend if she calls.
2. Drive up to the cash machine.
3. Put down your car window.
4. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
5. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
6. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
7. Put window up.
8. Drive off.
9. Give the money to your wife/partner/female friend
10. Off to work.
See.. women can always make things simpler..
If you still have your ticket stubs I will refund it.
I can imagine the consternation if a woman's was to tell me to put the seat down after using the toilet.
Nope, you have just complicated it. It is 3 steps backwards from 7 to 10 steps. Certainly does not apply to me. As it is at the present I don't report to anybody and when I was married I did not touch the finances.
I prefer plastic money, make use of on-line and mobile banking and seldom use a auto teller. Maybe twice or thrice a month.