Help! How do Men think?
I've always wanted to write a blog to express these pent up thoughts. Today, is my first time posting a blog, so I may be a little rusty around the edges at first.There was a movie called "Think like a Man act like a Woman", now when this was scheduled for release at the time I was extremely happy. 'My prayers have been answered' I thought
At the end I soon realized that the same information I had known before about men, is the same I knew after. Sprinting rapidly in my mid-thirties and still I have yet to figure out how men think. What do men ideally want? Do most just want the physical 'enjoyment' life has to offer or is there a deeper need?
I applaud most women, who decide to be single for the rest of their natural lives. However, unfortunately, I'm not that brave. When the thunder cracks and the lightning flashes, it would be quite soothing not to be single at these times.
Help is urgently needed, how do men think? Is it specific to cultures and age? Maybe other women ask themselves these question. I really hope I'm not alone on this.
- Canday
Comments (43)
And they bond just as we do
You just gotta remember to pay attention to people's actions....not their words...
Yes, indeed they are all different. I just wish I had a book with guides on how each one differs
You brought up an interesting point ''they bond just as we do" and not too sure about that. Male and female bond slight different don't you think? I'm not an expert on male bonding, maybe I should be more keen in finding out.
As to paying attention to action and not words, there are a few Oscar winners among men.
Quite some efforts have been made in Braking up the unity and strength of the family , not something I`d applauded to
Devovix, I'd to respond to your comments about breaking up a family? Who is advocating that? I'm very curious to know wow
Candy don`t pay too much attention to my flapdoodle, lost in space comments... Im a tinfoil hat conspiracy theorist...
So, what have I learnt so far...
1. All men are different (watch their actions not their words)
2. To listen to them is to understand
3. They have interesting sense of humours
Wishing to add more points to the list above
The book(s) exist. Try, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. Written by a woman it gets some things wrong, but at least it heads in the correct direction.
That is over simified. But he's not wrong. If we are forced to think of other things, the basic motivation to do so is those two things.
You're not the first woman I've known who intended to write such a book. I passed along to her the same bit of onfo. Possibly the best, most "get to the point" input she received.
Don't try to make this more complicated than it is. We're actually not very complex beings.
For example... You did ask "what do men really want" if you clarified this by saying... "what do men really want from a relationship" You may get some answers to your question.
Unfortunately, I have a summarized version of those books of the Bible and
“Men are from …. Women are from…” Guilty as charge, haven’t read. Now, you see my dilemma :-)
I must say though, I prefer knowledge in a more interactive setting :-) (straight from the source)
me naked so soon. So, stick to simple and ignore complexity got it…
What about playing a damsel in distress vs a dominant know what she wants women? Who wins?
about relationships. And I believe how a person general think is a pattern of how they
similarly behave towards many aspects of their lives. Each response is different and it reflects
how men think in different ways…. I’m enjoying reading this :-)
You should have said this to me before I started writing this blog…But it’s never too late. At least you have confirmed! Thanks :D
The only way to understand each other is to learn from each other and meet in the middle
Not sure if that was a rational or an emotional answer
"is there a deeper need?"
yes age and culture plays a role but trivial.
Actually the biggest problem is what you specifically seems to be desirous of, is a scarcity....excuse me, my perception...
Yes. You may want to try damsel-in-distress. VERY effective. Discounts on tires. Assistance from policemen. Getting fish hook baited. Getting married. My daughter is a Grand Master at this technique...And has employed it with outstanding results in all the situations mentioned.
Daughter has a maiden aunt. ..Auntie is in utter awe of daughter.
Of course, growing up, she had two subjects on which to perfect her artistry...me and her grandpa. She's our family's first girl since we'd arrived in this country 100 years previously. We were putty in her hands!
isn’t possible to mix it up a bit. i.e. “enjoyment plus deeper need” I don’t believe in a fairytale knight
and shinning amour, because there is no perfect being on this planet. I strongly believe that common interests and goals do/should play a factor in a proper connection.
Scarcity, maybe you are right who knows ;-)
I’m usually very direct and that seems to scare men away. So, what you are saying is that men need to feel the need to protect as all times.
No more changing my own tyres! By the way, what are tyres? Damsel-in-distress mode here I come
Other than that, I gave up trying to figure out what men in general want. If someone interests me, I try to talk to him (yeah, that always works great
If you want to have someone when the lightning flashes, I think listening to him, having fun and always keep sex going is something that might help.
but you are absolutely right. I recently indicated to a very attractive man that I’m more of a
traditional type of lady. He thought I didn’t find him attractive because I didn’t allow him to play
in my ‘rose garden’ after eight hours! Needless to say, he moved on to another ‘rose garden’.
What I do find is, the more you ignore them the more the chase after you.
Summary: listen to them, have fun and ‘validate’, so that someone is there through the lightning flashes.
I could be wrong here but from past experiences, I think men secretly want a subservient partner.
I actually don't mind being one but my partner must not abuse his 'status'. Strange that I have this tendency to be the submissive one coz both my maternal grandma and non are not that, oohhhh far far from that!
To be submissive, a strong degree of trust has to be involved between the couple.
I must admit being submissive doesn’t sound too bad, on the contrary a relationship should be about giving and taking. In conclusion, I’d say that I don’t mind the man leading, however I won’t tolerate being led astray.
Re your grandma, it sounds like she grew up during the time when feminism came about. The
bottomline is we all can’t be the same. Diversity is the spice of life.
About the "you mean what you say": fairly typical for people who grew up in Germany, I am the same but don't observe this behaviour where I am currently. I get a "I didn't think you actually meant this serious"