A Death Threat.

I’m in grave trouble. Some guy is threatening to shoot me or run me over with his car. I’m soiling my underpants with fear. I’m too scared to leave the house.hole

I received a hand-delivered note in my mailbox yesterday informing me that the writer will kill me if I shag his wife again.uh oh

The solution is simple enough; just lay off her, but who do I cut out of my busy schedule? The guy did not tell me who his wife is and never put his name on the note.dunno

How inconsiderate of him!frustrated
cats meow cats meow

I hope there is no blue in your Monday.wave
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Comments (66)

Maybe you should stay celibate once and for all? tongue
Hi DC
I'm getting old and must enjoy what is left of it.
laugh rolling on the floor laughing
Cat, what have you done again? confused
One can"t leave you alone for ONE weekend!! doh doh cool laugh
Hi Calleis,
You know how it is, men will always remain men.laugh
hug wine
Cat you devil How many more letters with names you need to receive to figure out her who he is referring to.doh Make sure you stay under the bed for the rest of the day.laugh hug
hello my sweetheartkiss lips hug bouquet (sorry honey...for the delay in commenting)
Hi Usha
I don't understand it. I'm doing nothing wrong. Fust having a bit of fun.laugh
hug wine
Hi Teena,
Are you neglecting me? That won't do.scold
laugh rolling on the floor laughing

Can it be your husband who sent the note?rolling on the floor laughing
hug wine
Please will you leave me your house in your will. I'll promise to put a selection of flowers on your gravestone if you do.
it could be...you know....laugh (that invisible rat)laugh
Hi Calleis,
Don't remind me of that. I feel rotten enough as it is.doh
laugh rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Sol
You don't want this house. It still requires a lot of work. I'll leave it as punishment to whoever wrote the note.rolling on the floor laughing
cheers wave
Teena
Now that you mention it, it could not have been him. The note would have been invisible too.laugh
grin wine
Sorry, Cat! Calm down! Just stay in your pants, close all windows and doors! And wait until the storm is over..cheering
Calleis,
I never wait for storms to pass. I love dancing in the rain.laugh
wine hug
Here is the solution... Put the note in the next door neighbor's mailbox, let him solve the problem for you.
Sol
Noooo!

If his wife gets to the note first, he'll be dead before he can solve anything.doh
grin wine
This was hilarious!!rolling on the floor laughing

Perfect way to start off my week!!
Hi Cattie, despicable as he is, my ex-husband won't go down so low. That puts me in the clear.cheering
Does S. Africa allow you to carry a Glock or a Sig? I used to get about 8 death threats a year (usually over more serious stuff). Fortunately none of them from competent individuals. IME 70% - 85% of the time it is just someone venting steam. The others? You do what you have to do. Sometimes a first strike is a good option. What'd the local PD say?
Also of course, the guy needs to realize, you aren't the problem. His problem is the wife's attitude to the relationship. If not you, then she would do someone else. He needs to just walk away.
Sorry for taking so long to respond, but scared as I am, I had to brave this unknown villain. I had no fresh bread in the house.
laugh rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Minerva,
I', so sorry, my love.blushing

but how do you manage to catch me red handed every time? Are you spying on me?hole
grin hug wine
Hi Maria
Don't laugh at a poor fella in dire stress. Pray for me.
laugh rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Bea
So you can go back on the list. See you at the usual time and place.grin

But I did not know you still have such a lot of high opinion about your ex.laugh
hug wave
Hi Ken,
Yes, I have a licensed fire arm but hopefully it will not get to that. It is very unlikely that I will get up to mischief with a married woman.

I must admit to trying it once but it was a lonely life. I only got to see her when she wanted and on the important days I was alone because she spent them with her husband and family.doh

I'm only mocking with a comical situation.rolling on the floor laughing
cheers wave
Hi Catfoot..
I am sorry to hear about what happened. You be careful there ok! Next time you get another threat, please call Sherlock Holmes. I am sure he can find whoever send that threat. Then you call Larry Holmes. I am sure he can knock the threat sender out. But please, don't call Katie Holmes. I am sure she would not pick up your call.

grin
Put up a note on your mailbox with "Which wife?" dunno
Bob
roll eyes Maybe! You should move. Again!
Hi Kal
It sounds like good advice. I'll bear it in mind.thumbs up
hug wave
Hey Jim
I'm a lover, not a fighter.laugh

Those wishing to fight must join the army.grin
cheers wine
Hi KN
Noooo! What will the neighbors think?rolling on the floor laughing
hug wave
Hi Angel.
I'm comfortable here. If only I knew his identity I could get him laid by his wife to pacify him but no names are forthcoming.laugh
hug wine
Put it up late at night and get the note off before the neighbours wake up. laugh
KN
You obviously don't know my neighbors. They make turn to man the windows. We (South Africans) are inquisitive people.rolling on the floor laughing
hug wave
None of my neighbours knows me - quite handy methinks. grin
Hi KN
This is the disadvantage of living in a quiet part of town. Everybody around me are retired and nobody knows what to do with themselves.doh
laugh rolling on the floor laughing
Cat, I figured you were, but was just covering the bases.
I second Solamente's solution. Stuff it in the neighbor's box. Problem solved laugh
cat
That is a conundrum...perhaps the parrot squawked?...

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Catfoot

Catfoot

Around here, Western Cape, South Africa

I know I cannot always have what I want, but that does not make me want it less. Otherwise I’m easy to please, flexible, accommodating and forgiving. I cool down as fast what I get cross. I hate it when people lie to me. I’m hooked to my laptop, but [read more]

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created Jun 2015
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