In The Dog Box Again
I like children but only if they have good manners. Last Sunday I put my foot into it again. I should rather have put it in my mouth.
My sister’s daughter and her husband relocated to Gauteng recently and, not to disrupt the children (aged nine and ten), they decided to leave them with their grandmother (my sister) until the end of the school year. For some reason my niece and her husband believe that good manners start and end with ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ while ignoring minor details like respect for adults and especially older people.
My father (88) asked the boy (9) to fetch a glass of water. He decided to ignore my father. When my father asked him a second time he laughed at my father, stuck his tongue out and walked out the house onto the veranda. That was when this Catfoot lost his cool and told him that I have peace about the way he talks to his own father but he is not going to treat my father, who is his great-grandfather, like that.
Of course, he complained about it to his father when he called later in the evening, and it turned into an unpleasant exchange of words with his father. I have never reacted well to threats and told him to take a few days off from work to download and install some good manners in his children. My father and my brother-in-law think I deserve a medal, but my sister is not too happy with me. As I said, I like children but only if they have good manners.
A wonderful day to you all.
Comments (47)
I agree, it's more than your usual 'P's and 'Q's.
When my kids were younger, I never allow them to join into adult's conversation. I'd tell them very sternly, when the adults are talking, DO NOT sit/remain in the same room and listen to their conversation unless being told to.
We had help until the kids entered primary school. Sue, the helper would do most of the house chores. One fine afternoon, I overheard my son who was only 5 years-old then, demanded water to be brought to him while he was watching the telly. Sue immediately stood up but I stopped her. Instead, I turned to my son, gave him my infamous murderous look and requested him to fetch the glass of water himself
Too many other incidents but as a stay-at-home mom, I managed to rectify a lot of 'ghastly situations'
Oh! One more thing, kid's behaviour is a reflection of their upbringing. The Chinese has this saying when any kids misbehaved, "The home never teaches" ( loosely translated from Cantonese ) meaning, good manners begin at home or something to that effect!
I demand to know who this secret beau is or else...
That is exactly what I'm talking about. These little brats will sit in adult company, chip into the conversation and even try to correct adults when they talk. Or they will turn the TV so loud that we cannot hear each other; this while the have a TV in their bedroom.
And my sister is too scared to open her mouth lest they go sulking and complaining to their parents.
It was about time somebody told them they have no manners. I was invited there for supper tonight but I have not heard from my sister since my chatty watty with their father and I don't even know if I'm still welcome.
Ah, it better be so. I was all up in arms, packing my suicase to come and sort this matter. I was not going to take prisoners, believe me.
If one stays polite infront of them, they will also develop this behavior, maybe in a later time.
I hear what you say but they are not going to treat my father with such disrespect until such time. Neither my sister nor I treat him like that and and they won't either.
No, it will not die out. But if you believe that respect to adults is an outlived concept, you are welcome to your view. Your comment explains a lot.
Quite so. And it also explains the lack of respect some people displays on the blogs.
If children misbehave in my home, I will first look to the parents to correct them and if that does not work, I will make it very clear that it is my home and my rules. I don't care if they run to their parents complaining. At least they get the message.
I have been a child minder in the past and the parents have been very impressed with how their children have responded to being taught respect. Shame that they can't do it themselves.
I have this notion that if you discipline and bend your child in the right direction while still small, the rod becomes unnecessary. You have six or seven years to form the child and from there you're in for a torrid time if you failed the first part.
The sad thing here is that Calleis is correct in her assumption. My niece married into an family with slightly different values than what we have. I have seen one or two arguments (and heard of a few more) between their father and his parents. It's mindboggling.
The bible says in Proverbs 22:6
"Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it."
We see it every day where children have their way and turn out to be "bad characters" down the line! JMO
I guess he figured since his late father and I used the words it was the polite thing to do.
27 minutes ago
Calleis
Quite so. And it also explains the lack of respect some people displays on the blogs.
Gee how did I miss this above.
I show respect for people in the blogs up until they give me a reason not to.Then I stay clear of them.
How this went from the two children to the blogs I'll never know.
A true piece of wisdom. I have retained the values that my parents taught me and I have passed it on to my children. Well, I probably failed somewhere because my children did not pass all of it onto their children.
But then my parents did not instruct me to pass it on to my children; I just did it because I thought it was the right thing. I wonder where I went wrong. Or maybe I just did not keep up with times, but I'd rather be old-fashioned before giving up the values that I was brought up with.
My grandparents, my parents set the example for me. I taught my children respect for others and to this day they have held onto those values. I have 7 grandchildren and they are all very respectful to their parents and grandparents!
I agree with Pieceacake's comment that to many parents leave the child rearing to the schools. WHAT A TERRIBLE MISTAKE!
Good blog.
You said it all. I know of two cases where preschool children were sent home not to return because of their bad manners and in one case the mother actually commented that she expected the preschool teacher to teach her child decent manners because she does not have the time or the patience.
Easy to explain this one CC,
Unprovoked rude comments much more than likely started with childhood.
You are blessed indeed to have 7 grandchildren. I only have one grandson(18) and one granddaughter(1) and there will be no more.
Wow, what is happening in Greece that requires the presence of the British army? I must really catch up with the news.
I totally agree with you. It is essential to teach children manners and respect. If they are not taught these things they grow up selfish and self-centered thinking the world revolves around them. I would be mortified if my children spoke to anyone with disrespect. I have seen a lot of disrespectful young people and I am shocked every time I see it. Why did the parents not teach them the proper way to behave? Why are there so many rude disrespectful people in this world?
I don't regret shutting him up but I did expect a little more support from my sister. Actually, I feel that as she is in charge of the lad at the present, she should have cut his wire before it became my plight.
Thanks, I'm really inquisitive now.
Apparently some people think respect is an out-lived pre-20th century concept that no longer have a place in modern society. Thankfully they appear to be in the minority.
But I think some people have to deal with worse.
Be glad you didn't have to deal her.
Many of my friends here feel just the same. Funny generations we have in front of us, good job we are indendant people
Well, no funny vibes and nothing has been said about the whole affair. I just wonder if my dad and my brother-in-law did something behind the scenes. I even had a second helping of spaghetti bolognaise.
I cannot get it to play, we have bad weather at the moment. Rain and a bit of wind. I shall try to look later.
That is the reason why I did not take the grannt flat that my daugter has on offer. But the situation had been neatly defused and the family bonds are strong as ever. I suspect my father had a hand in it. I wonder what will happen to the family when he dies. He has such large shoes. I don't think I could fill it.
Glad everything is seeming to smooth out for you!
Same here. I don't know why my sister got uptight about it. After all, my father is her father as well.