When a lover becomes a brother
Not all relationships end badly, in some cases following a relationship a deep friendship ensues that in many ways can be more worthwhile than the relationship ever was.Have you ever had a relationship that bombed, yet afterwards, found you could confide in your “ex”, ask for help and advice, tell all your worries too whilst knowing you are not going to be criticized or made to feel vulnerable?
Comments (19)
I got on very well with their moms and sisters and they'd always blamed their son/brother in the event of parting ways.
It was breathtaking, bewildering, exciting, maddening and intoxicating .. I was exhausted when I ended it.
Some years passed before our paths crossed again, we each had lovers at the time which for me was a kind of safety net - I was never going back there again but was able to enjoy and appreciate the deep connection we both shared, his insights and unfailing ability to pinpoint the causes of my varying states of discomfort and angst, sharing my happiness and excitement at other times.
His roller-coaster life ended three years ago, he was only 47 and I guess he was exhausted also.
I miss him and think of him often.
Jubba never say never
As Serene says:
"I had a 4 year on/off, roller-coaster ride of a relationship with a man back in my early forties.
It was breathtaking, bewildering, exciting, maddening and intoxicating .. I was exhausted when I ended it."
In my case it was almost 3 years ago and our paths crossed again a couple of weeks ago.
Apparently he has just ended a platonic relationship and would like to make up with me but... I have moved on since my illness (after the break up) and my accident last year, and I don´t have the feelings and emotional attachment I had for him then.
However, as you say Sola, I feel now he is more like a brother who I can discuss and share things with and we happen to enjoy each other´s company - in small doses.
Life's a funny thing innit
That man nearly drove me mad back in the day, talk about playing with fire - I was almost incinerated
I was a moth to his flame and learned a thing or seven about life, some I could most likely have done without..
But he was the most interesting, insightful, captivating man I've ever known and I'm glad I spent some time in his company in his later, more mellow years.
There was a single red rose in my hand as I said my last goodbye.
Yup, still a friend. Not one of the really close ones, but will always be on the Christmas card list.
We are then friends during the relationship as well as all the additional benefits
And we remain great friends afterwards.