What are you afraid of?

This always completely boggles my mind. Call me impulsive, call me foolish....but alas, I am a gemini and I do tend to act how I feel at any given moment, with how I feel. My emotions are often expressed freely....not sure if that is such a flaw, I guess it all depends on how ya look at it. Anyway....not to distract from the initial topic...

What are men and women afraid of? This seems to be the biggest issue in dating on my end. Why must a couple start off as friends first? What is this etiquette in dating to "wait" for this or it's "too soon" for that...funny thing is, divorce rate is higher these days than it ever has been and many years ago, romance and chivalry ruled relationships and things weren't always over-analyzed like they are today. People fell in love without worrying about which steps to take when in the relationship...they used their hearts rather than racking the brains....and then, in staying together, they actually resisted the impulse to jump ship when things got rocky.

What are you afraid of....commitment? Getting hurt? fear of the thoughts of another of you? What's the big deal.....if the connection is there, it's there...why over-analyze....if it's not broke, don't fix it. Men (not all) want to have sex within the first few days but then say it's too soon for feelings.....well...but it's not too soon to give you everything physically? And this is why I don't get involved physically unless I'm in a relationship ....some will say anything just to get the physical gratification but when it comes to any kind of feeling or commitment, they start shaking in their shoes. What's wrong with people? Or is is me? If it is, then so be it....This is me lol....


...just off the top of my head so please excuse any grammatical errors rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing wink
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Comments (48)

Falling asleep under a physically challange woman .makes me wake screaming in a cold sweat

crying
Blue....physically challenged may mean many different things.....having some strange dreams then...no icecream before bed at night scold roll eyes rolling on the floor laughing
I think it's the equal rights movement. It has really back-fired on women. Men now feel empowered and they want the right to express their inner feelings for polygamy.
RC.....they just want their cake and eat it too, so to speak...not surprising. .....to keep all their options open because heaven forbid they get stuck with just one toy they'll get bored with in a few weeks doh roll eyes
Enigma

The only fear I have is of not getting a visa to travelhead banger
That was good, IMB!!laugh
That was good, IMB!!laugh
im....better get on that then, time's a-wastin professor laugh wave
Hi, I'm an Gemini as well, finding myself apologizing for typos after an email is sent as opposed to proof reading first, if that is what you did.
I don't really want to comment about your post is simply there are speed of sound hookups out there, here, and everywhere, just let others deal with what they do within their own comfort zones. To judge is not to understand.

Regards and good speed dating....
"Call me impulsive, call me foolish....but alas, I am a gemini ..."

Sometimes I feel as if all you folk on here have colluded against logic/rationale .... sigh
Die, you know I always have your back when it comes to logichandshake
Spirit, fellow Gemini wave ...Not going to judge them, people have a choice to live and date the way they do...it just gets frustrating when they cross your path and attempt to pursue in that manner....they're not getting anywhere lol ...trust comes with time...along with everything else
@rc

bull aside... I'm getting the feeling that the vast majority of people from all walks of life actually DO believe in this absurdity. It's crazy in this day n age... frustrated
Die, they'd still be burning witches at the stake and praying to Gods in the sky if no one stopped them. blues
Rock

Thanks mate

Wazzup?

Enigma

I am sure another fear obsticle will come after I 9ver cone the mentioned one!wink
Im....don't be such a chicken crazy giggle
Hi Enigma wave
Fear kills senses. We may develop mental obstacles in situations that normally are not dangerous or with problems. Few things paralyze us stronger than fear. No one remained untouched by it, even the bravest warriors in history. The difference between normal people and those who seem fearless is that the latter have learned to control their fear, they use it to their advantage , they turn it into power.
As you said....Que sera sera hug bouquet

@ Enigma

Do you know how to the "Bristol Stomp" dance?

The kids at Bristol are sharp as a pistol when they do the Bristol stomp. A song from the 60's.
Enigma

Look at the presidency campaign usa.help

doh frustrated wink
Florence....nothing to fear but fear itself. wink wave
It depends, Tepid....not sure if I know of a Bristol Stomp here....maybe it originates from Bristol, NY...or Bristol, TN...or maybe Bristol, MA...Bristol, RI....Bristol, WI....lol I could go on rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Im that would probably be your next fear in obtaining that visa doh rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Enigma thumbs up
Exactly, I'm afraid only of myself sigh
Florence..don't let fear get the best of ya comfort wave
I'm a Taurus, but not into astrology, so might be misreading this.laugh

But are you saying firstly that we are overthinking things, and should just go with the flow - physically as well as otherwise


And then saying that we shouldn't go with the flow without guaranteed commitment?

<<<The taurean bull in the China shoplaugh
1to1, I agree 100% ...certainly disheartening to see how some of the most precious times in life have become meaningless and the people replaceable blues
I think being afraid of things like commitment etc. comes with age and experiences made.

Things were easy and just a given when I was young. We assumed things would go their way as planned and there will eventually be a happily ever after.

I became single in my mid-thirties and was in for a major surprise - suddenly I met guys with baggage that either don't want or can't have a relationship. But there are tons of guys that have no problems with climbing up on anything with a pulse (with some I'm not even sure about the pulse requirement).

There is no point in trying to change (or even trying to understand) imo. I know what I want and what I need to be with someone. The only possibility for me is to have a partner that actually WANTS to have a relationship, still be there when we're both old and grey, full fill EACH others wants, needs and desires...

There are not a ton of people that are compatible out there, but there are a few special ones, so don't give up and I hope you'll find him. wave
Enigma, I think most men do say what they mean, but many women choose not to hear it, or think it will change with time, or because they are so special that the man will change his outlook grin
Yep Molly, you're absolutely right there. wine
KN....I can totally understand that. I want the same as you do. Seems to be a bit too much to ask these days, doesn't it? Yes, they are few and far between, unfortunately. dunno wave
Molly, in some cases, I do agree....but if a man is to say, that he's not interested in having a relationship, I wouldn't even bother pursuing further other than friendship (without benefits laugh )....but you can't deny that there are also plenty of men out there who mislead. I'm sure there are women who do too. popcorn
Enigma, I have rarely been mislead.
But I have been guilty of ignoring or misinterpreting what had been said.
I wouldn't say it is too much to ask for Enigma, it's just that there are simply not many guys that actually want (or can) have someone special to share their life with.

Took me 6 years until I ran into someone that has similar values, standards and wants what I want.. It's not easy as his situation is stressful, but we both want to give it a go and I hope that circumstances and life don't get in the way. But we both want to be with each other.

There are a few good people out there.
Molly, have you ever been to America? rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Calm....that's precisely what I do...I walk away. And believe you, me...I am very strong in mindset. Never been a problem there lol I know what I look for, just silly me would hope that there'd be some kind of insight on human behavior vs animal instincts laugh roll eyes wave
KN... other than my little Egyptian fling of 6 months, it's been about 3 years....yes, I'm sure there are a few good men out there, but I'm thinking they take up maybe about 5% of the American population lol...I'm just glad I raised my boys differently laugh Best wishes though, to you and your loved one...that's pretty awesome thumbs up yay wave
I think 5% would be pretty high... help

Thanks for the good wishes Enigma, much appreciated. They are out there! wine
KN....I really have to laugh at that comment rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing ....only because as I was typing, I actually typed "2%", but then figured nahhh, don't want you to think I've COMPLETELY lost all hope in the male gender, deleted...and entered "5%" instead LOL
laugh

Just don't lose hope Enigma. On another note, if that one would end, I think I'll pack it in. doh
No! lol...if you pack it in then that would mean YOU'RE losing hope laugh you're good lol no worries wink wave
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lllllEnigmalllll

lllllEnigmalllll

Meriden, Connecticut, USA

The dating nightmare... "Let's be friends, just friends. I'm not ready for a relationship but I expect you to do things with me considered inapropriate in terms of a friendship. We're not together, you can't claim me, you can't be with anyone but me. [read more]

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created Aug 2016
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