When Hauggh met Sallhhg
(A caveman love story) (fun only)It was full moon and Sallhhg knew there had to be more to life than the village and picking a good hunter to cook and clean for. She was standing staring at the moon and then
..............................................BAM
For him, it was love at first sight. He clubbed her so gently she saw rainbows, not stars, and he carried her to his cave instead of dragging her by her hair - what a GENT!
It was love for her too, when the rainbows cleared away
she knew it the minute she saw the wealth of furs he had heaped in the sleeping corner. Not stiff sticky ones still spiky with blood, either. Properly cured, soft, warm, hardly smelling at all . . . The moon was full again when he told her she’d have to go back to the village.
“But Hauggh! We do zooby zooms every night, sometime morning! This love!”
“Sallhhg” he said patiently “is been nice, you good good for zooby zooms. But is new moon now. You go.”
“Why?”
“No blood. That show you done, bun in oven, cooking. That mean soon no more zooby zooms, no more happy, nag nag nag. No. Been there. Done that. I make best buns, you lucky girl, but now me must find more ovens, make more buns.”
“But Hauggh! I love!”
So then he sat her down and he patiently explained the whole meaning of life
“World is bakery. Job of young woman is oven, to make buns. Me, Hauggh, master baker. You very good zooby zooms, so you had one whole moon of master baker. If you have bun, you lucky woman. If you not have bun, you defective. If you have very good bun, maybe I bring you back here next year, make more buns? Now go to village - and while you wait for bun, make me a fur for cave, eh? Nice soft one, no smell.”
(aren't we glad we live in modern times?)
Comments (41)
Hire young staff for the actual baking.
however, you are in charge of quality control of incoming ingredients, so you have to test those thoroughly before you pass them on to your staff for bun-making.
I knock one up out of rock
no problemo
Yup, yup, think that could work -
Cheep.
(oh and if you just spoke Chinese to me, er, no, not a word. I teach them English. Not a single word of any Chinese language, me. I know. Shameful.)
societybakery. Hey, this could WORK. For me, anywayI suppose you could also write it as an elephant story, with rogue elephants living outside the herd, but I struggled with Neanderthal language, no idea where to start in elephant whispering.
Ever read the Elephant Whisperer? I cried like a child.
Short-cut to weepie, I think there's a youtube for the elephant herd coming back when the whisperer died. Will go check.
Waiting for students ... Sigh.
Good lullaby. Nearly as good as Sheldon's soft kitty.
Little ball of fur
Happy kitty, sleepy kitty
Purr, purr, purr
Luke, I think there could be a case for pressing the reset button, yes no? Re-starting society?
I agree with Aaltar, see? You can write for kids, and the story can also be turned into an adult store back room private video viewing film too.
But really, it's a good little story. Just trying to figure out what the BUNS are.
That BAM over the head, now that's the way to true love, isn't it?
Thanks, Mol, Just remember that I'm no GENT, I usually keep her conscious so she can walk back the the
bakerycave. Be good and enjoy the week.Lovely, I read the story and i think this could very well be labelled under comprehension.
Yup, I'm a traditional girl me, soft spot for a man with a club
Oh, not the zooby zooms, my pupils are all adults, but the bad English? Kapow!
Hope you got a giggle out of it
Next time, I promise, I will put more than 10 minutes thought into it, I will, and I promise hand on heart to have at least one fairytale element.
unless I can convince anyone I was Sallhhg in a former life? then it would be an interesting experience
Do thoughts in the bath count?
Or does it need to be after the watershed?