When Hauggh met Sallhhg

(A caveman love story) (fun only)

It was full moon and Sallhhg knew there had to be more to life than the village and picking a good hunter to cook and clean for. She was standing staring at the moon and then

..............................................BAM

For him, it was love at first sight. He clubbed her so gently she saw rainbows, not stars, and he carried her to his cave instead of dragging her by her hair - what a GENT!

It was love for her too, when the rainbows cleared away she knew it the minute she saw the wealth of furs he had heaped in the sleeping corner. Not stiff sticky ones still spiky with blood, either. Properly cured, soft, warm, hardly smelling at all . . .

The moon was full again when he told her she’d have to go back to the village.

“But Hauggh! We do zooby zooms every night, sometime morning! This love!”

“Sallhhg” he said patiently “is been nice, you good good for zooby zooms. But is new moon now. You go.”

“Why?”

“No blood. That show you done, bun in oven, cooking. That mean soon no more zooby zooms, no more happy, nag nag nag. No. Been there. Done that. I make best buns, you lucky girl, but now me must find more ovens, make more buns.”

“But Hauggh! I love!”

So then he sat her down and he patiently explained the whole meaning of life

“World is bakery. Job of young woman is oven, to make buns. Me, Hauggh, master baker. You very good zooby zooms, so you had one whole moon of master baker. If you have bun, you lucky woman. If you not have bun, you defective. If you have very good bun, maybe I bring you back here next year, make more buns? Now go to village - and while you wait for bun, make me a fur for cave, eh? Nice soft one, no smell.”

(aren't we glad we live in modern times?)