Gender Equality
Can I tell you ladies a little secret? You had it all along and did not even know it. Have you noticed how few men will still offer their seats to a lady on a full bus or a train these days? Some people may interpret it as bad manners but that’s not true. They are merely acknowledging your equal status. Beware of those who offer their seats; they are the chauvinists who still think that they are superior to women.
If you still feel that you’re being dealt short, maybe we should change genders for a while but please not while you are pregnant or menstruating; that would be unfair.
So while you are me and I am you, see that you shave every morning… and every night before you come to bed. Your beard scratches me. I’M NOT UPSET!!! Brother, am I going to enjoy yelling at you, and my colleagues, and everybody else without having to apologize? This PMS thing is such a handy thingymabob.
Not now; the children will hear us.
I see the lawn also needs mowing… and fix that bloody gutter that you have been nagging me about for the last six months. And I’m not crying; I’m pissing through my eyes.
NOT NOW; I have headache.
No, I’m not done yet; see that you come home straight from work and this Bingo business on Wednesday nights is bullshìt. PUT THAT TOILET SEAT DOWN!!! Are you listening to me? I’m talking to you. You don’t love me anymore; When last did you give me
? I’m going back to my mother. 
Not now; I’m tired.
Then I did not even explore other possibilities like s*xual harassment when I don't like somebody. Boy, I’m going to have a ball. But then it probably won’t last for much longer before you’re going to insist on swapping back because you have discovered that it is not that easy to be a man
Not now. I’m … eh… eh… I don’t know what... but not now.
So, if you ladies want to be on top, be my guest and get on with it. It’s less work for us at the bottom. Oh shìt, last night while I was you, I forgot to take your pill.
Well my dear, do you still want gender equality? Of course you can have it but you will not be very smart to accept it. I would never surrender the upper hand if I had it.
I'll see ya as soon as it's safe again.
