You Don’t Understand Us

Yes, I know that we have given up trying to understand women a long time ago but that does not mean that you have to give up just as easily. We are more predictable than women and it is not that hard to understand us. professor

We are fragile creatures; not nearly as robust as women and therefore we need constant attention and reassurances, otherwise we sulk. Whereas women compare well with stoves that can be moved and shoved around at will, we are more like computers; we need to be handled with extreme care or our hard drives will crash. With this being said, remember that we don’t come with any sort of a factory guarantee. sigh

We are not good at multi-tasking; don’t tell us to fix the leaking tap while there is another job (like mowing the lawn) in progress or still pending. Our job queues can only accommodate one request at a time. And never repeat a request; that may be perceived as nagging and we will probably hang or go into a flat spin. For the best results, phrase your requests in such a way that we may think it was our own idea in the first place. idea

We are not good liars and are caught out every time; accept that we are not nearly as fluent in this department as you are. At least pretend to believe us some of the time. We need that confidence to develop this skill to an acceptable level. mumbling

We need plenty of sex; not just any sex – quality sex. We are insecure and we need to know that you needed it as much as we did. If you have to fake, do it with enthusiasm; we don’t want to feel as if you did it to do us a favor. You don’t want to know what social disorders can spawn from insecurity in our sex lives. It is not that we want it, we need it. Besides, you need to get on-line with a brain at regular intervals as well. devil

We are extremely sensitive; don’t yell at us. If you really need to send us to hell, do it in such a way that we can actually look forward to going there. We need to feel important and you should consciously work on it to maintain us in that frame of mind or we may stagnate. stuck

We are not good with dates; minor details like birthdays and anniversaries can very easily pass without us noticing it. It will be prudent to work important dates into the conversation regularly, starting a week or two before the big date so we can have enough time to think about a suitable gift. Some unsubtle hints will be helpful as we're not very good at that either. doh

There are many other things that are also important but I don’t want to go there now as you may think that we are full of shìt. Nevertheless, you will be surprised with how much you can achieve by getting these few things right. Just a little understanding is all you need to get the best out of us. It’s not that difficult, is it? grin
cats meow cats meow

You don’t have to pay me for this valuable advice. I render it as a free service in order to promote a better understanding between males and females. grin

Have a wonderful day!! wave

Comments (48)

Blimey...sounds too much like hard work to me....such complex creatures after all....
There’s me thinking that a nice home cooked meal and a bl** job every day was all that was needed to keep a man happy dunno moping
hi Rough,
yes, we are very complex creatures and your suggestion makes for a good start, but remember there are other things in life. Sex is not that important.liar
laugh hug
I couldn’t agree more cat....but eating something is vital.....nom nom nom tongue
I have my Arty wrapped around my little finger.....devil

Catfoot applause hug
Hi rough,
i suppose if the action you described can be seen as eating, then yes. And I still fail where the blowing comes it. It could be disastrous.laugh
But will you still recognize him? Now that he's a year older.dunno

By the way, tell him I said happy birthday. applause
If only it was this easy all the time .
Hi Annlee
Oh but it is, You only need a little understanding. And we are such lovable things when we are happy.laugh
The main problem, Cat, is that you men think that's what you want, but you're wrong. You don't know what you really want. No man I ever met knows what he needs, just what he thinks he wants.

The happy man is the one with the woman who is giving him what he needs and making him think he is getting what he wants.

If that was easy, we'd all be happy ...


And I'm not man-bashing in any way. Women tend to be just as bad scold
Give a woman a car, credit card, purse full of cash, shopping malls, coffee shops, and she will be bored before the day is out.

Give a man a dozen beer, can of beans, and a lighter and he will be occupied for the day.

Men are simpler.
hi Biff,
You see, it is exactly as I said. You don't understand us. We know what we want but we cannot express those desires because very soon some woman will come come around to tell us that we actually need something completely different.laugh
Hi Track,
Of course. We appreciate the simple things in life and we are easy to please. All we really need in a woman is an angel in the morning, a lady during the day and a b*tch at night.Is that asking for too much?laugh
My mail box is very active again this morning. The scammers are here in force.

Anyway, I have to nip down to the supermarket and the off sales. I'll be back in an hour.wave
Good post cat, I agree with you . I didn't realise just how complex men are until I started dating again.
Merry xmas

Hope Santa is good to

There are dolls now that emulate real female humans...sexually speaking that not speak or have a mind...perfect for stocking stuffers...

Point is...we all have opinions and get annoyed...but nothing beats real
I giggled all through that, as it is mostly true

Apart from the sex that is. Mostly you would take bad sex over no sex as well laugh

I was chatting to an ex last night and at one stage he said that I was the only one who understood him, so maybe I have a good understanding of men, wink
Hi Emmy
I assume that you know that 'complex' is just another word for being 'full of shit'rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Lou,
He should be, I was a good boy this year.grin

Sex dolls? No, not my scene; at least not until they get smart enough to talk sense afterwards, I love pillow talk.rolling on the floor laughing
Same problem that Ekself experiences. Whenever I employ this dry South-African humor, most people takes it seriously. It is as if people cannot see when I take the mickey out of myself. you just save my sanity..laugh
The sex part is also true. Well, I suppose we can reach a compromise because when it's good it is very good and when it'd bad it is still good.devil
I get Ek's humour too grin

I think that you should enter (canned laughter) after sentences for the others devil
I love reading her blogs.laugh
Canned laughter? What an innovative idea. Does it come in bottles or cans.

Stupid questiondoh

You did say canned.

Dang! All this, ( Don't do this, don't do that! Say this, don't say that! Do this all the time. This is just a Headaches! Yep, one after another. It's just like babysitting a GrownAss Men! .... moping

Whew! So much damn work these days....barf

Maybe Soon And Very Soon; Google Will Let Us Woman Know How To Build/ Make Us A Real Men. That We Don't Have To Remind Them To Do This, Don't Do That! Sit,Stand, Pick Up Things, Without having Back Problems. Needing No Sex All the dang time. Babysitting Them

But! For Right Now! Uh,......conversing
Hi Angel,
Maybe by then we'd be able to make our own women too, but I guess until then we're stuck with each other. rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Catfoot wave Well said and I have nothing to add.

I am starting to understand why I am single. cheers
Nah! It will be too much for Google to enter all that, into there computer basic info ....drinking
Hi Wen
it's not your fault. It's them who don't want to understand us.laugh

Well! If you agree with this. We will never get married!...confused
Don't worry Angel,
Maybe one day soon. Google is getting better every day. mind you, i don't need Google, my girlfriend knows everythinglaugh
people don't get married after living together in sin for almost five years.laugh
@ Angel, please don't give up on me you know how I feel moping

@ Catfoot, good to hear that handshake
No Problrm Wen'
That's what friends are for.laugh
Wenever And I, Don't Live Together!

He live There, And I Live Over There. duh!.....roll eyes

( If You Keep Agreeing With Catfoot)

scold We Will Never Be Together!
But I was not refering to Wn at all.rolling on the floor laughing
I was just practicing philosophy..professor
laugh rolling on the floor laughing

roll eyes.....You Always! Lying.
Very funny Cat... and very true! thumbs up laugh I enjoyed the read.

But.... I DO understand men and this is why I prefer to be alone... or work with animals (horses and dogs) wink
But Angel,
that's what blogs are for.grin

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