Valentine's Fight

My boyfriend and I had a petty fight on Valentine's day. And haven't talked since. I don't know how it became a fight actually. I told him I was kind of disappointed about the day, he told me "thank you for ruining Valentine's."

I got speechless. I didnt know what yo say because I suddenly got frustrated. It probably was fault for expecting something. I know that he has a lot on his plate right now. But I wasn't expecting anything elaborate. He knows me and that I like simple things. Come on.. I'm still a girl. I want something special on a special day. Not just a distracted "happy valentines day baby" reply.

What hurts me more is that he's ignoring me now. Wth! What is ignoring ech other for days going to resolve? And now, here I am, complaining about it here because I can't rant about it on social media, because my family follows me there abd they're nosy. And I'm oceans away from my friends. Or booze!

Some strawberry Ice cream for me please! sigh

Comments (59)

@Greg. Thanks. I can't do this on social media. I dont want people in our circle to think wrong about him. Or my family to think about my troubles, as they have troubles of their own. And when I talk about this, biases and sides will be formed among our friends. So, I really dont want that. I don't want him to look bad or anything. I wanted us to talk about this actually. Been asking for us to talk about tbis because the bad feelings accumulate. And I don't want to suddenly snap because of it. However, he isnt talking to me. We cant fix things if we dont communicate. And about his sweetness gone, he didn't really change until about last year. I don't know what to do with it.

Honestly, i feel silly having boy troubles af this age. But I dont have much experience. He is my first boyfriend. And only.
Kid needs a spanking... rolling on the floor laughing
Blue, I think you might have to come to terms that he has lost interest sigh

His change in mood in the last year, and his lack of communication isn't a good sign.
Oh wow. That actually hurts. But it might be true. And I need to process that. But I need to hear it straight from him so i can start moving on if I have to. Thanks @molly
I hope it's not true, Blue
I hope everything works out hug
I really hope so too. Thanks @molly
So Blue, your boyfriend just said out of nowhere, thanks for ruining Valentines? Even if he was busy and you wanted to do something for Valentines, for him to say that just does not add up. dunno
The other thing you could do, put a kilogram of heroin under his car seat then tell the cops he's dealing drugs.
@johnny, we were talking, i said valentines was just an ordinary day, nothing special because of some unmet expectations. Then he made that comment.

@pat, your suggestions are dark and really twisty. scold laugh
Things are starting to add up a little now.
Perhaps too many not met expectations, definite miscommunication and common misunderstanding.

It seems that in this story he is a " drama queen"on that day,, maybe he had emotional crisis, maybe not.... my advise think carefully about what You want: you want him to impress your family etc.. But you don't know how to deal with him and his emotions.. first and only boyfriend- it's great, I have many friends who are together for more than 30-40+ years since college or even high school.. arguments will always be in relationships.. What matters most is how quick you will bounce back to normal.. use this time of your break to listen to your not only heart but mind as well.. if He is the one you really want,, or maybe you want Him to meet Your expectations of a perfect partner and he is not really fitting in that suit..

And don't worry,, whatever will happen - will happen.. and it will be for the best
You could hide in the bushes and throw falafel at him.
thumbs up
@ BlueScrubs,
Part 1 of 2.
Let's bring "the starters" for the meal, shall we?.

"Well, for starters" as, your own person said in the section "about your perfect match" of your profile as if your perfect match is some kind of meal,

I would love to hear your boyfriend's side of the story as well, not just yours.

Maybe, if he is also on CS social, dating site and looking for a girlfriend or any other person for whatever reason, he can just pass by your blog about him, read this and, provide in the comments section his response to your "complaining" as you called it and reason why he is "not sweet anymore" as "he used to be", as it was presented by you consistently for 3 years, prior to changing a year ago and, in this 4 years LDR relationship.

I do know a few things about the mindset and lifestyle in Saudi Arabia both from locals and non locals/foreigners who went to S. Arabia to work, worked and lived there, all of them met in person and, in real life and have been friends.

I have also spoken with men from the nearby countries of S.Arabia who had LDR relationships a bit further away from you are and, none of them, considered it as, a LDR relationship and distance for them for, as they said "It was just a short flight, could get there in a few hours and the same went for their girlfriend, travelling to their own country".

I've also seen several profiles on CS who are "not single/not looking", are dating or already in a relationship in real life with a person of the opposite sex.

Your profile is the only profile from the several profiles stated above that, it does not assign to the truth or reality of their situation and more specifically, their relationship status.

And, that is just one and only in regards to your profile.

What is the reason that you have withheld and hidden this information from your profile?

What is the reason that, you have not disclosed in your profile, your real relationship status and disclosed this only on your first blog titled "Valentines fight"?

This, only after the incidents presented by you to have occurred and in the way you have presented these to have occurred.

Nowhere did and do you mention on your profile that, you are already in a relationship as you stated in your first blog on CS that you are for 4 years.

You have mentioned this only on your first blog on CS, and only after you have been "ignored" by your boyfriend of 4 years, your "Valentines fight" and him complaining that, "you ruined his Valentine's day", obviously through your expectations about the "special day".

Your expectations obviously were as, they were presented by you on your first blog, your boyfriend to do and you to get/ receive "something special on a special day".

What this "something special" exactly you wanted him to do and you to get and receive, you do not clarify.

What if your boyfriend bought for you a diamond ring on Valentine's day that after you finished off with him and moved on to the next man in your life, you could sell and, make good money out of it?

Would you consider the above as "something special" your boyfriend did "on special day" and on "Valentine's day" for you?.

And, does speciality and your boyfriend doing "something special" for you depends on the economical value and price of what he would have done for you?.

If yes, what is the minimum price and economical value of what your boyfriend could or would do for you, can accept?.

TokyoRoque in the comments section of this blog asked "if you did anything for your boyfriend on Valentine's day" and, "What did you do?".

No answer was provided by you. What is the reason why of you not saying or wanting to say about what you did?

Surely, you aren't concerned about Facebook or other social media as you supported to Greg, commentator of your blog who suggested a mediator as a solution to the "Valentine's fight" that you feared.

Or that, "your boyfriend looking bad" as you said.

The above is totally unjustified and only highlights your own prejudice toward the OP. The fact that your comment is in the form of a series of questions gives you plausible deniability but doesn't make it benign.
Part 2 of 2,
As far as the contact requirements of you by a man you were/are actively looking for, set up on your profile is concerned, this is just one and only.

"He must not live in Saudi Arabia", where your location is or where you are currently presenting your person through your profile to be located at.

When exactly, have you set up on your profile, the specific contact requirement allowing and enabling only men and all men outside S.Arabia and no men inside S.Arabia where you presented your person to be located to contact you?.

Or, if you prefer,

When exactly have you set up on your profile the specific contact requirement of you,blocking out ONLY all the men in S. Arab. where you presented your person to be currently located at and, not any men in any of the rest countries outside S.A?.

Have you set the specific contact requirement up before you wrote this blog or after you wrote this?.

Or, have you set this up before you have a 4year LDR relationship with the guy outside S. Arabia that you are complaining about that, he did "not do something special on a special day"?.

Or, was it after and during your 4 year LDR relationship?.

Having not told us all yet, what "special" "something" you did "on a special day" and, Valentine's day.

Based on your contact requirements of you by a man on the CS dating site,

As long as ANY married, separated, not single/not looking, single, wanting an intimate encounter, friends/hang out, pen pal/e-mail etc.of ANY age between the ages of 18 to 99 man, can contact you as long as, he does "not live in S. Arabia" or, located where you presented your person to be located at.

Or as your profile behind the scenes and not, at the forefront says.

As, at the forefront and not behind the scenes, where all can notice and see , it's a completely different story as, at the forefront you are looking for a man only between the ages of 30-45 only.

As far as your blog is concerned, copied and below, you mentioned in it,

"I know that he has a lot on his plate right now. But I wasn't expecting anything elaborate.
He knows me and that I like simple things".

"Come on.. I'm still a girl. I want something special on a special day. Not just a distracted 'happy valentines day baby' reply".

Prior to this you mentioned what follows, copied and pasted below,

"I told him I was kind of disappointed about the day, he told me ,'thank you for ruining Valentine's'."  

Another commentator(Johnny) asked on this blog, having also not received an answer to his previous question,

"So Blue, your boyfriend just said out of nowhere, thanks for ruining Valentines? Even if he was busy and you wanted to do something for Valentines, for him to say that just does not add up".  

Your response(copied & pasted) to the above question was,

"@johnny, we were talking, i said valentines was just an ordinary day, nothing special".

It was at this exact point and your response that, going through the comments in your blog, "things did not up" for me and, was certain that, it was all lies.

Your blog was a complaint about your boyfriend "not doing something special on a special day" and "Valentine's day".

In your blog, you labelled "Valentine's day" as special but, in this last comment you said, "we were talking, i said Valentine's day is just an ordinary day, nothing special".

First, it was a "special day" then, the same day was, "just an ordinary day, nothing special".
After posting your blog and several hours after this, I noticed that, you changed your profile photo, placing the photo that we all see now.

This time, more groomed in it than the previous one, much more make up than before and a whole pile of make up having supported that, "you are not high maintenance".
The inconsistencies mentioned up to now are not the only ones noticed but, I have more important things to do with my time and just these, are already more than enough

What the hell happened to cswelcome ? This is like the Holy Inquisition.
Who made you (@ Stargaze) the judge, jury and executioner?
Your presumption is astonishing.
@stargazer. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog and for your comment.

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