Jealousy - what is it good for?
Even animals get jealous - for attention, or competing for the same thing - and Nature doesn't build in pointless emotions, so what is jealousy good for?Anger gives us the strength and adrenalin rush to fight
Fear lends us wings to run away
Happiness rebuilds our strength to live another day
Love inspires us to build towards a future
etc
Jealousy seems such a destructive emotion but is it? I'm including things like
Envy of the achievements of others
Jealousy when a loved one seems to be making a connection with another and we feel threatened
Resentment when someone else is being praised
Benefits?
Comments (153)
I remember this woman I dated a long time ago, she got mad at me because I didn't get jealous.
She said, "I just talked to my ex-boyfriend, and you didn't get jealous?"
I answered, "Nah, what for? If you want to be with me, okay. If you want to go back to him, okay."
Then for some reason, oh I don't know why, she shouted, "That's it! I'm through with you. If you can't get jealous after I just talked to my ex, then I don't want you!"
Sheesh! I was just trying to be nice and not make a big deal about it. What'd I say that made her mad?
I always believed jealousy was a sign your relationship is in trouble but hey, sometimes feeling a flash of jealousy wakes you up to realizing you feel more than you knew. So I guess not caring what she does is also a clue to your feelings?
although I'm all confused about what Jealousy means now.
Anyways, I gotta jot down what you said, about the reverse effects of jealousy, for my next book, err comic book.
I've always believed jealousy destructive and dangerous and hated it when I felt flashes of it.
I had one relationship a few thousand years ago which was ruled by the green-eyed monster - oh aye partly low self-esteem, also partly finding out that the guy I thought was spending too much time looking at others really was looking round. He departed to make his next partner wonder why she felt threatened and insecure
Jealousy is also non-romantic and can spur us on to achieve more of what we envy others for having - hence my opening comment
Sometimes I just blog for fun, you know. But hey, if you can get anything useful from this, yay
I think most of us earlier in life grappled with jealousy in one way shape or form, some of us identified or understood its negative impact, learned, then decided not to let it seep into our lives any more, some people had more difficulty and continue to deal with its consequences.
Must shoot out the day's work has started, back later with coffee
In our society certain emotions often get labelled as 'negative' or 'wrong' and associated with other negative traits, so many people - instead of acknowledging them and learning from them, suppress them (which only makes them reappear in some deviated form) of 'exchange' them for other emotions. So, if 'envy' is the sign of weakness and low self-esteem in our society, a person would rather feel 'angry' or 'sad' instead of 'envious' (switch to another emotion), which is more acceptable, for example.
I think that it's natural to feel jealousy/envy/resentment in certain situations. They are usually the signal of some deeper dissatisfaction we have about our life, ourselves or our relationships, something we should think about, acknowledge, address and resolve - if possible.
Since we all have regrets and dissatisfaction in our lives - at least in some way - it's not good to feed our own jealousy/envy/resentment, as well as other people's. Everything that is fed - grows. Let's grow some more pleasant emotions instead.
I enjoy my life...and positive energy is vital....
I remember a quote that was written on my late husband's diary.
Jealousy is a weapon that often kills it's possessor. I think it is a weapon you should handle with care.
I like what Tokyo said in that we all exerpience it when we r young..we learn over time that it really does serve no purpose in our life apart from what i said above.
Ive no need to feel jealousy towards any individual and that comes with maturity as Tokyo said.
as you said, competing for the same thing ...can get very emotional and intense and might bring the worst out of us at times. I think we should be grateful for what we have rather than what we want.
Deedee - yup, if I was chatting up a fab man at a party and my other half simply didn't notice I would be a little taken aback - for sure if he was nose to nose with a gorgeous blonde I would notice! But if he made a scene about it I would be horrified. There's a fairly fine line between healthy and morbid.
KN hi!
Molly, I know you are one who has never felt romantic jealousy or possessiveness, always impresses me. You've never looked at anything - a job, a car, a lovely garden - and thought I'd like to have that -
then worked to get it? Since you refer to the Tone(d) comment
That's true of everyone, of course, I just remember more about you two ladies for some reason. Okay, the reason being that I slightly envy you both
Hey, Wen
JJ oh yes we all have a touch of jealousy, human nature is human nature
But that wouldn't mean I would be jealous of the person that presently has one.
You tell it you accept what it sees and what it feels. Then show it that it is over-reacting and putting itself into overdrive for no reason. Logically explain it to lizard. Lizard then snoozes happily in the sun
(I noticed that there are a LOT of Scorpio and Taurus people on Blogs and I think that's the reason why the atmosphere here is often so passionate.
I know nothing about star signs
I looked at that particular older sister straight in her face and began laughing.In fact it was actually her was jealous of what they had.She had accused the wrong baby sister.
I like having things but my mother brought me up to know what is actually important in life such as family and friends and material things really wasn't that important.
There is good and bad jealousy.
But if it where that easy wouldn't every one be doing it.
Wort a read In my opinion.
And the answer to your question is two-fold. Firstly, not everybody probably know about it. And secondly, not everything good for you is easy to do. Hell, very few things that are good for you are easy to do.
And thanks for the titi info. Very informative.
The only difference is monkeys only have the lizard/monkey brain I presume? So I they can only go with that brain, they don't have the human brain to counteract it.
what happened to your Movie? I saw the pic of it when I logged in, and now it's your pic with no mention of the movie. What happened?
GEESH! and here I was all ready to go see the movie and enjoy it with an artificially flavored popcorn and 10-40wt automotive oil in it, and a 128 ounce spiked soda.
IMO! Jealousy Is A Waste Of Time! Especially In Cyber world (Internet)....
When you scowl at someone for having it and eat yourself up with resentment that you don't - that's what jealousy is famous for. But it isn't the bad guy, in its natural form
Work with me here babe
Non, er what is a lizard brain? One that blinks slowly?
Non - I shall rush off to the titi monkeys as soon as I am caught up with comments
When my cat is monopolising my lap my dog gets quite beady-eyed about it. Life might be simpler if we could react as openly and simply as animals do. I liked the male titi monkeys holding back the females when there was an attractive male around
don't have time to stay let alone read your blog, but I spotted your picture so I had to pop in only to say how glam and beautiful you're looking
I'm jealous
Whatever you're doing keep it up kiddo