Friends & Acquaintances

A friend can be anybody who is not an enemy, therefore even an unknown person in another country, whom you have never heard of can be deemed a friend, simply because he belongs to a certain nation or a group of people. This is only for lack of a better word because the word ‘friend’ has another deeper meaning.

The word is often confused with ‘acquaintances’ who are not friends at all. Acquaintances include all the people you know who are not friends or family. They are normally brought to you by circumstances which are quite unlike friends who you carefully choose from those you are acquainted with.

Something else we like to call friends are pen pals. These are people who correspond with each other via snail mail, email, social sites, and so forth. Meeting once or twice does not make them friends; they are merely correspondents who happen to be acquainted with each other. If you want to call them your friends, try asking them to help when you are in a spot of bother.

And then there are your ‘work friends’. When you have a special relationship with one or more of your colleagues at work, you cannot call him or her as a friend if just because you ‘cover’ for each other, have lunch together, or have a few pints together after work. If you don’t spend time together outside of the work setup, you are just acquaintances, forced together by circumstances. Will you still keep up the ritual if one of you changes job? I think not. This is more of an alliance or a clique.

You also have casual friends, buddies; people you like and who you spend time with voluntary because you like them. Some of them are only your friends because there is something to gain by it. You too probably have a few ‘friends’ purely for what there is to gain, be that a promotion at work, influence, prestige or any other favors.

There are many other special relationships formed by circumstances, too many to mention here but the bottom line is that they are not your friends. While it is not impossible for a deeper friendship to develop from it, friends are not forced together by circumstances but rather drawn together by a mutual affection.

Then what are friends? A friend is a person who shares a mutual bond of affection with you, other than love or family ties. Somebody who earned your respect and who you have selected from those you are acquainted with. Somebody you would entrust with your house keys when you go on vacation.

The real test for a friend is when you are in need' not simply because he can help you but because he wants to; somebody who would do himself short to help his friend. A friend in need is a friend indeed.


Have a wonderful day