thought to ponder #5

social vs antisocial

after reading the blog asking why do you keep coming back/what keeps you here ?
and a comment on one of my blogs saying " I am here to have fun , and I chooser to “play moron”

I started thinking what is social and when does it become antisocial
hug hug

some say they come here everyday to interact with friends they have made here
but with facebook
snapchat and skype to name just a few
people can be in contact 24/7 even without needing CS at all

even if CS is their only means of contact they can use the Mail option without ever needing to comment on the blogs or forums

i myself am just as guilty at times to poke fun at a blogger or leave a sarcastic or in my opinion a humerus comment if the mood of the blog seems to encourage it

some seem to come here day after day and have been here for many years using numerous names and their M.O.never changes

we dont use the T word yet in my opinion they have only one agenda to "kill" or destroy a blog...

in may i use the term "real world" a person who acts in this way is outcast from a group

the guy who constantly talks dirty
the woman who dresses like a "slut" flaunting and flirting with every man married or single
the bigots
the racists
the ones who rave on and on with the same topic

they soon find the party invitations etc quickly vanish

yet here they are actively encouraged

if i may put forward my opinion ,i would class these people as sociopaths

teddybear hug hug

Comments (76)

good day, Sir. i think one can be social and anti-social at the same time. social at work, not social at home.
What's the old saying about scum floating to the surface

It all depends what society one find themselves in. For example, a slut in the whorehouse is social.
Ok bloody

How about the person that comes every night and cuts the fence around your goats or the one that killed your dog ?
I'm sure they are accepted as being outstanding members of your community scold
Yes they are, as they all go to church and i'm not. So i'm the antisocial one.
What about selectively social?
hard to answer without an examplerolling on the floor laughing
I’m not anti-social in real life but lately, I’ve been shunning a few people in my life.

I don’t know what is it but I don’t mind not stepping out of the house even for days. I certainly am not depressed but I really do like my own company a lot. The only thing I’m looking forward is when I get to Skype with my Arty. Due to the time difference, he’s like 13 hours behind, it can be a little tricky for us both but good things are worth waiting for.

I really like being on CS. I know I won’t meet a lot of them in real life but it’s still nice to be able to interact with them on here...
See mimi that's what I don't get

You say interact with people here..

But like an iceberg 90% is below the surface
So interacting on a blog just to say .....hi.....
Is in my mind only to advertise what group your in if your in favour and say "hey look at my social standing on CS"

"I'M with the popular kids "

Example, I talk to my neighbours one side of my property. But not on the otherside.
But OB, I don’t say ‘Hi’ to everyone on here, just the ones I like grin

Maybe you’re right and there’s some truth in what you’re saying...but whatever it is, I find it hard to ever leave CS. I’ve tried and failed. Maybe I didn’t try hard enough? grin
that's normal behavior no one gets on with everyone

so if the one on your left was caught pinching your undies off the line or peering in your window would you still be as friendly
and the one on the right was always making s*xual innuendoes or putting you down devil
To be fair we get on. So I know they wouldn't. The ones on other side. I'd confront them and they know it.

Attitudes make a difference. Which is the case between my 2 neighbours.
So you know the difference between right and wrong what is acceptable behaviour and what is not
It's not even about behaviour, but attitudes. One of my neighbours owns their home, the other doesn't and there is a massive difference in their attitude.

Too many factors to shy someone is social or anti social. But on a basic level. Attitude makes a difference.

Like when you're being obtuse, you know you are. I'm like meh Crest. When you are being thoughtful I'm like ok and join in.
Shy = why roll eyes
So people who have been here 10 years or more and there are many who come on every day and for use of a better word are just here to get their jollies by f*ck people off professor

Would you consider them normal ?
Would you invite them into your house and leave them alone with your children or play murder in the dark ?

Define f*ck you off?

If you're acting stupid and they are pointing out your are being stupid. Yes, I would because if you act stupid you are asking for it.

If they are going out of their way to offend and insult you. No, I wouldn't because I don't want that kind of person in my life.
Annoy people
Insult people
Use sarcasm and "dark" humour to create negative emotion then feed off that emotion

Just be a complete arsehole and think they are clever and superior

For many this place is ideal to bring out the side of themselves they known full well they wouldn't get away with in real may not have said it but I'll say it, trolls, the ones who never have a nice word to say and follow others around to poke fun at or say nasty things to them.
I'm here for alot of reasons....I like to learn new for instance learn about new cultures from TRs blog...or like environmental awareness from some of your blogs
But I think what I said to open with is why alot of people are show a side of themselves good/bad that they can't or are unable to in real life.

I know a man on another forum who's been there for 17 years and still comes every day and says that he will do that for the next 20 years if the forum still exists then! professor laugh

This is a virtual cafe. People socialize with a group of people and find it more fun than one-to-one socializing.

Forums, blogs, etc. are in decline for a long long time. Their best days are long over. They were first replaced by Facebook, then with Twitter, Instagram... Young people aren't interested in places like this. They are too slow and boring for them.

You will rarely see a new quality member on a place like CS (or any other similar platform whatsoever). The best ones are usually the old members who keep the place going - mostly out of habit.

That other forum I am a member of exists for a very long time. It was a very good forum once and you could learn so much there. For example, there were psychologists and psychiatrists writing in the "Psychology" section, as well as plenty of enthusiasts interested in the subject. Do you know how it looks like now? You can only find people with various mental conditions there trying to help each other and people with some everyday problems they cannot cope with (and very often sound like: "I'm 18 years old, I've never had a girlfriend and I will kill myself"). I almost don't even open that section any more.

Some old members who remember "better times" keep protesting about the quality of the forum and its members, but there's nothing to be done about it. New members are rare and among them - most are people who use the place to vent their frustrations or simply write anything (sometimes completely incomprehensible). There are some "intelligent trolls" there, too. Those are people who can write intelligent and interesting things and then - get crazy laugh - and destroy dozens of threads and get 10 people temporarily banned in the process. Yet, they keep them. If you remove them from the forum, who will stay? Who will write? When you compare them to those writing incomprehensible posts, these ones at least sometimes write something interesting and mind-provoking.

I ask myself every day why I even open that old forum (where I returned to 4 months ago after many years of absence). I can - at least - practise English here and there? dunno (And I personally met a lot of people from that forum and I know that - at least the normal ones laugh - ARE REAL).
An enlightening argument so your saying we should allow ,nay encourage the actions of the lunatics on the off chance in a moment of near sanity they write/say something interesting

The T word is not to be uttered here in brings down the wrath of the mods

...We live and die by the power and glory of the mods... angel
The mod I know I'd gladly run over grin

But my apologies OP...I shall refrain from using that word from now on.blues

What I wanted to say is this:

We cannot do anything about it.

You cannot prevent people from coming to an internet forum and write. Moderators can remove those that create too many problems if a lot of members complain. It happens here from time to time, too.

However, moderators will not remove members who don't create problems or members who have some sporadic strange moments. laugh

The first rule anyone should learn about forums is:

Do not feed the trolls.

I noticed several threads on CS forums opened in the last few days by some "new members" that were obviously opened just to create fights, like a 50-year old man looking for a 18-year old girl, because all women his age are "wrecks", etc. People shouldn't allow themselves being dragged into fights with such "people". If nobody replies to such threads - their OPs will sooner or later disappear, because they don't get the attention they need. Who knows who OPs are! Might be some teenagers with a lot of free time at their hands.

The only thing one can do is - ignore problematic people and support blogs/threads of those who (you think) deserve your attention. smile
What about Mods posing as forum/blog posters?
Dee, like who? Mods being active on blogs and forums is CS myth as, I see it.

I don't know who moderators of CS are. I don't know if they are ordinary members who voluntarily moderate as well (with their own or some other profile) or some paid CS staff. I wrote two times to CS staff - once because I wanted one thread I opened removed and the other time when I asked one technical question (about merging posts from my previous profiles into one). They have never replied to me, not even with one word. I don't think that there are many people maintaining this site and taking care of the members and their needs. I think that we are pretty much left alone here.

I remember that the new members said that Matchdoctor deleted its forums and blogs, because they made a bad image of the site (people constantly complained about scammers, etc.) and that they required too much time to maintain, yet were useless. That can happen here, too, if people continue fighting and complaining. Forums and blogs aren't an important part of a dating site.

I think we should enjoy what we have while it lasts and don't ask for much. dunno
I've seen some strange activity on here at times and also people talk...and maybe I'm silly to believe it but I definitely feel there's more going on than meets the eye.
From what I've witnessed.
That's directed to both TR and Naivete.
Sorry Crest..delete my comments if you like and u feel I've crossed a line.
Nieve don't shout at me !!!
DD It was a joke

And I agree strange things do happen but that's another conspiracy theory wink
It also could be considered a-social people too. Social-Anti Social-Asocials, All together here at CS mixed like in a salad.
By the way...Anti-social means against morally appropriate behaviour while asocial means avoidance of social life. Antisocial behaviour is caused by repression of emotions, bad experiences and negative thinking. Asocial behaviour simply develops as one’s attitude towards life. It could be due to introverted nature (keeping one’s feelings to one’s self), autism, and schizophrenia (delusional psychiatric disorder).
I agree the internet seems to attract that sort of personality

thumbs up
We might just have to compare notes then on that Crest wink
My mailbox is always open

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Hi Wave, maybe if people would just be themselves would stop some of the guessing as to who they are and what they are.

I see some good comments from you and other bloggers. Just wanted to add my little two scents. cheers
Wen I would imagine when people a friendless and boring in real life by their own actions the last thing they want is to project that same image in the net

Why be Norman Osborn
When you can be the evil crazy green goblin
Here's a thought for you to ponder bout wave ....

Dump on my blog and I'll have my cat dump on yours conversing


You know, it just never would occur to me to take a picture of my cat pooping.....huh dunno

Maybe I’ve just never been that bored

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