Theory: Women should be clear, men should not
Scenario - They are watching TV at his house. Woman rubs her shoulders, mmm, I’m cold. Man nods, yup, it is quite cold, and carries on watching TV. Eventually she gets up in a huff, finds a blanket, then sulks because he doesn’t care about her. He is completely bewildered.Theory - women should be clear. If she wants a blanket, she should say mmm, I’m cold, could you get me a blanket? He will. Men are nice, but not automatically caring.
Scenario - he comes back home after a really bad day and collapses in a chair. Honey, would you get me a coffee? She says (or maybe just thinks) huh, what did your last slave die of? You think your day was so bad? Etc.
Theory - men should not be clear. If he wants cossetting and sympathy, he should say only ‘I’ve had a terrible day’ and then stare into space looking stressed. Her natural nurturing will kick in, she will bring him a coffee, even give him a shoulder rub (or any other little service which might cheer him up) because her protective caring instincts have been aroused. Women are nice, when not belligerent.
Just a theory, and not mine, but I thought it had legs.
Comments (60)
There are advantages (or are they disadvantages?) to being used to doing things for yourself. You don't expect others to do them for you.
Another theory, both are takers with neither of either givers ....
another theory, the relationship is doomed
G'day to you Biff
Aren't all relationships doomed?
The only issue I would have is if there was a pattern of him being lazy or unthinking. I don't count the small one-off occasions, only the patterns.
So not a single guy has ever thought sheesh I wish a woman would SAY what she wanted, not expect me to guess?
It’s almost like man and woman habe evolved so as to totally misunderstand and misinterpret each other. Why is that?
I have always found it so difficult to read those little signs that women give when they expect a man to understand completeley what is required - when in reality we are such simple, direct creatures, we haven’t got a hope in hell!
On the second point about men, well if I say nothing and sit there hoping some nice service will come my way....it never does...the world just carries on around me. But if I dare to say ‘cup of coffee would be nice, Ive had a terrible day’ the answer usually comes as ‘well you haven’t had as bad a day as me..if you need coffee, get it yourself!’
No, I am afraid that in this world, men can never win..we are always in the wrong! Hahaha
But many of us here will end up on our own without... doomed you might say, at our age mature cheddar cheese is becoming very scarce
But I could be wrong, Its just another theory of mine
Got to go... enjoy your day
I don't immediately pick up on nuances. I have always said to boyfriends/friends to just say what they are thinking rather than expect me to mind read. I can deal with things better that way.
I think that is why I understand men easier than some women. I get them easier.
There are disadvantages to not thinking like a woman, but there are also advantages. I don't expect others to read my mind either. And don't have hissy-fits or drama queen moments as a result.
Next time try the 'terrible day' and looking stressed and unhappy. Let me know how you get on - maybe, just maybe, one of the lady bloggers would think about it and think hmm, maybe I would worry about my poor stressed bloke instead of trying to prove how much harder my life was.
See, I know it would work on me. Well, I think it would. I have been known to sit some shredded person down (male or female) and rush off to get them something to make them feel better. Now I'm wondering if I was played
I got used to have to tell men what I want (in a gentle manner
Why can't we make ourselves one perfect male android?
Even the android would have to be programmed for differing expectations
Now, I do notice changes in moods, etc. I am not totally insensitive. But it is still up to the person to spell out what is wrong with them.
Another advantage of being me is, I don't think everything is about me. In that, if someone is in bad form, I don't immediately think it is directed at me, something I did. Hell, I never think that at all
I agree with you, we are not “designed” to take care of ourselves. we are too busy doing .. stuff. but we do all go weak in the knees, when women compliments us.
also, we do leave the toilet seat up., and there is nothing to be ashamed of.
I can not guess. what´s for lunch?
Interesting blog Biff.
Proven Fact!
HOWEVER, He was great at making drinks without question. I'm too lazy to make myself an drink with alcohol for some reason but all I had to do was mention a drink sounded nice and off to be a bartender he would go. I miss that about him but still use it when he comes to visit because...it still works. He just goes on auto pilot. He took great pride in his drinks, like layering B-52s or white russians or whatever. I have no pride, drink goes in the glass then in my belly.
I also learned if he didn't feel well, I needed to take my nuturing out of town because if I tried to cater to him - he went balistic. If he didn't feel good he wanted to be left alone - all my other men turned into babies when they were sick - he went from Mr nice guy to Mr Meanie.
I seem to have no problems what-so-ever getting along absolutely amazing with the dog.
Not really....If she was clear Id get her the blanket, If I wanted a coffee I would make it myself, if one appeared without me asking It would make me rather pleased.
The lid AND seat of the loo should be down at all times to stop pythons emerging into the house.
By now we should be absolutely the opposite and yup, some things we've learned but I still put me first, however close a second comes. So I guess I'll be single for ever and ever. Hey.
Vier, you're what-iffing again