My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou ( Archived) (35)

Mar 16, 2009 12:21 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
nothernstar
nothernstarnothernstarMontreal, Quebec Canada11 Threads 341 Posts
My X-girlfriend and I, We had a team meeting! She wanted to completely stop working, so she can study for the next 3 years. OK, she wanted to better her self.

She`s an accountant, and want`s to become a Chartered account. she is a 4.3!
would you better yourself if you had the opportunity?

But because of the intensity of the courses, she has to devote 110% of her time, To studies and courses, she can not work.

She told me that I would have to pay all the bills, plus her expenses.
yes she`s getting a student loan. But that’s peanuts.

Do you know how much this books go for? and Yes some you can get used, But not the main ones. There Bible coast when completed $8,000cdn.

I saw one book $375.00cdn Wow.

I went to my Lawyer and had papers drown. was this right.?

I feel what if she decides after all that, it`s over I`m Out.?

She got so mad when i presented her the papers. I though the sky was about to fall
Is this, what our love is based on, you have no trust in me. In the end, I’ll make 75k start 3 years 120k+ and then I’ll take care of you.

So now I have been in the Dog-House, she left 1 ½ months ago, and moved in with her mother! I called this weekend to see how she was doing and she’s still mad at me. devil very mad

what do I do?
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Mar 16, 2009 12:25 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Mercedes1
Mercedes1Mercedes1Sydney, New South Wales Australia101 Threads 1 Polls 3,764 Posts
Stick to what you beleive inwave
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Mar 16, 2009 12:27 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
monty611
monty611monty611gladstone, Queensland Australia4 Threads 1 Polls 147 Posts
nothernstar: My X-girlfriend and I, We had a team meeting! She wanted to completely stop working, so she can study for the next 3 years. OK, she wanted to better her self.

She`s an accountant, and want`s to become a Chartered account. she is a 4.3!
would you better yourself if you had the opportunity?

But because of the intensity of the courses, she has to devote 110% of her time, To studies and courses, she can not work.

She told me that I would have to pay all the bills, plus her expenses.
yes she`s getting a student loan. But that’s peanuts.

Do you know how much this books go for? and Yes some you can get used, But not the main ones. There Bible coast when completed $8,000cdn.

I saw one book $375.00cdn Wow.

I went to my Lawyer and had papers drown. was this right.?

I feel what if she decides after all that, it`s over I`m Out.?

She got so mad when i presented her the papers. I though the sky was about to fall
Is this, what our love is based on, you have no trust in me. In the end, I’ll make 75k start 3 years 120k+ and then I’ll take care of you.

So now I have been in the Dog-House, she left 1 ½ months ago, and moved in with her mother! I called this weekend to see how she was doing and she’s still mad at me.

what do I do?








Throw her to the kerb and get a new one head banger
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Mar 16, 2009 12:28 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
WOW....I would think it has something to do with having papers drawn up and that she feels you don't trust her and do you really trust her enough to make that big of a commitment???

Did you ask her what upset her soooooo much????


I already did that...and struggled for 2 years while doing it...BUT I got to switch careers in the process to something I love doing....wave hug kiss hug heart beating
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Mar 16, 2009 12:32 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Drewski
DrewskiDrewskiOlds, Alberta Canada9 Threads 343 Posts
In response to: what do I do?


Nothing. You already did the right thing. You're no good to anybody if you are weak so, no matter what, you have to be strong and, throwing money out at a time like this for somebody that is not family is weak in the head.professor
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Mar 16, 2009 12:42 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
maybesoon
maybesoonmaybesoonthe moon, Queensland Australia16 Threads 1 Polls 951 Posts
Drewski: Nothing. You already did the right thing. You're no good to anybody if you are weak so, no matter what, you have to be strong and, throwing money out at a time like this for somebody that is not family is weak in the head.


where her responsibility, doesn't she know that this is a recession, where the hell you gonna find all this money!!! and what happens mate if you cant pay something one week, (sell the dog)....

cheers
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Mar 16, 2009 12:46 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
virgiomonkey
virgiomonkeyvirgiomonkeyAuckland, New Zealand4,241 Posts
nothernstar: My X-girlfriend and I, We had a team meeting! She wanted to completely stop working, so she can study for the next 3 years. OK, she wanted to better her self.

She`s an accountant, and want`s to become a Chartered account. she is a 4.3!
would you better yourself if you had the opportunity?

But because of the intensity of the courses, she has to devote 110% of her time, To studies and courses, she can not work.

She told me that I would have to pay all the bills, plus her expenses.
yes she`s getting a student loan. But that’s peanuts.

Do you know how much this books go for? and Yes some you can get used, But not the main ones. There Bible coast when completed $8,000cdn.

I saw one book $375.00cdn Wow.

I went to my Lawyer and had papers drown. was this right.?

I feel what if she decides after all that, it`s over I`m Out.?

She got so mad when i presented her the papers. I though the sky was about to fall
Is this, what our love is based on, you have no trust in me. In the end, I’ll make 75k start 3 years 120k+ and then I’ll take care of you.

So now I have been in the Dog-House, she left 1 ½ months ago, and moved in with her mother! I called this weekend to see how she was doing and she’s still mad at me.

what do I do?


Wow....simple 'drop kick her right out of your Life'....I smell a 'Gold Digger 'here......Trust your Gut feeling....I did exactly what you did once supported my so called partner,and her young daughter though University....once my ex-partner got her degree...I was history...and of course being a 'Woman',it was all my fault of course.....

laugh grin cheers
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Mar 16, 2009 12:50 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Karma3
Karma3Karma3Somewhere, Tamil Nadu India84 Threads 588 Posts
Its not a matter of trust, its a matter of money. Being 43 yrs old I'd have imagined that she was mature enough to acknowledge that you deserve a return on your investment. These papers you talk about - what do they say?
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Mar 16, 2009 12:52 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
bohemianjack
bohemianjackbohemianjackEast Central, Minnesota USA6 Threads 2 Polls 2,699 Posts
nothernstar: My X-girlfriend and I, We had a team meeting! She wanted to completely stop working, so she can study for the next 3 years. OK, she wanted to better her self.

She`s an accountant, and want`s to become a Chartered account. she is a 4.3!
would you better yourself if you had the opportunity?

But because of the intensity of the courses, she has to devote 110% of her time, To studies and courses, she can not work.

She told me that I would have to pay all the bills, plus her expenses.
yes she`s getting a student loan. But that’s peanuts.

Do you know how much this books go for? and Yes some you can get used, But not the main ones. There Bible coast when completed $8,000cdn.

I saw one book $375.00cdn Wow.

I went to my Lawyer and had papers drown. was this right.?

I feel what if she decides after all that, it`s over I`m Out.?

She got so mad when i presented her the papers. I though the sky was about to fall
Is this, what our love is based on, you have no trust in me. In the end, I’ll make 75k start 3 years 120k+ and then I’ll take care of you.

So now I have been in the Dog-House, she left 1 ½ months ago, and moved in with her mother! I called this weekend to see how she was doing and she’s still mad at me.

what do I do?


I think you jumped the gun doh

Kind of too late now, but why didn't you negotiate with her?

What papers, you say she was your g/f... division of property?

Your situation isn't clear, but I would've talked to her before drawing papers

Maybe married her and drawn a prenup?



"Say what you want or be satisfied with what you get and by all means be able to take no for an answer... occasionally." ~Bohemianjack, on communication.
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Mar 16, 2009 12:53 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
rusty_knight
rusty_knightrusty_knightGozo, Malta175 Threads 2 Polls 6,840 Posts
Drewski: Nothing. You already did the right thing. You're no good to anybody if you are weak so, no matter what, you have to be strong and, throwing money out at a time like this for somebody that is not family is weak in the head.


Spot on - as a professionally trained accountant she'd have done the same if the situation was vice versa plus charged a reasonable rate of interest! cool
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Mar 16, 2009 12:59 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
JayTee
JayTeeJayTeeAuckland, New Zealand3 Threads 35 Posts
you did say X-girlfriend.....didn't you?
confused
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Mar 16, 2009 12:59 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
nothernstar
nothernstarnothernstarMontreal, Quebec Canada11 Threads 341 Posts
rusty_knight: Spot on - as a professionally trained accountant she'd have done the same if the situation was vice versa plus charged a reasonable rate of interest!


that`s Funny rolling on the floor laughing good onethumbs up
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Mar 16, 2009 1:00 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
nothernstar
nothernstarnothernstarMontreal, Quebec Canada11 Threads 341 Posts
JayTee: you did say X-girlfriend.....didn't you?


Yes she moved out.doh
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Mar 16, 2009 1:05 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Drewski
DrewskiDrewskiOlds, Alberta Canada9 Threads 343 Posts
rusty_knight: Spot on - as a professionally trained accountant she'd have done the same if the situation was vice versa plus charged a reasonable rate of interest!


rolling on the floor laughing

Rusty = funny and wise.
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Mar 16, 2009 1:18 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
nothernstar: Yes she moved out.



The best way to understand how a woman could be upset or angry at something...or understand women at all...Is to put yourself in the same situation and see how you would feel...and why...BUT you have to be honest with yourself about it...or it doesn't do any good...and outside of that...ask....wave wink hug kiss hug heart beating
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Mar 16, 2009 1:30 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
rodolpho
rodolphorodolphoamsterdam, North Holland Netherlands30 Threads 3,401 Posts
dont know why u didnt talk first.Its reasonable to sign papers i believe.
But it sounds to me like you ask someone to be married and the answer she got was a prenup without talkin first?
I would be offended too.
But even then i would talk about it.
Still u left out what came first, papers or conversation.
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Mar 16, 2009 1:30 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
Hugz_n_Kissez: The best way to understand how a woman could be upset or angry at something...or understand women at all...Is to put yourself in the same situation and see how you would feel...and why...BUT you have to be honest with yourself about it...or it doesn't do any good...and outside of that...ask....


Ohhhhhhhh and if you're gonna ask...be prepared to listen to what she is saying...I don't mean hear her...I mean really listen...don't discount her feelings...make excuses or tell her why she shouldn't feel the way she does....thumbs up
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Mar 16, 2009 1:33 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
rusty_knight
rusty_knightrusty_knightGozo, Malta175 Threads 2 Polls 6,840 Posts
nothernstar: Yes she moved out.


Jolly good thing too........ if she was spending 110% of her time studying (by the way anything over 100% is impossible so that term freaks me out big time!) then she'd have no tome to clean the place and cook you food and wash your clothes - you'd be paying her to do nothing! laugh

Ok, so above was kidding and of course it would be a pleasure for you to support the woman you love.............. BUT you need some security too..... and once she is a chartered accountant earning big bucks chances are she'll find somebody else who is moving in her new circle of friends and you'd have been left out in the cold anyway - that's life!
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Mar 16, 2009 1:37 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Hugz_n_Kissez
Hugz_n_KissezHugz_n_KissezSomeplace, Ontario Canada59 Threads 2 Polls 25,438 Posts
rusty_knight: Jolly good thing too........ if she was spending 110% of her time studying (by the way anything over 100% is impossible so that term freaks me out big time!) then she'd have no tome to clean the place and cook you food and wash your clothes - you'd be paying her to do nothing!

Ok, so above was kidding and of course it would be a pleasure for you to support the woman you love.............. BUT you need some security too..... and once she is a chartered accountant earning big bucks chances are she'll find somebody else who is moving in her new circle of friends and you'd have been left out in the cold anyway - that's life!




You don't know that...maybe she really loves the man...and I agree there needs to be something in place...BUT it should have been jointly agreed to...This is after all suppose to be a partnership...where both should have input into decision making...wave wink hug kiss hug heart beating
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Mar 16, 2009 1:54 AM CST My X-girlfriend, asked for $60.00cdn. 3 years Education. sing papers I said. Now I'm in the Dog Hou
Drewski
DrewskiDrewskiOlds, Alberta Canada9 Threads 343 Posts
Hugz_n_Kissez: You don't know that...maybe she really loves the man...and I agree there needs to be something in place...BUT it should have been jointly agreed to...This is after all suppose to be a partnership...where both should have input into decision making...


You're right in that she probably loves him however it is not a strong enough love to be forever which this debt, and risk on his part would entail. If I were in the same situation I don't think that any girl in her right mind would lower herself to ask me to outlay that kind of money and still expect to be on equal terms with me nor, would I ever expect any girl to throw me fifty grand and still consider me a man.

This relationship requires time and this event, brought into it by the girl was unfair to the guy. It put him on the spot and, in a situation where nobody should be. On her part, it is a logical solution to her problem as she feels for the guy however, as she reacted by having an immature snit, what are the odds that she had any real conviction and honor about paying him back should the relationship end?

He was wise to require a contract. And, she is unwise for not appreciating his convictions and continuing the relationship while asking his help in doing the task herself with his aid.

Everybody has dreams, few have conviction, honor and even fewer have the ability to fund others dreams.
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