HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHY (38)

I just don't understand why its so hard to find someone that you can be friends, love,hold hands with, be silly with, and spend the rest of your life growing old and loveing eachother? Maybe i am asking for to much?
It feels like i'm in a whole differant world with a new set of rules and alot more head games. Is there anyone looking for that specal someone out here

JMO, sometimes people won't find that someone because they are so busy looking for their fantasy (and might have unrealistic expectations), that they might not see that special someone.

Are the expectations i worte unrealistic? Should i just give up then. The thing i do understand is that not everyone wants the same thing. What i don't understand is why it so hard to find?
I don't beleive its a fantasy i am asking cause if it was i would ask for something differant

I think K was merely giving you an example of how people tend to limit their options when searching for their love connection. Seriously though, how long have you been searching? You have to understand that when something is meant to be, it will happen and when that certain someone is brought to you...then it will happen. It takes a positive attitude and you cannot stop living your life in the real world - that is where that special someone may be! Have patience, have fun, learn about other people and other perspectives and enjoy the socialization...you never know who may be around the corner
JMO, but sometimes we have to wait longer for something true and real to come along - that which is worth waiting for.

I think K was merely giving you an example of how people tend to limit their options when searching for their love connection. Seriously though, how long have you been searching? You have to understand that when something is meant to be, it will happen and when that certain someone is brought to you...then it will happen. It takes a positive attitude and you cannot stop living your life in the real world - that is where that special someone may be! Have patience, have fun, learn about other people and other perspectives and enjoy the socialization...you never know who may be around the corner
JMO, but sometimes we have to wait longer for something true and real to come along - that which is worth waiting for.[/quote\\


I known it was an example, sorry K, didn't mean to come off strong. Its been 11 years i have been searching so patience i think i have that down pat I am new to the internet and before that i was searching bars, meeting people though friends and its sad to see so many women out there hurt, that they are afraid to let people in.I have been hurt before but i have never held it for the next person i date. It would not be fair to her or me.
I have not stoped living my life, and haveing fun but it would be nice to share it with someone too. and yes it will be worth waiting for

The world has changed. I don't think your asking for too much. I would travel if I were you and see that not all attitutes are the same as here. There are places where you are appreciated respected and needed.

Its a supply and demand problem around here.

Bingo.... Eyes!!!

JMO, sometimes people are all for the idea of the special someone, but unconsciously (or unknowingly), have a brick wall that prevents them from finding that someone.

JMO, sometimes a person has to change themselves (heal the wounds from the past) to be able to meet that special someone.

My comment also had to do with watching so many people look for that special someone, but have an idea (list of qualities etc) that they want their special person to have. It's just my point of view, but that list might be unrealistic. It does not mean to just settle. It might be because I do not believe in fairy tales. My special someone is not perfect, but neither am I, but we are perfect for each other, and willing to work at our relationship.

I've seen so many meet someone; their hopes and dreams take over instead of facing reality and what that person really is like. Hurt and disappointment happens, and they get discouraged.

My comments are not made at everyone, but about people that have unrealistic expectations. It's easy to meet people on line, then set in your head what they are like, and then meet them in person and you find they are not what you dreamed up.

I guess in a long winded way I'm trying to say, "BE OPEN MINDED, YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT MIGHT BE RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSE." There are no Prince charmings or Knights in shining armor ... that knight in rusty armor might come with lots of dints, scars and not the most handsome, but he might come with better qualities than expected. Same goes for that queen, or princess...

I agree with you. I have been searching for a long time and I'm definitely not looking for the ideal, just someone to talk to and who will listen and spend time with. I am hoping for someone special to me and finds me special. I don't think that is to hard to ask for.

I was on this site before and found no one and then went on another site and then back to this one. I haven't found that person on either site so am contemplating leaving them both. It sure hasn't helped being on these sites.