Flouncing lessons for Lago (19)

Okay, here is your step by step guide to flouncing.

1. Shout a bit that nobody is paying attention to you.

2. When nobody pays any attention then pout.

3. (this bit is tough s'pecially for you as you have no hair) Get your hair all forward on your face, bend your head towards your chest, then swing your head back while still pouting, raise your right hand and strop over to the door, swing it open and then march out, elegantly of course and do not slam the door, it is never good. Close it gently, the impact is much more when this is undertaken.

4. Go home and pout one a glass of wine and practice dancing in the mirror to the ice skating sketch while everyone talks about you.

5. Drop back later and demand a coffee from yourself and act like nothing has happened and don't forget the shocked incensed look when people state that you flounce.

6. Yes?

Super. Do it a few times, I can recommend hair extensions, this will make it easier for you. Report back when you have perfected this.

<<<<<<<<<Lago with hair extensions....

Never mind admiring yourself in the mirror with your new look, I want reports on how the flouncing is going.

Have a shave will you, I don't like stubble.

Speakingof which, for the last six months, Captain has been sporting a slug above his lip. Tempting as it was to shave it off in his sleep, I resisted the urge.

This time, although it took me an hour to notice when I arrived, all lovely and clean shaven. Slug has gone.

One is most satisfied.

Pout and flounce Lago, pout and flounce.

Slap ya Grossi!...

Look!!.....


<<<<<<<<<<<<<


...there goes another fart!!.....

You're just quite crass aren't you?

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...do you know what that was??...do you??...

...that was a boring little fart FLOUNCING across the page...

...how dare he!!...

I can't say it was that obvious Lago, to me anyway. It looked like a couple of emoticons to me. But good job old boy.