The 11th Husband (14)
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druidess6308: The 11th Husband!!!
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin."
"What ?" said the puzzled groom.
"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how g reat it was going to be.
"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.
"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
" Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
"Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
"Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
.
"Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was........... God I miss him !!.
.
"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".
"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why ?
"You're with the " GOVERNMENT ". .
This time I KNOW I'M gonna getSCREWED."
A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin."
"What ?" said the puzzled groom.
"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how g reat it was going to be.
"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.
"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
" Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
"Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
"Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
.
"Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was........... God I miss him !!.
.
"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".
"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why ?
"You're with the " GOVERNMENT ". .
This time I KNOW I'M gonna getSCREWED."
And likely without getting kissed.
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Made my nite.
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wonderworker: And likely without getting kissed.
Likely you're right. Probably bent her over and didn't even use Vaseline...but at least she got screwed finally.------ This thread is Archived ------
HDALE: Made my nite.
Thanks, HD...I laughed pretty hard when I read it, so I thought I'd share a good laugh before I signed off. 
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Too funny!------ This thread is Archived ------
Sasyecat: Too funny!
Welcome to the nut house! Lots of newbies around tonight...good to see you joining in!
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I remember this joke when it consisted only of a psychiatrist, a gynecologist, the stamp collector and the lawyer is now replaced by the government... ahhh... how things change 
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I settle for husbands #10 and #11
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Created: Jul 2009
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A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin."
"What ?" said the puzzled groom.
"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how g reat it was going to be.
"Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.
"Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
" Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
"Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
"Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.
"Husband #8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.
"Husband #9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.
.
"Husband #10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was........... God I miss him !!.
.
"But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".
"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why ?
"You're with the " GOVERNMENT ". .
This time I KNOW I'M gonna getSCREWED."