Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness?? ( Archived) (20)

Jan 11, 2010 9:38 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxynite69
sxynite69sxynite69Greensboro, North Carolina USA4 Threads 259 Posts
A few months ago I met someone and fell in love with him. During our first few weeks together he told me he was ill. He has a brain tumor and believes he will not see this Christmas. I can't help that I fell in love with him and it's bad timing. I believe things like this happen for a reason and I will love him until the end. It will be hard....and for my children as well. So my question is....would you date or marry someone terminally ill? Why or why not? I welcome any point of view.
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Jan 11, 2010 9:40 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxc666
sxc666sxc666unknown, Queensland Australia51 Threads 16,853 Posts
Personally I don't think there is a simple yes or no answer.


Love is Love.

Attraction is attraction.


Each individual would probably react differently wine
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Jan 11, 2010 9:42 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
jennkait2002
jennkait2002jennkait2002Culpeper, Virginia USA2 Posts
I think that that is something only a person in the situation could truely answer. It is hard to say who you are going to fall in love with and why is it right to give up on that just because someone is sick. You could give up on it and that person live for many years after the Dr.'s predict. I say if you love them go for it. Yes it will be hard, but wouldn't be hard to live with out them when they are here and you just give up. Don't let the Dr's be the judge of your happiness.
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Jan 11, 2010 9:42 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Lostrebel
LostrebelLostrebelHeuvelton, New York USA9 Threads 661 Posts
sxynite69: A few months ago I met someone and fell in love with him. During our first few weeks together he told me he was ill. He has a brain tumor and believes he will not see this Christmas. I can't help that I fell in love with him and it's bad timing. I believe things like this happen for a reason and I will love him until the end. It will be hard....and for my children as well. So my question is....would you date or marry someone terminally ill? Why or why not? I welcome any point of view.
ya know...love the person not whats right with them..or wrong ...dunno
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Jan 11, 2010 9:43 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxynite69
sxynite69sxynite69Greensboro, North Carolina USA4 Threads 259 Posts
Good point on view...thank you. I know I'm in for some rough days....and so is he. He's in so much pain as it is.
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Jan 11, 2010 9:50 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxynite69
sxynite69sxynite69Greensboro, North Carolina USA4 Threads 259 Posts
I'm pretty sure there is no cut and dry answer....but I'm wondering how well I can prepare myself and my 5 girls at home. We've discussed it but at the same time...HOW do I prepare them? What things do I say or do so they are ready?
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Jan 11, 2010 9:58 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Lostrebel
LostrebelLostrebelHeuvelton, New York USA9 Threads 661 Posts
sxynite69: I'm pretty sure there is no cut and dry answer....but I'm wondering how well I can prepare myself and my 5 girls at home. We've discussed it but at the same time...HOW do I prepare them? What things do I say or do so they are ready?
simply tell them the truth....kids and people in general can handle things better this way ...just be honestdunno
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Jan 11, 2010 10:00 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Raven0
Raven0Raven0Right here, Alberta Canada28 Threads 3,454 Posts
sxc666: Personally I don't think there is a simple yes or no answer.Love is Love.

Attraction is attraction.Each individual would probably react differently

I agree with this assement.thumbs up
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Jan 11, 2010 10:04 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
ogdensburgbabe
ogdensburgbabeogdensburgbabeogdensburg, New York USA18 Threads 801 Posts
sxynite69: A few months ago I met someone and fell in love with him. During our first few weeks together he told me he was ill. He has a brain tumor and believes he will not see this Christmas. I can't help that I fell in love with him and it's bad timing. I believe things like this happen for a reason and I will love him until the end. It will be hard....and for my children as well. So my question is....would you date or marry someone terminally ill? Why or why not? I welcome any point of view.



Yes. If I loved them.

Depends a little on whether they told me before we got together, but my decisions would still be based on whether I loved them or not.

handshake
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Jan 11, 2010 10:06 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Odysseus101
Odysseus101Odysseus101Roma, Lazio Italy46 Threads 12 Polls 925 Posts
That's a tough one. But I have to say, a lot of people would walk away from it, but you stay. Maybe because you love him now, and it's too hard to walk away. I think once you are in love with a person, it would be very hard to turn away. I'm not sure if I could do it either. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did. On the other hand, you are in for a very rough ride. But we all are, aren't we? In the end. I think to watch someone you love die, must be the most difficult thing. Maybe it's even as difficult as dying itself? I wish you strength. hug
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Jan 11, 2010 10:07 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxc666
sxc666sxc666unknown, Queensland Australia51 Threads 16,853 Posts
sxynite69: I'm pretty sure there is no cut and dry answer....but I'm wondering how well I can prepare myself and my 5 girls at home. We've discussed it but at the same time...HOW do I prepare them? What things do I say or do so they are ready?
I think being open and honest with them is the best way.

There are ways to explain, in a way they understand. Take them on the journey with you, include them.

Kids are smarter than you think, and will love you for your honesty.

Good luck wine
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Jan 11, 2010 10:08 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxc666
sxc666sxc666unknown, Queensland Australia51 Threads 16,853 Posts
Lostrebel: simply tell them the truth....kids and people in general can handle things better this way ...just be honest
Yes I agree.wine
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Jan 11, 2010 10:09 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Lostrebel
LostrebelLostrebelHeuvelton, New York USA9 Threads 661 Posts
sxc666: I think being open and honest with them is the best way.

There are ways to explain, in a way they understand. Take them on the journey with you, include them.

Kids are smarter than you think, and will love you for your honesty.

Good luck
exactly...wine
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Jan 11, 2010 10:10 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
HJFinAZ
HJFinAZHJFinAZSun CIty, Arizona USA870 Threads 1 Polls 17,068 Posts
"NONE" of us will get out alive..wink
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Jan 11, 2010 10:11 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
lovely4u7da
lovely4u7dalovely4u7dachicago, Illinois USA32 Threads 1,337 Posts
You answer the question for me
I would date someone with a terminal illness
because I believe in the power of faith
and you can not help who you fall in love with
My prayers will be with you and your love ones for a miracle
Love will make a blind man talk about seeing again
Love is a miracle in its self angel comfort
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Jan 11, 2010 10:13 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
tina_olson
tina_olsontina_olsonWestby, Wisconsin USA1 Threads 694 Posts
sxc666: Personally I don't think there is a simple yes or no answer.Love is Love.

Attraction is attraction.Each individual would probably react differently


I agree with you...I took care of my ex-sister-in-law the last 4 months of her life after a 2 year battle with a tumor in her brain--she went through 5 surgeries and a lot of hell but she always stayed strong...It was the hardest thing I think I ever had to do--watch someone you love die (especially at a young age) but if I had to do it again..I would...
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Jan 11, 2010 10:15 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
rubyfruit
rubyfruitrubyfruitMICHIGAN, Michigan USA2 Threads 456 Posts
yes i would you love them no matter what its in your heart
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Jan 11, 2010 10:31 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
In response to: A few months ago I met someone and fell in love with him. During our first few weeks together he told me he was ill. He has a brain tumor and believes he will not see this Christmas. I can't help that I fell in love with him and it's bad timing. I believe things like this happen for a reason and I will love him until the end. It will be hard....and for my children as well. So my question is....would you date or marry someone terminally ill? Why or why not? I welcome any point of view.



Would I date/marry someone if I knew they had a terminal illness?

I really don't know.
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Jan 12, 2010 8:38 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
sxynite69
sxynite69sxynite69Greensboro, North Carolina USA4 Threads 259 Posts
tina_olson: I agree with you...I took care of my ex-sister-in-law the last 4 months of her life after a 2 year battle with a tumor in her brain--she went through 5 surgeries and a lot of hell but she always stayed strong...It was the hardest thing I think I ever had to do--watch someone you love die (especially at a young age) but if I had to do it again..I would...


Thank you Tina. He actually has a brain tumor so you know what I'm going through and how bad it can get. Thank you. He was diagnosed in September and they say he's already had it about 1 1/2 years. He's in the 3rd stage and even though I wish there were a miracle about to happen I know what science says.

I have spoken with my girls in depth and listen to their concerns as well as holding them while they cried. I think we'll have a few more tears in the future....but I'm not leaving him. Thank you all for your insight.
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Jan 12, 2010 10:24 PM CST Would you date someone knowing they had a terminal illness??
Shirley49WV
Shirley49WVShirley49WVMason, West Virginia USA27 Threads 2,449 Posts
sxynite69: Thank you Tina. He actually has a brain tumor so you know what I'm going through and how bad it can get. Thank you. He was diagnosed in September and they say he's already had it about 1 1/2 years. He's in the 3rd stage and even though I wish there were a miracle about to happen I know what science says.

I have spoken with my girls in depth and listen to their concerns as well as holding them while they cried. I think we'll have a few more tears in the future....but I'm not leaving him. Thank you all for your insight.


I think your a very kind and caring woman to stay with him. I myself could not turn my back or fall out of love due to an illness. I wish you and your family many good times with him.
I used to live in Greensboro and was a major fan of the Monarchs.

comfort hug
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