Wouldn't things be easier if America did.......... ( Archived) (17)

Just in case anyone missed this......

WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S. PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN, GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?



'My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has been completed.

Since Congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.

This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.


Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short . The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.

The other list contains every one not on the first list. Most of the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this evening.

Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war. THEN EVERY YEAR THEREAFTER It'll GO TO OUR SOCIAL SECURITY SYSTEM SO IT WONT GO BROKE IN 20 YEARS.

The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world Hell holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine ? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France .

In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.

Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France or maybe China .

I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France , and Russia . Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.

I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.

A special note to our neighbors: Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.

Mexico is also on List 2. Its president and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple thousand extra tanks and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put 'em? Yep, border security.

Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty - starting now.

We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be drilling for oil in Alaska -which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, 'darn tootin.'

Continued...
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America . It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thank you guys. We owe you and we won't forget.

To the nations on List 2, a final thought : You might want to learn to speak Arabic.

God bless America .. Thank you and good night.'

If you can read this in English, thank a soldier.

Was this written by some pre-teen on crack who missed at least 75% of his schooling?

Just how uninformed are people? That's what the US is doing now. Invading countries for oil and forcing countries into unfavourable (for them) trade deals is how the US plans to stay top of the heap.

And anyone who "thinks" Alaskan oil will solve the US's demand for it hasn't passed grade 5 math. The maximum estimate of oil in Alaska is 16 billion barrels and the US uses 20 million barrels of oil per day.

Let's be generous and say the US cuts consumption in half to 10 million. Sixteen billion of reseves divided by 10 million used is 1600 days of oil. That's four years and five months. Only an idiot who can't count considers that a "long term solution".

(2008)03.pdf

good one again, you know America,

Well I know facts, and what is written there has nothing to do with facts.

Yeah i say that it is time to end the babysitting. We need to start looking after our own instead of breaking our neck to help those who are not really thankful for it.

Second i agree with the statement you made that we should stop pouring money into third world **** holes and like you i agree that every terroist should be hunted down like the dogs they are and they should be dealt with. Furthermore like you i do believe that we need tougher border security and if that means deploying a few military regiments to help with the task i say go for it.

I say America needs to look out for ITS OWN before it goes giving handouts to others.