What Would You Do? ( Archived) (17)

I was living with my gf for the last year. I don't have full custody now of both my kids,ages 10 and 11. Me and my gf broke up about 5days ago and my ex gf put a restraining order on me to get me and the kids out of the apt. Her name was the only one on the lease so guess who had to go. I had 20min to decide what items I was going to need. It was a hard decision I wasn't nowhere ready to make. I had a friend who let us stay there for a few days,but then told us we had to leave...I forgot to add one more bit of info...I have been unemployed for the last year due to the economy and the company I was working for let go of alot of people My unemployment ran out on April 5th,2010. I have my kids the first half of the Summer,my ex gets them the 2nd half. When this happened alot of friend suggested that I give the kids to the ex til I get more stabilized...problem is that the ex wouldn't let me see the kids if I turned them over. Unfortunately she is just like that and has always been that way despite having full custody now. I have committed to do whatever I can to keep the kids til July 16th which is the 2nd half of the Summer. So,anyway the question is what would you do,give the kids to an ex who only wants to take them from you and never give them back or be the parent you always have been and do whatever you can to take care of them...I mean it isn't like there aren't other parents out there going thru hard times and not struggling.

JMO

Let her keep the kids for the first half and try to pull yourself from the bootstraps and get a job, a place to leave and some stability. Then you can have (demand to have) the kids stay with you. Tough situation; hope it works out well for you.

You have to think of the kids first,i know you love them but they need to ne in a stabile home.When you get back on your feet,get a lawyer if you have to to get your kids vistation rights back if she causes a problem...just my opinion,good luck alot of people are out of work right now!

Happens to alot of people, she will be crazy emotional for a while so i'd advise you as a man to f'k your pride and give her some space and time.
In the mean time get some legal advice so you know how to deal with this if she indeed does continue to restrain your access.
End of the day as long as your not violent or threatening, but law you will get custody.
Maybe not 50/50 but close to it. Its funny how some women turn when a relationship falls apart...crazy stuff

It sickens my heart when people assume it is the woman who makes all the sacrifices ...

Hats off to all you nurturing single pops

I brought my children up alone because the ex was a waste of space but there are thousands of single dads out there.....



There are organisations for single parents In the UK it is called ''Ginger Bread'' I didn't ever need their support as I had a good net work of friends who helped me.....

Dont be alone find what is out there for you...you never know you may even meet a female single parent who Loves her family and yours

Again Good Luck honey

I'm sorry for you, it's tough. Unfortunately there is no solution I can give you. Sounds like you're in a big jam and you're gonna need more than advice to get out of it.
But if I was in your shoes, I'd give her the kids and forget about it. In time, the children will learn about it all and understand what situation you were in. Then they shall want to spend more time with you and you'll be able to enjoy their company without being strapped for cash.
Life is unfair for sure, but don't put your kids in the same situation you're in.
JMO

My opinion you should get some legal advice about handing the kids over to a more stable enviroment, and then see about getting visitation...you would be doing the right thing, and you
need to be recognized for it, and get yourself together and if you believe they are such an important part of your life, you'll do whatever it takes to prove to be a stable enviroment also