Cold feet, sabatage or.... (130)
No takers 
suppose everyone is preoccupied with arguing on another thread today 
suppose everyone is preoccupied with arguing on another thread today ------ This thread is Archived ------
I think if we get a gut feeling we should listen to it 
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Sometimes, no matter how often we talk with someone over the net, on the phone, write letters, send smoke signals, whatever, when it comes to the actual meet-up, we just FREEZE!
Spend so long building our hopes up that we don't want to disappoint ourselves or the other person...but if we wanna be "grown-ups", we should just go in with a positive attitude and only show our nervousness through snorting coffee (or other liquid) out or nose at a totally inappropriate moment, laugh and have fun!
Spend so long building our hopes up that we don't want to disappoint ourselves or the other person...but if we wanna be "grown-ups", we should just go in with a positive attitude and only show our nervousness through snorting coffee (or other liquid) out or nose at a totally inappropriate moment, laugh and have fun!
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venusenvy: I think if we get a gut feeling we should listen to it
This is true, especially if both people have that "gut feeling"
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amahlala: Sometimes, no matter how often we talk with someone over the net, on the phone, write letters, send smoke signals, whatever, when it comes to the actual meet-up, we just FREEZE!
Spend so long building our hopes up that we don't want to disappoint ourselves or the other person...but if we wanna be "grown-ups", we should just go in with a positive attitude and only show our nervousness through snorting coffee (or other liquid) out or nose at a totally inappropriate moment, laugh and have fun!
Spend so long building our hopes up that we don't want to disappoint ourselves or the other person...but if we wanna be "grown-ups", we should just go in with a positive attitude and only show our nervousness through snorting coffee (or other liquid) out or nose at a totally inappropriate moment, laugh and have fun!
Very well said and oh so true
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I personnally think one should never look at it as a "date".This puts pressure on straight away.To me,it should just be meeting for a coffee,as you would a friend,and then relax,and if something happens in the future,fine.If not,then you have someone to have a coffee with,as and when.
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hello intrigued,
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
------ This thread is Archived ------
2intrigued: Considering a potential relationship with someone you've met
online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
I like this post.
I am relatively new here and looking for someone after 10 years of singledom. I started corresponding with someone who "said" he was in the military and "said" he was overseas. I really liked what I heard about him...his life, his hopes for the future, etc. But...some things weren't adding up.
My first thought after confronting him about the discrepencies..."am I just sabotaging my chances at potential happiness because I'm afraid?" The baggage many of us come with is sometimes heavier than we even thought...and those little voices inside our skulls just keep getting louder and louder. Exactly what happened with me.
Yes, I have been out of a relationship for a long time. Yes, I am comfortable with my life (but...comfort can sometimes equate to loneliness and I am no longer comfortable being lonely)...
NO...distance is not an issue and I am definitely NOT into playing games (you reach a certain age where those games should be behind you).
I definitely do not want to get hurt again so will approach any possible relationship with a bit of caution. (OK, maybe more than a bit).
Regardless of whether or not he was telling the truth, I found I could not take the chance of falling hard for his online personna only to find out he was a player or a poser. Does that mean I'm purposely sabotaging my chances at future happiness? I don't think so but (if he is legit and I screwed it all up) he probably does.
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2intrigued: Very well said and oh so true
Hey 2I
I have no comment.... Have only just woken up....and my brain not functioning properly yet...
Just read that "other" thread....and its all a bit much
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lucynad: hello intrigued,
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
I'm very open to meeting someone I connect with but sometimes it's a distance thing or the other party just isn't sending the "interest" vibes
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lucynad: hello intrigued,
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
i find it hard to answer as i'm the opposite...
if i get along well with some one i want to meet asap...
i'm not fond of emailing back and forth
and
i'm a risk taker by nature...
------ This thread is Archived ------
kymbie67: I like this post.
I am relatively new here and looking for someone after 10 years of singledom. I started corresponding with someone who "said" he was in the military and "said" he was overseas. I really liked what I heard about him...his life, his hopes for the future, etc. But...some things weren't adding up.
My first thought after confronting him about the discrepencies..."am I just sabotaging my chances at potential happiness because I'm afraid?" The baggage many of us come with is sometimes heavier than we even thought...and those little voices inside our skulls just keep getting louder and louder. Exactly what happened with me.
Yes, I have been out of a relationship for a long time. Yes, I am comfortable with my life (but...comfort can sometimes equate to loneliness and I am no longer comfortable being lonely)...
NO...distance is not an issue and I am definitely NOT into playing games (you reach a certain age where those games should be behind you).
I definitely do not want to get hurt again so will approach any possible relationship with a bit of caution. (OK, maybe more than a bit).
Regardless of whether or not he was telling the truth, I found I could not take the chance of falling hard for his online personna only to find out he was a player or a poser. Does that mean I'm purposely sabotaging my chances at future happiness? I don't think so but (if he is legit and I screwed it all up) he probably does.
I am relatively new here and looking for someone after 10 years of singledom. I started corresponding with someone who "said" he was in the military and "said" he was overseas. I really liked what I heard about him...his life, his hopes for the future, etc. But...some things weren't adding up.
My first thought after confronting him about the discrepencies..."am I just sabotaging my chances at potential happiness because I'm afraid?" The baggage many of us come with is sometimes heavier than we even thought...and those little voices inside our skulls just keep getting louder and louder. Exactly what happened with me.
Yes, I have been out of a relationship for a long time. Yes, I am comfortable with my life (but...comfort can sometimes equate to loneliness and I am no longer comfortable being lonely)...
NO...distance is not an issue and I am definitely NOT into playing games (you reach a certain age where those games should be behind you).
I definitely do not want to get hurt again so will approach any possible relationship with a bit of caution. (OK, maybe more than a bit).
Regardless of whether or not he was telling the truth, I found I could not take the chance of falling hard for his online personna only to find out he was a player or a poser. Does that mean I'm purposely sabotaging my chances at future happiness? I don't think so but (if he is legit and I screwed it all up) he probably does.
I think you should have taken it a little further, and given him the beefit of the doubt, it may have turned out of for you
------ This thread is Archived ------
2intrigued: Considering a potential relationship with someone you've met
online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
oooooh...i don't get cold feet...online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
...i had ice blocks on my feet, at first.. ...there were some other issues that i wont go into...it had nothing to do with leigh...it was a worry of being a disappointment to her...i geuss everybody would have worrys about it, at first...i think it only natural...especially with the online thing...like i said in mine and leighs thread, i did'nt really believe in the online thing...but after corresponding with leigh, it became very apparent to me and her that it was something that HAD to be done...because it would've been something i and she would have wondered about for the rest of our lives...but yea, i think you're right about people being their own worst enemy in matters of the heart...but if the feelings are strong enough, any worrys or doubts can be over come with love...and i'm not talking about any one sided love...when love IS love, you both will know it, and feel it...and when you do feel that, there's nothing that could keep you from it...it is something you have to do, the meet ...it is something you NEED to do...and any fears can be over come...any at all....
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kymbie67: I like this post.
I am relatively new here and looking for someone after 10 years of singledom. I started corresponding with someone who "said" he was in the military and "said" he was overseas. I really liked what I heard about him...his life, his hopes for the future, etc. But...some things weren't adding up.
My first thought after confronting him about the discrepencies..."am I just sabotaging my chances at potential happiness because I'm afraid?" The baggage many of us come with is sometimes heavier than we even thought...and those little voices inside our skulls just keep getting louder and louder. Exactly what happened with me.
Yes, I have been out of a relationship for a long time. Yes, I am comfortable with my life (but...comfort can sometimes equate to loneliness and I am no longer comfortable being lonely)...
NO...distance is not an issue and I am definitely NOT into playing games (you reach a certain age where those games should be behind you).
I definitely do not want to get hurt again so will approach any possible relationship with a bit of caution. (OK, maybe more than a bit).
Regardless of whether or not he was telling the truth, I found I could not take the chance of falling hard for his online personna only to find out he was a player or a poser. Does that mean I'm purposely sabotaging my chances at future happiness? I don't think so but (if he is legit and I screwed it all up) he probably does.
I am relatively new here and looking for someone after 10 years of singledom. I started corresponding with someone who "said" he was in the military and "said" he was overseas. I really liked what I heard about him...his life, his hopes for the future, etc. But...some things weren't adding up.
My first thought after confronting him about the discrepencies..."am I just sabotaging my chances at potential happiness because I'm afraid?" The baggage many of us come with is sometimes heavier than we even thought...and those little voices inside our skulls just keep getting louder and louder. Exactly what happened with me.
Yes, I have been out of a relationship for a long time. Yes, I am comfortable with my life (but...comfort can sometimes equate to loneliness and I am no longer comfortable being lonely)...
NO...distance is not an issue and I am definitely NOT into playing games (you reach a certain age where those games should be behind you).
I definitely do not want to get hurt again so will approach any possible relationship with a bit of caution. (OK, maybe more than a bit).
Regardless of whether or not he was telling the truth, I found I could not take the chance of falling hard for his online personna only to find out he was a player or a poser. Does that mean I'm purposely sabotaging my chances at future happiness? I don't think so but (if he is legit and I screwed it all up) he probably does.
Very well said and so true. I've noticed a lot of the military and widowed men are often times a scammer
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venusenvy: I think if we get a gut feeling we should listen to it
I dont get "GUT" feelings, but sometimes in spring I do get a "RUT" feeling!!.------ This thread is Archived ------
2intrigued: Considering a potential relationship with someone you've met
online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
hi ..a good question....if i said i,d meet you tomorrow......who would back out first.....you/me....?????online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?
------ This thread is Archived ------
tomcatwarne: I think you should have taken it a little further, and given him the beefit of the doubt, it may have turned out of for you
It's not totally about me but relationships in general and a common experience realized by many here...
As for me, I give him the benefit of the doubt but sometimes the hook is dull
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trueheart1941: hi ..a good question....if i said i,d meet you tomorrow......who would back out first.....you/me....?????
Thats an unfair question, you are bloody ugly!!------ This thread is Archived ------
I think to take appropriate time by letters and phone, and if it feels good, I am not scared by it...But Maybe kinda nervous at first, I did go to Germany to meet someone last year, Tho in the end it didnt work out, what I did learn is that Immigration Laws Suck, and thats why I dont persue others out of My country anymore, a hard lesson, so If You live in a different country and I dont write, this is probably why! Sad to say, but I learned it the hard way... but to each their own...
One day my Dream will come true..
so I walk in Peace...
One day my Dream will come true..
so I walk in Peace...
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Created: Mar 2011
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online...you've chatted, you both seem to get along very well and it's time to discuss a possible meeting...
Are you the type to get cold feet when the time comes to finally meet face to face?
Sometimes WE are our own worst enemy in our relationships. Are we
afraid of getting hurt again or disappointing other people or living beneath our ideal relationship standard? Maybe we’ve been out of a relationship for too long or have gotten too comfortable in our current lifestyle. Is it a distance issue or maybe even a game?
There are probably hundreds of reasons.....what are your thoughts on why some people might sabotage their chances of ever meeting someone?