How Much (19)
serene56Myplace, New South Wales Australia543 Threads 10 Polls 27,954 Postsdoes our childhood shape our future 
Well I think having good childhood helps alot.
benidorm: Well I think having good childhood helps alot.
Hi beni
and what if it was not so good
serene56: Hi beni and what if it was not so good
If it was not so good, a person will carry the memoryof the trauma always. They have to think beyond that and leave
it what it is....a memory.
pedalguy59: If it was not so good, a person will carry the memory
of the trauma always. They have to think beyond that and leave
it what it is....a memory.
of the trauma always. They have to think beyond that and leave
it what it is....a memory.
So therapy does not have a place
serene56: So therapy does not have a place
Therapy is not magic, it only brings up the memoriesfor realisation. Some of us dealt with the memories, and removed
blame. For me it was an archaic English school system, which was
the worst memories I have ever had. I probably have a stronger
character, because I dealt with it. Alas some people have had
horrific childhood traumas, that only therapy can possible help.
serene56: So therapy does not have a place
before therapy can work the person has to allow themselves to move forward not stay in the pain/memory. Therapy can help with that but the person still has to want to move forward.
Moving forward can be moving into the unknown, some will stay with the pain of the past because at least is a known quantity.
Torless: I am not sure of the equation, but the environment the children are in plays a huge part. What chance does a child have? Now here they are trying to intervene in poverty situations, by for exmaple having mentor role models, guys who give their time to encourage boys, who otherwise would have no contact with any male role model. They are also trying to feed children at school in poor areas, as some are really struggling.what do they do in Oz?
Way back in the 60s when I was at school and we were doing the IQ testing stuff, my teacher made a reference to a guy from Africa who had an IQ off the scale. He could not read or write. But show him something and he knew it forever.
Our "environment" teaches us many things. And then it is up to us to accept, deny or adapt the many things we are taught. We alone make that choice.
In response to: does our childhood shape our future
Have to agree everyone handles life differently. One things for certain we all have our crosses to bear. Some have it tougher than others and many have good reason to drop their bundle. Others appear to have a charmed life but cannot cope with one thing or another.
Resilience is, I believe, the key to handling what live throws at us. We must build this in childhood. Those that may have it tough may learn to be stronger and can handle life's knocks better. Others appear strong and hide behind walls of emotional fragility.
Some that have never had to face adversity don't know how to cope when they are confronted with tragedy. It's all relative to what you know, what gets thrown your way, how you see those around you deal with problems and your personality.
If you need help and counselling offers you some hope, then for God sake, go for it.
Look after yourself first and then others will be there to help you through as well.
LiLee: Have to agree everyone handles life differently. One things for certain we all have our crosses to bear. Some have it tougher than others and many have good reason to drop their bundle. Others appear to have a charmed life but cannot cope with one thing or another.
Resilience is, I believe, the key to handling what live throws at us. We must build this in childhood. Those that may have it tough may learn to be stronger and can handle life's knocks better. Others appear strong and hide behind walls of emotional fragility.
Some that have never had to face adversity don't know how to cope when they are confronted with tragedy. It's all relative to what you know, what gets thrown your way, how you see those around you deal with problems and your personality.
If you need help and counselling offers you some hope, then for God sake, go for it.
Look after yourself first and then others will be there to help you through as well.
Resilience is, I believe, the key to handling what live throws at us. We must build this in childhood. Those that may have it tough may learn to be stronger and can handle life's knocks better. Others appear strong and hide behind walls of emotional fragility.
Some that have never had to face adversity don't know how to cope when they are confronted with tragedy. It's all relative to what you know, what gets thrown your way, how you see those around you deal with problems and your personality.
If you need help and counselling offers you some hope, then for God sake, go for it.
Look after yourself first and then others will be there to help you through as well.
Good post Lilee, was thinking along the same lines today - about some parents and their 'cotton wool' approach to kids?
It's like they think they are doing the best thing by shielding their kids from anything negative?
But for me I wonder how those kids are going to cope when they realise what the real world is like?
I think it is smarter to teach kids that not everyone thinks they are the best thing since sliced bread, there are some horrible people out there, life is not going to be a fairytale for us all - so get used to it, toughen up!
wash2u: Way back in the 60s when I was at school and we were doing the IQ testing stuff, my teacher made a reference to a guy from Africa who had an IQ off the scale. He could not read or write. But show him something and he knew it forever.
Our "environment" teaches us many things. And then it is up to us to accept, deny or adapt the many things we are taught. We alone make that choice.
Our "environment" teaches us many things. And then it is up to us to accept, deny or adapt the many things we are taught. We alone make that choice.
hmm I hear you wash, but kids cant sometimes do that, even some adults grown up moulded in a bad environment cant. If they get a hand up, they sometimes can.
Interesting story about Africasn boy, hmm he must have had some bright people around him talking or showing him things..intersting....sometimes people survive no matter what, and thrive..and thats good when that happens.Makes you wonder how they did sometimes?
serene56: does our childhood shape our future
A. Lots.
I really like the truth that has been made famous in the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"
' Don't let your past dictate who you are, but let it be a part of who you will become '.
This is reality and truth. Our past is a part of who we are, and it influences who we become.
Torless: hmm I hear you wash, but kids cant sometimes do that, even some adults grown up moulded in a bad environment cant. If they get a hand up, they sometimes can.
Interesting story about Africasn boy, hmm he must have had some bright people around him talking or showing him things..intersting....sometimes people survive no matter what, and thrive..and thats good when that happens.Makes you wonder how they did sometimes?
Interesting story about Africasn boy, hmm he must have had some bright people around him talking or showing him things..intersting....sometimes people survive no matter what, and thrive..and thats good when that happens.Makes you wonder how they did sometimes?
Friend of my brother, Jimmy. When he was early teens (mid 60s), his parents decided that they wanted to go back to Germany to live. Gave the much older brother the house and left him in his care. Jimmy ended up what was called a 'tearaway' back. Loved hotting up cars, mixing it with the "rockers" & "bodgies" and even got a girl pregnant. Her parents did not want a bar of him after that.
His brother ended up kicking him out when he started his own family and Jimmy ended up at our place. For a while. He got nabbed for stealing a car - he actually returned the car to the owner who dobbed him in. He spent 2 years in jail. Also meant we had to dispose of a couple of his spare cars he had down the back of our place as we weren't sure of their history.
And came back a changed man. He bought a tug boat and then set himself up doing the shark nets off Sydney and fishing charters. Still does this today. And has a farm out of Nyngan as well.
People can change if they really want to.
I always wanted to be a millionaire.
Until I found out that I had to "work" to be one
Hi all.
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
Nature123: Hi all.
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
Good post...
Nature123: Hi all.
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
Depends on how strong the person is,
Some people that have had violence and neglect all their life can go on to be great people,
Some on the other hand use it as an excuse,(yer but I grew up with dad punching mum) yes that is horrible but no excuse to use violence,or dad done it to mum and she never answered back.yet again an excuse,
Some people carry the scars of violence with them all their lives and just carnt move on.
It is a sad world that we live in,well for some people,
But what they need to realise is there is always some one out there worse off then they are,
So somehow knowing there are people worse off than you makes your experience somehow better?
Hey we all have to make decision,some times that is taken away from us and bad things happen,
But we all have a path to walk,depends on what path you want to take the good one or the bad one,
No matter where you come from you can be and do what ever you want,
But we all have a path to walk,depends on what path you want to take the good one or the bad one,
No matter where you come from you can be and do what ever you want,
AgentAjax: So somehow knowing there are people worse off than you makes your experience somehow better?
No not at all, the majority of cases there are people out there that are worse off,
And if one wants to dwell on their misfortune then so be it,they will get no where.
Thank you torless
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