need advice ( Archived) (55)

54xmax: It is all about his EGO. - - - - His manhood is tied to being able to have a woman under control, to be able to have her dance to his tune. His EGO is tied to playing, and that a woman is ready, and willing to buy his BS.

He obviously has low self esteem, and you are there to caress his ego and lift his self-esteem. He cannot stand, you finding someone better, and actually figuring out, that he is a schmuck. That he has no balls, nor that he actually is a "man" - - - Him being a bachelor, not stepping up. The way he is behaving, I'd guess, that he is also Pisces, Libra or Twins in zodiac sign - - Star sign or maybe in moon or rising sign - - He definitely has one of these in his stars.

He is weak person whom does not know what he wants, and it is about time for you to decide, what you want, what you deserve and where do you wish to go. He is only holding you back.

Wake up, and move on. - - This on and off - - Come on, how old are you two. Are you teen agers - - or are you two suppose to be adults, mature people with intellect and somewhat clear desires and dreams for the future. . . . You might be missing out a good man whom is right next to you, but he has not got any chance with you, because you can't decide what you want.

lilsweetnsassy: the the friends who do mutually know us have told him to step up, and have told me to tell him to grow up and make a decision. Obviously he is a great guy or I wouldn't have been friends with him for 9 years. Everything i say here i would say to his face or have said to his face. He is a great guy, just won't step up, and immature. So :) thanks

In response to: Okay so I need advice, I have been friends with this guy whom I will call J for the past nine years. He was one of my really good friends. When my husband at I split J and I talked a few times but I needed time to heal, to find myself again. That was five years ago. For the past year and a half he and I have dated off and on. My problem is he doesn't seem to want to step up. He is a bachelor, likes to go out with friends. Never invites me. But then again that's not my lifestyle, he knows that. I dont have a problem with him going out, my problem was I felt I was a convince. He rarely would text back, and only hung out with me when he was done partying. He says it wasn't like that. My thoughts are if he is not going to step up i am going to date other people. He gets upset. When im with someone else he calls me tells me he loves me, how bad it hurts im with someone else. But when i try again with him its the same. He has not dated anyone in the past year and a half but me. But it's like he only wants me when im with someone else, or suddenly realizes he could lose me. I dont know what to do. Im tired of games. I dont know how to get him to step up, and i can't be with him if he dont. Any advice would be helpful.