To Fall in Love - do this (11)
Tinypawsunknown, Longford Ireland16 Threads 1 Polls 339 PostsVery interesting read this extremely long link leads to 
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/modern-love-to-fall-in-love-with-anyone-do-this.html?smid=fb-nytimes&smtyp=pay&bicmp=AD&bicmlukp=WT.mc_id&bicmst=1409232722000&bicmet=1419773522000&kwp_0=7760&_r=0
Tinypaws: Very interesting read this extremely long link leads to
I can't paste that on this iPad,
Tell me what to google.
,Falling in love can be mistaken for falling in lust,
Infatuation can have same symptoms as falling in love,
I've had a man tell me he loved me after two weeks the relationship lasted only 3 months and that love thing was in fact infatuation ,
Infatuation can have same symptoms as falling in love,
I've had a man tell me he loved me after two weeks the relationship lasted only 3 months and that love thing was in fact infatuation ,
peachmelba: Falling in love can be mistaken for falling in lust,
Infatuation can have same symptoms as falling in love,
I've had a man tell me he loved me after two weeks the relationship lasted only 3 months and that love thing was in fact infatuation ,
Infatuation can have same symptoms as falling in love,
I've had a man tell me he loved me after two weeks the relationship lasted only 3 months and that love thing was in fact infatuation ,
Very true peach
Hiya Tiny, 
I read the link.
You basically have to spend a good bit of time with a stranger and answer 36 increasingly personal questions:
"The questions reminded me of the infamous boiling frog experiment in which the frog doesn’t feel the water getting hotter until it’s too late. With us, because the level of vulnerability increased gradually, I didn’t notice we had entered intimate territory until we were already there, a process that can typically take weeks or months.
We all have a narrative of ourselves that we offer up to strangers and acquaintances, but Dr. Aron’s questions make it impossible to rely on that narrative."
Afterwards looking for 4 minutes into each others eyes.
I don't know if it helps falling in love, but I think it helps to get to know someone's character fairly well in a short time. Things you wouldn't talk to with a stranger and might take month to come out, will be talked through during the first meeting. Hard to fake/lie for that amount of time as well.
I can imagine that IF you hit it off with someone after going through this procedure and find that you are compatible with that person, there is a good chance.
I read the link.You basically have to spend a good bit of time with a stranger and answer 36 increasingly personal questions:
"The questions reminded me of the infamous boiling frog experiment in which the frog doesn’t feel the water getting hotter until it’s too late. With us, because the level of vulnerability increased gradually, I didn’t notice we had entered intimate territory until we were already there, a process that can typically take weeks or months.
We all have a narrative of ourselves that we offer up to strangers and acquaintances, but Dr. Aron’s questions make it impossible to rely on that narrative."
Afterwards looking for 4 minutes into each others eyes.
I don't know if it helps falling in love, but I think it helps to get to know someone's character fairly well in a short time. Things you wouldn't talk to with a stranger and might take month to come out, will be talked through during the first meeting. Hard to fake/lie for that amount of time as well.
I can imagine that IF you hit it off with someone after going through this procedure and find that you are compatible with that person, there is a good chance.
KNenagh: Hiya Tiny, I read the link.
You basically have to spend a good bit of time with a stranger and answer 36 increasingly personal questions:
"The questions reminded me of the infamous boiling frog experiment in which the frog doesn’t feel the water getting hotter until it’s too late. With us, because the level of vulnerability increased gradually, I didn’t notice we had entered intimate territory until we were already there, a process that can typically take weeks or months.
We all have a narrative of ourselves that we offer up to strangers and acquaintances, but Dr. Aron’s questions make it impossible to rely on that narrative."
Afterwards looking for 4 minutes into each others eyes.
I don't know if it helps falling in love, but I think it helps to get to know someone's character fairly well in a short time. Things you wouldn't talk to with a stranger and might take month to come out, will be talked through during the first meeting. Hard to fake/lie for that amount of time as well.
I can imagine that IF you hit it off with someone after going through this procedure and find that you are compatible with that person, there is a good chance.
Now where did that frog go...?You basically have to spend a good bit of time with a stranger and answer 36 increasingly personal questions:
"The questions reminded me of the infamous boiling frog experiment in which the frog doesn’t feel the water getting hotter until it’s too late. With us, because the level of vulnerability increased gradually, I didn’t notice we had entered intimate territory until we were already there, a process that can typically take weeks or months.
We all have a narrative of ourselves that we offer up to strangers and acquaintances, but Dr. Aron’s questions make it impossible to rely on that narrative."
Afterwards looking for 4 minutes into each others eyes.
I don't know if it helps falling in love, but I think it helps to get to know someone's character fairly well in a short time. Things you wouldn't talk to with a stranger and might take month to come out, will be talked through during the first meeting. Hard to fake/lie for that amount of time as well.
I can imagine that IF you hit it off with someone after going through this procedure and find that you are compatible with that person, there is a good chance.
michaelright: Now where did that frog go...?
Probably France.
Where else do they eat frog legs? @ peach
KN did a great summery of the article (!) but if you want to read it for yourself (and I think it is well worth it) try google: The New York Times to fall in love with anyone.
I checked and that led me to that page too
Hiya KN 
Yes, I think this is actually quite an amazing method they created there. Also says to name 3 things you believe you and the other have in common. To have some things in common that matter to the self a lot, I believe is vital for this to work, and of course to be open to the prospect of a relationship over all.
Method is built on creating intimacy very fast, and I must say from experience in this life, it is scary how many people even in relationships do not share intimacy. Met a guy a few years back through gaming and we got talking, and thing is that I myself have a tendency to speak very open when in a 1 on 1 situation. This, I have found, can lead to others opening up real fast in return, and this guy began to tell me stuff from his life that he usually never shared. He had been married for over 10 years and had never told his wife any of what he ended telling me. I was utterly shocked. Their marriage was in bad shape, and I told him he should go and explain all what he told me, to his wife. These were things vital to understanding him, and she knew nothing of it!
And his case is not the only one I have crossed path with over the years. People hold back a lot from what I have seen, even from those who should be closest to them.
Those 36 questions (they have a link to a new page in that article) I'd say are designed to break down fast the walls we have built around us. It is about inviting another into spaces that we usually try to keep others out from, and this creates intimacy - the stuff warm and loving relationships are made of.
KN did a great summery of the article (!) but if you want to read it for yourself (and I think it is well worth it) try google: The New York Times to fall in love with anyone.
I checked and that led me to that page too
Hiya KN
Yes, I think this is actually quite an amazing method they created there. Also says to name 3 things you believe you and the other have in common. To have some things in common that matter to the self a lot, I believe is vital for this to work, and of course to be open to the prospect of a relationship over all.
Method is built on creating intimacy very fast, and I must say from experience in this life, it is scary how many people even in relationships do not share intimacy. Met a guy a few years back through gaming and we got talking, and thing is that I myself have a tendency to speak very open when in a 1 on 1 situation. This, I have found, can lead to others opening up real fast in return, and this guy began to tell me stuff from his life that he usually never shared. He had been married for over 10 years and had never told his wife any of what he ended telling me. I was utterly shocked. Their marriage was in bad shape, and I told him he should go and explain all what he told me, to his wife. These were things vital to understanding him, and she knew nothing of it!
And his case is not the only one I have crossed path with over the years. People hold back a lot from what I have seen, even from those who should be closest to them.
Those 36 questions (they have a link to a new page in that article) I'd say are designed to break down fast the walls we have built around us. It is about inviting another into spaces that we usually try to keep others out from, and this creates intimacy - the stuff warm and loving relationships are made of.
KNenagh: Probably France. Where else do they eat frog legs?
Or anywhere BUT France, if it was a smart frog
Tinypaws: @ peach
KN did a great summery of the article (!) but if you want to read it for yourself (and I think it is well worth it) try google: The New York Times to fall in love with anyone.
I checked and that led me to that page too
Hiya KN
Yes, I think this is actually quite an amazing method they created there. Also says to name 3 things you believe you and the other have in common. To have some things in common that matter to the self a lot, I believe is vital for this to work, and of course to be open to the prospect of a relationship over all.
Method is built on creating intimacy very fast, and I must say from experience in this life, it is scary how many people even in relationships do not share intimacy. Met a guy a few years back through gaming and we got talking, and thing is that I myself have a tendency to speak very open when in a 1 on 1 situation. This, I have found, can lead to others opening up real fast in return, and this guy began to tell me stuff from his life that he usually never shared. He had been married for over 10 years and had never told his wife any of what he ended telling me. I was utterly shocked. Their marriage was in bad shape, and I told him he should go and explain all what he told me, to his wife. These were things vital to understanding him, and she knew nothing of it!
And his case is not the only one I have crossed path with over the years. People hold back a lot from what I have seen, even from those who should be closest to them.
Those 36 questions (they have a link to a new page in that article) I'd say are designed to break down fast the walls we have built around us. It is about inviting another into spaces that we usually try to keep others out from, and this creates intimacy - the stuff warm and loving relationships are made of.
KN did a great summery of the article (!) but if you want to read it for yourself (and I think it is well worth it) try google: The New York Times to fall in love with anyone.
I checked and that led me to that page too
Hiya KN
Yes, I think this is actually quite an amazing method they created there. Also says to name 3 things you believe you and the other have in common. To have some things in common that matter to the self a lot, I believe is vital for this to work, and of course to be open to the prospect of a relationship over all.
Method is built on creating intimacy very fast, and I must say from experience in this life, it is scary how many people even in relationships do not share intimacy. Met a guy a few years back through gaming and we got talking, and thing is that I myself have a tendency to speak very open when in a 1 on 1 situation. This, I have found, can lead to others opening up real fast in return, and this guy began to tell me stuff from his life that he usually never shared. He had been married for over 10 years and had never told his wife any of what he ended telling me. I was utterly shocked. Their marriage was in bad shape, and I told him he should go and explain all what he told me, to his wife. These were things vital to understanding him, and she knew nothing of it!
And his case is not the only one I have crossed path with over the years. People hold back a lot from what I have seen, even from those who should be closest to them.
Those 36 questions (they have a link to a new page in that article) I'd say are designed to break down fast the walls we have built around us. It is about inviting another into spaces that we usually try to keep others out from, and this creates intimacy - the stuff warm and loving relationships are made of.
Yes, I know people who don't really speak about the important things with their partner. Heard more than once that AFTER the wedding they were at each others throat about having kids or not etc.
There are a lot of couples who don't even have to say much to each other. Being lonely when being with someone.
I do actually think that this would be a good way to get to know someone.
I know some guys where this would frighten the .... out of them. 
KNenagh: Yes, I know people who don't really speak about the important things with their partner. Heard more than once that AFTER the wedding they were at each others throat about having kids or not etc.
There are a lot of couples who don't even have to say much to each other. Being lonely when being with someone.
There are a lot of couples who don't even have to say much to each other. Being lonely when being with someone.
Yes, totally insane, init? And scary!!!
KNenagh: I do actually think that this would be a good way to get to know someone. I know some guys where this would frighten the .... out of them.
Go for it, make them go through those questions with you
In serious though, yes I think this could be something for people who do date and want to find someone long term. Make it a fun game on a date, print the questions out and explain it's something to try, even if just for a laugh and an unusual date. Nothing to lose, I'd say, and it might even help some who generally have problems opening up full stop. Dating with therapy included!!!
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