Dating a Widow or Widower (50)
First of all the term is not grieving, specially after 10 years, would be correct to label it as depression. Not all people know how to clearly sort things out and so it's easy way for them to connect their weak points with their surroundings. This widow thing is closely associated with being divorce. Some people can't get over it after 10 years as well.
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Ano751: First of all the term is not grieving, specially after 10 years, would be correct to label it as depression. Not all people know how to clearly sort things out and so it's easy way for them to connect their weak points with their surroundings. This widow thing is closely associated with being divorce. Some people can't get over it after 10 years as well.
Being widowed is absolutely nothing like being divorced you have absolutely no chance of getting the one you loved back. Everybody grieves differently some just shrug it off and others take longer, I think it depends on the type of relationship they had.
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galrads: Dating a widow or widower.......
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
I find myself with the opportunity to date a widower who lost his wife only a year ago.
I do not want to get involved as I feel it's far too soon for him...he has three young kids also.
I do care for him but I don't think it's the right time for him. It's a very mucheap push pull feeling at the moment and don't know wat to do for the best.
Any suggestions??
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Ano751: First of all the term is not grieving, specially after 10 years, would be correct to label it as depression. Not all people know how to clearly sort things out and so it's easy way for them to connect their weak points with their surroundings. This widow thing is closely associated with being divorce. Some people can't get over it after 10 years as well.
I don't agree, it isn't depression, it is grief. Divorcing is very different from being widowed.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
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All women come with baggage, widowed or not!
The secret is to help them unpack!
The secret is to help them unpack!
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Deedee123x: I find myself with the opportunity to date a widower who lost his wife only a year ago.
I do not want to get involved as I feel it's far too soon for him...he has three young kids also.
I do care for him but I don't think it's the right time for him. It's a very mucheap push pull feeling at the moment and don't know wat to do for the best.
Any suggestions??
I do not want to get involved as I feel it's far too soon for him...he has three young kids also.
I do care for him but I don't think it's the right time for him. It's a very mucheap push pull feeling at the moment and don't know wat to do for the best.
Any suggestions??
Men often get over their previous relationship by getting involved again. Personally I would take a chance and get involved, just move slowly from one stage to the next, and listen carefully to what he is saying, and what he feels ready for. Speaking from my experience as a widow.
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completenutter: I don't agree, it isn't depression, it is grief. Divorcing is very different from being widowed.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
Very good point.
But what if there are very young children involved...is it ever wise to get involved when they are so young and would obviously miss their mum...it wud break my heart to hurt them by coming in and be seen to replace their mum esp when they r so young
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completenutter: Men often get over their previous relationship by getting involved again. Personally I would take a chance and get involved, just move slowly from one stage to the next, and listen carefully to what he is saying, and what he feels ready for. Speaking from my experience as a widow.
Sorry to hear u are a widow...thanks for sharing ur valuable opinions with us.
U are helping a great deal
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When we first meet people and start to develop some kind of connection, or relationship, we tend to talk about our pasts.
It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
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jac_the_gripper: When we first meet people and start to develop some kind of connection, or relationship, we tend to talk about our pasts.
It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
I think it might run deeper with this guy.
I'm not exactly far removed looks wise from his wife...quite similar.
I'm not sure is he "seeing" his wife in me in which case is it me he is even interested in or the possibility of mouldi ngt me into a.second grade her if that makes sense.
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It totally depends on the person.
If they are constantly talking about their dead spouse, then I would be wary.
The only 'perfect' relationship in some people's mind is on in which the spouse has died. That happens even when the marriage was far from perfect.
You can never beat that, and shouldn't try.
But many are ready to move on. And then, you have every chance of a great relationship with somebody who knows how to sustain a relationship
If they are constantly talking about their dead spouse, then I would be wary.
The only 'perfect' relationship in some people's mind is on in which the spouse has died. That happens even when the marriage was far from perfect.
You can never beat that, and shouldn't try.
But many are ready to move on. And then, you have every chance of a great relationship with somebody who knows how to sustain a relationship
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Deedee123x: Very good point.
But what if there are very young children involved...is it ever wise to get involved when they are so young and would obviously miss their mum...it wud break my heart to hurt them by coming in and be seen to replace their mum esp when they r so young
But what if there are very young children involved...is it ever wise to get involved when they are so young and would obviously miss their mum...it wud break my heart to hurt them by coming in and be seen to replace their mum esp when they r so young
Just don't involve them in the relationship until you know that you and he are a solid item. They do not ever have to meet you, nor you be part of their lives until you are certain.
He would be a very negligent father if he introduced his children early to a new relationship. Especially if they have recently lost their mam, and are vulnerable.
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completenutter: I don't agree, it isn't depression, it is grief. Divorcing is very different from being widowed.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
I am agree with Completenutter, it is grief ,what we feel, not depression. The person we have loved dearly is suddenly taken from us. We cant forget and clean out the memories in years, especially if theres childrens born in that marriage.
Time is helping us not to forget the memories, but strengthen us mentaly and phisicaly to can cope and accept reality that our beloved is no longer with us anymore. And life, we have responsibility to keep living and have rights to fill and feel love and happiness again .
It is only time DeeDee, just be patience and understanding his grief, when he is ready he will turn everything to you. It is good if they take time not in rush to decide into a new relationship.
They need trust and comfort zone to repeat again the "love" chemistry.
Usually widow or widower they do not want to live in the past , the memory is too heavy to be bear.
They are not looking for a similar partner , and not to compete the new partner with their late partner.
I know how they feel becos myself also a widow for more than 10 years..
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galrads: Dating a widow or widower.......
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
Thanks for giving me my first good laugh today,
that joke is so funny !
About your question,,, firstly ,i have no experience so far
in dating a widow so i can't comment from that point of view.
The thing that came to mind for me is ,that she may be feeling some guilt
in seeing another man,,,
Bringing out stuff that are a reminder of him,
might be her way of saying,,,,i haven't forgotten you.
Being compared to another man is not nice ever, even if it is a dead man.
Good luck Galrads!!
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completenutter: I don't agree, it isn't depression, it is grief. Divorcing is very different from being widowed.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
In a divorce you know the relationship for whatever reason did not work, and that person is alive somewhere.
When you are widowed, that person you might have loved and been loved by is ripped clean out of your life, leaving only memories to hold on to. It is devastating in it's complete overnight loss, and I don't think people 'get over it' but they learn to live with it.
To answer your question is it possible to have a relationship with a widow who seems still deeply invested in her past relationship, I believe yes it is. Understanding that the widow loves and misses her previous partner, like you might love and miss a deceased parent or child. Trying not to feel like you are competing with the loved person.
No matter how much a widow may feel for their previous partner, she/he can no longer receive love, support and company from them, nor can she/he enjoy actively loving them. She can have all that exclusively with you, and if you are patient and caring to her including her grief and feelings of loss, you will find she forms a deep attachment to you, and as she does so, her feelings for her previous partner will dim and become a shadow to the very live and active feelings she has for her immediate relationship.
I totally agree with your point of view
very well said.
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Deedee123x: Very good point.
But what if there are very young children involved...is it ever wise to get involved when they are so young and would obviously miss their mum...it wud break my heart to hurt them by coming in and be seen to replace their mum esp when they r so young
But what if there are very young children involved...is it ever wise to get involved when they are so young and would obviously miss their mum...it wud break my heart to hurt them by coming in and be seen to replace their mum esp when they r so young
Dont ever think to replace or compete theyr mom.
No one can replace their late mom or dad in their memory and heart. Esp if the childrens already feel their mom presence before, and know their mom is died.
But childrens character is beautiful, they are precious and sensitiv, and can easily adapt or ajust to someone , when they feel loved, cared from a person. Someone kind and wants to listen and became their friend.
If you can win their heart, sure you will get their Dad's heart too.
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online today!jac_the_gripper: When we first meet people and start to develop some kind of connection, or relationship, we tend to talk about our pasts.
It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
I agree with you. From my own personal feelings. I know that for the majority of my life I was married. So if I am going to talk about anything that happened in that time period it will often mean his name will be mentioned. I have tried both ways whilst dating. Talking normal about myself and just sitting there like a bump on the log for fear to mention his name will put a wedge there. I can never get over what happened but I can continue to live a happy productive life. Do I expect a man to replace him or compete with his memory. No. No more than I can erase my past to make a man more comfortable. The times I sat like a bump on the log I have listen to men talk about exes in good and bad ways. I will never understand dating It's thought that by sharing our histories, we psychologically extend the time we have known each other, or perhaps put our presents in some kind of context.
It could be that you can't compete with a deceased lover, but it could be that someone is sharing a big part of their life with you.
Perhaps it would be more productive to explore your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours with respect to feeling in competition, rather than someone trusted enough to be worthy of that sharing.
The push/pull comment - I think it might have been from deedee: maybe those feelings are a good instinctual guide. Maybe there are times to back off and allow space, other times where contact and connection is right for both of you. Relationships naturally have an ebb and flow, times where the connection is intense and times where we are more insular for whatever reason.
The one thing I can tell you given time you can replace old memories with new ones and have your own memories to talk about. Then I don't keep a shrine in my home either. 
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online today!galrads: Dating a widow or widower.......
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
It would be helpful to know how this dead person is coming between you. Why would you feel that way? Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."
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- I'm a 53 YEAR'S YUNG MAN that lives back in the 80s
- Which Of These Is Your Favorite Breakfast
Has anyone attempted to or successfully dated a widow or widower. I recently tried to make something of a relationship with a widow who was supposedly through the grieving after 10 years but I later discovered that I was often compared to a gold standard. Then shrines, photos etc resurfaced commemorating the deceased. It wasn't comfortable anymore.
Would you accept or move on if the dead idol comes between you at this point.
Do you even want to and can you compete with a dead idol and win, making the new relationship a priority instead?
Any shared experiences are appreciated here......
Irish widow joke.....
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in. You're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" "That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda.
There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery."
"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."
"I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."
Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"
"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."
"Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?"
"Well, no Brenda, no."
"No?"
"Fact is, he got out three times to pee."