Making friends ( Archived) (17)

Dec 29, 2017 4:29 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
I read on the blogs somewhere somebody mentioning making friends is impossible as u get older.

Just wondering how true this is for you all.
Are u the type who only counts people you have known since primary school,.friends.
Figuring that the more history u have with someone the less likelihood there is of being 'screwed over', by a friend.

Or are you the type who is open to making friends at any age..and figure trust sometimes isn't born of time but rather simply being able to read people well and knowing urself well.

Do u treat new and old friends the same....do u even introduce them to each other.
Just wondering ur thoughts on the matter.
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Dec 29, 2017 5:02 AM CST Making friends
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
Work contact, gym buddy, wingman, on the 5-a-side football team etc.. new friends come with a practical reason for having them where one of my oldest friends doesnt have the power of his legs - and although he was very useful for cutting the queue at theme parks we'd be friends with him all the same.
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Dec 29, 2017 5:10 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
ChesneyChrist: Work contact, gym buddy, wingman, on the 5-a-side football team etc.. new friends come with a practical reason for having them where one of my oldest friends doesnt have the power of his legs - and although he was very useful for cutting the queue at theme parks we'd be friends with him all the same.


Maybe I'm just selective in who I give the friendship title to.
Some people like u listed above would be mere colleagues or acquaintances not friends.

Friends to me are who I wud drop everything for if they needed me.
Who I confide in whom I trust.

Work people are simply a big NO.
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Dec 29, 2017 5:47 AM CST Making friends
Cachuchi
CachuchiCachuchiunknown, Navarre Spain12 Threads 943 Posts
Friendship is a complex subject for me.

I have no problem at all when it comes about talking or approaching to people, I provoke an immediate reaction which goes from love to hate, never easy but intense....I´ve made a lot of friends at different stages of my life, still in contact with my school mates from kindergarden (yeah 45 years ago and it comes from before facebook-whatsapp lol) ...I love to meet people, learn from them and share stuff but ....there is a limit that only one person has crossed, not even my best friend for more than 30 years.....I suppose it´s my introvert side ....in any case I do not think there are any age, it´s an attitude to or againts it.

That´s how I think ...
hug
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Dec 29, 2017 8:43 AM CST Making friends
mollybaby
mollybabymollybabyCork City, Cork Ireland56 Threads 8 Polls 23,608 Posts
Deedee123x: I read on the blogs somewhere somebody mentioning making friends is impossible as u get older.

Just wondering how true this is for you all.
Are u the type who only counts people you have known since primary school,.friends.
Figuring that the more history u have with someone the less likelihood there is of being 'screwed over', by a friend.

Or are you the type who is open to making friends at any age..and figure trust sometimes isn't born of time but rather simply being able to read people well and knowing urself well.

Do u treat new and old friends the same....do u even introduce them to each other.
Just wondering ur thoughts on the matter.


I have made friends throughout my life.
Usually through work, apart from my childhood friends, and even though we don't work together now, we are still great friends and keep in touch and meet regularly.
Work is where we spend a large proportion of our time, so it's only normal to develop friendships through it.
I have also developed real friendships with people I first interacted with online.
So the short answer to your question is no. It is not impossible to male friends as you get older.
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Dec 29, 2017 9:14 AM CST Making friends
britishcolumbian
britishcolumbianbritishcolumbianunknown, British Columbia Canada153 Threads 894 Posts
Deedee123x: I read on the blogs somewhere somebody mentioning making friends is impossible as u get older.

Just wondering how true this is for you all.
Are u the type who only counts people you have known since primary school,.friends.
Figuring that the more history u have with someone the less likelihood there is of being 'screwed over', by a friend.

Or are you the type who is open to making friends at any age..and figure trust sometimes isn't born of time but rather simply being able to read people well and knowing urself well.

Do u treat new and old friends the same....do u even introduce them to each other.
Just wondering ur thoughts on the matter.




Good one Deedee, any age is aright according to me.
wave wave wave
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Dec 29, 2017 9:38 AM CST Making friends
deviant_slice
deviant_slicedeviant_sliceunknown, Tyne and Wear, England UK26 Threads 1 Polls 2,252 Posts
Deedee123x:

Friends to me are who I wud drop everything for if they needed me.
Who I confide in whom I trust.



Agree. I'd probably do Facebook if it had an aquaintance list.
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Dec 29, 2017 9:41 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
Cachuchi: Friendship is a complex subject for me.

I have no problem at all when it comes about talking or approaching to people, I provoke an immediate reaction which goes from love to hate, never easy but intense....I´ve made a lot of friends at different stages of my life, still in contact with my school mates from kindergarden (yeah 45 years ago and it comes from before facebook-whatsapp lol) ...I love to meet people, learn from them and share stuff but ....there is a limit that only one person has crossed, not even my best friend for more than 30 years.....I suppose it´s my introvert side ....in any case I do not think there are any age, it´s an attitude to or againts it.

That´s how I think ...


I do like to meet people also n I'm interested as u say in learning..listening to people's stories etc.
I just find it hard to let people in on my personal life family life etc...that takes time for me too.
Have friends since I was in primary and all up along

I have friends i have made through work in previous years in previous jobs.
But my line of work now I don't care to mix work with my outside life...no matter how long I'll work there.

I have plenty of friends for that.
Plus hope to make lots more in the coming years.
Esp single ones who have a passion for travel haha.
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Dec 29, 2017 9:43 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
deviant_slice: Agree. I'd probably do Facebook if it had an aquaintance list.


Hiya Dev!!

I'll be ur acquaintance no problem wink

How are ya??
Eating well I hope conversing wave
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Dec 29, 2017 9:44 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
britishcolumbian: Good one Deedee, any age is aright according to me.


Me too BC.....makes me sad for those who feel they simply cannot and won't.
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Dec 29, 2017 9:49 AM CST Making friends
deviant_slice
deviant_slicedeviant_sliceunknown, Tyne and Wear, England UK26 Threads 1 Polls 2,252 Posts
Deedee123x: Hiya Dev!!

I'll be ur acquaintance no problem

How are ya??
Eating well I hope


Hi D. I 'm good. You?

Just got back from Sainsbury's. Cottage pie and a tin of carrots and peas tonight. Pushing the boat out cos I'm out on the razz soon. Better go. That microwave won't turn itself on.

Take care.
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Dec 29, 2017 10:00 AM CST Making friends
Deedee123x
Deedee123xDeedee123xLimerick, Ireland69 Threads 4,795 Posts
deviant_slice: Hi D. I 'm good. You?

Just got back from Sainsbury's. Cottage pie and a tin of carrots and peas tonight. Pushing the boat out cos I'm out on the razz soon. Better go. That microwave won't turn itself on.

Take care.


You need a home cooked meal man!!! doh

Throw out that microwave.

Start watching Nigeria lawson cookery programs....if there was any woman that wud get a man to want to cook it's Nigella.

But I see ur choosing spuds wisely for soakage.....good choice.

Enjoy ur ngt out...
Take care.
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Dec 29, 2017 3:39 PM CST Making friends
raphael119
raphael119raphael119washington d.c., District of Columbia USA19 Threads 3 Polls 5,181 Posts
I suspect as we age and family grows small we need friends more than ever. Maybe a small group and net working in social and in support groups.

I still love a lonely, commando jaunt in the remotest part of the Smokies now and then, though.
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Dec 29, 2017 6:25 PM CST Making friends
Let_Us
Let_UsLet_UsAnaheim, California USA9 Threads 1,017 Posts
Cachuchi: Friendship is a complex subject for me.

I have no problem at all when it comes about talking or approaching to people, I provoke an immediate reaction which goes from love to hate, never easy but intense....I´ve made a lot of friends at different stages of my life, still in contact with my school mates from kindergarden (yeah 45 years ago and it comes from before facebook-whatsapp lol) ...I love to meet people, learn from them and share stuff but ....there is a limit that only one person has crossed, not even my best friend for more than 30 years.....I suppose it´s my introvert side ....in any case I do not think there are any age, it´s an attitude to or againts it.

That´s how I think ...


It's EASY to see that you're going to "provoke" people (for better, or worse), Cachuchi! From reading your post and threads, you're ALREADY "intrigued" ME! And I'm not usually "impressed" quickly. You're thoughtful, intelligent, open (which is somewhat rare), and "outspoken" (which "I" find "intriguing", in a woman). And I dare say you probably intimidate the hell outta ANYONE that doesn't TRULY have INNER security! I'd LOVE to watch you move through a group of people! Watching how they responded/reacted to you, would not only tell me a lot about THEM, I'm SURE it would be amusing, to! But I also think you reveal ONLY what you want to reveal, about yourself. And you have a "fine" judgment about how you "affect" people, and how they "read/react to" you.

But I agree that friends are where, and when, you find them! I DON'T make "friends" easily. (I'm OPEN to it, but MY experience is that MOST people are TOO INSECURE to let friendship happen. To make THAT commitment.) But there ARE people that you'll meet, occasionally, with whom you just have that IMMEDIATE rapport. And the conversation flows with ease. And even the silences are comfortable. You just CAN'T shut those relationships off. (Well, that's not true. I see people do it everyday. But, for ME, "I" can't NOT pursue it! Friendship is the rarest and most valuable a thing that a man [or woman] can possess.) So, yeah, old friends ARE good friends! But NEW friends can be just as GOOD friends! Every opportunity IS what you can make of it! And if a person shuts thenselve's OFF from those opportunities, the one they're hurting, the most, is only themselves.

Just keep on being you, Cachuchi! If somebody can't "handle" you, that's THEIR loss! hug wine teddybear
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Dec 29, 2017 6:41 PM CST Making friends
Let_Us
Let_UsLet_UsAnaheim, California USA9 Threads 1,017 Posts
Deedee123x: I do like to meet people also n I'm interested as u say in learning..listening to people's stories etc.
I just find it hard to let people in on my personal life family life etc...that takes time for me too.
Have friends since I was in primary and all up along

I have friends i have made through work in previous years in previous jobs.
But my line of work now I don't care to mix work with my outside life...no matter how long I'll work there.

I have plenty of friends for that.
Plus hope to make lots more in the coming years.
Esp single ones who have a passion for travel haha.


Sounds like you may have a "trust" and "security" issue, Dee. I'm not about to postulate about that. It's not my place. But, in MY "experience", the more trust you give, the more trust you'll get. But that's hard, sometimes. Emotional pain can often be worse than physical pain. But you CAN'T let a little "pain" close all your doors. Sure! You're gonna lose, sometimes. But, you CAN'T "WIN", if you never get in the game! So ya gotta make a choice. Is the chance of winning WORTH the cost of losing? Or is losing such a "tragedy", that you're willing to forego the possibility of winning, in order to prevent it? I've made my choice. I'm a tough ol' bird! I've survived EVERYTHING they've thrown at me, so far! And so have you! Go for the gusto, girl! hug cheers peace kiss teddybear
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Dec 30, 2017 9:46 AM CST Making friends
lifeisadream
lifeisadreamlifeisadreamMexi Go, Mexico State Mexico156 Threads 20 Polls 16,713 Posts
Deedee123x: I read on the blogs somewhere somebody mentioning making friends is impossible as u get older.

Just wondering how true this is for you all.
Are u the type who only counts people you have known since primary school,.friends.
Figuring that the more history u have with someone the less likelihood there is of being 'screwed over', by a friend.

Or are you the type who is open to making friends at any age..and figure trust sometimes isn't born of time but rather simply being able to read people well and knowing urself well.

Do u treat new and old friends the same....do u even introduce them to each other.
Just wondering ur thoughts on the matter.


Friends are special people to connect with and I wish I had more time to enjoy their company in real life yet some friends abroad are as special as the ones I met with frequently.

I do not give my friendship so easily because being a friend is an important matter to me. Some of my friends are from high school and I would say I have more than enough.

My very close friends are both genders and regarding to them I am rather conservative and kind of political "right wing" go figure laugh
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Apr 24, 2018 7:52 PM CST Making friends
FoxeyLady
FoxeyLadyFoxeyLadyRemedios de Escalada, Buenos Aires Argentina1 Threads 58 Posts
ChesneyChrist: Work contact, gym buddy, wingman, on the 5-a-side football team etc.. new friends come with a practical reason for having them where one of my oldest friends doesnt have the power of his legs - and although he was very useful for cutting the queue at theme parks we'd be friends with him all the same.
I made a wonderful friend once while I was shopping at the mall, she was so friendly, had a great smile and understood me so well, unfortunately we were stopped by security guards at the parking lot who assured me she was a sports apparel dummy. crying
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