Are you afraid of being hurt again? (209)
Bearwoman: It's not any fun anymore when you give your all to someone who you thought loved you and then you find out differently.
It hurts like heck.
It hurts like heck.
I don't mean any offense, BW, but I have a problem with your statement.
Reading your statement, the way it's worded, implies that you're giving your love NOT because YOU "love", but because the person you're "loving", loves you! In which case "I" have to think you're doing your "loving" ALL wrong! We ALL have our own ways. But when "I" love someone, it's something I'm doing, for ME! NOT for THEM! I love, because it's MY way of expressing MY appreciation, of all they contribute to MY life. Of their BEINg a part of my life! NOT for the things they DO, but for the things they ARE! Does THAT make any sense to you? And there no reciprocity required. I GIVE love, because "I" WANT to! Not as some sort you show me yours, and I'll show you mine! I may be misreading what you wrote, but that's the way it reads, to me.
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Let_Us: I don't mean any offense, BW, but I have a problem with your statement.
Reading your statement, the way it's worded, implies that you're giving your love NOT because YOU "love", but because the person you're "loving", loves you! In which case "I" have to think you're doing your "loving" ALL wrong! We ALL have our own ways. But when "I" love someone, it's something I'm doing, for ME! NOT for THEM! I love, because it's MY way of expressing MY appreciation, of all they contribute to MY life. Of their BEINg a part of my life! NOT for the things they DO, but for the things they ARE! Does THAT make any sense to you? And there no reciprocity required. I GIVE love, because "I" WANT to! Not as some sort you show me yours, and I'll show you mine! I may be misreading what you wrote, but that's the way it reads, to me.
Reading your statement, the way it's worded, implies that you're giving your love NOT because YOU "love", but because the person you're "loving", loves you! In which case "I" have to think you're doing your "loving" ALL wrong! We ALL have our own ways. But when "I" love someone, it's something I'm doing, for ME! NOT for THEM! I love, because it's MY way of expressing MY appreciation, of all they contribute to MY life. Of their BEINg a part of my life! NOT for the things they DO, but for the things they ARE! Does THAT make any sense to you? And there no reciprocity required. I GIVE love, because "I" WANT to! Not as some sort you show me yours, and I'll show you mine! I may be misreading what you wrote, but that's the way it reads, to me.
You don't know anything about me so leave me alone.
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I keep thinking that I am at times, maybe I haven't met the right woman!
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
we just became more experienced... but we shouldn't stop due to previous mistakes...
every new person in life is for new experience and we should go further despite of possible hurt....
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
I am always afraid of getting hurt because I have to work where my ex works and he hung up on me and told him not to call him, I was heartbroken crying a lot because of him.------ This thread is Archived ------
No , i am in control of not being hurt, and i won't allow it to happen again.
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Yes, I hate it when someone gives me a Chinese burn or a dead arm
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Deedee123x: I hope thats not true.
No one should be alone
once bit twice shy,whitesnake?No one should be alone
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Bnaughty: Yes, I hate it when someone gives me a Chinese burn or a dead arm
how long should a gal wait after her mate passes,1 yr.ive heard.------ This thread is Archived ------
Bearwoman: It's not any fun anymore when you give your all to someone who you thought loved you and then you find out differently.
It hurts like heck.
It hurts like heck.
One thing yo can do, is to NOT internalise it! EXTERNALISE it! It's NOT "YOUR" loss! It's THEIRS! THEY lost ALL you had to offer! And get on with the finding of the one that WANTS what you have to offer! IF you keep putting your "SELF" out there, SOMEBODY will come along, who'll appreciate your "bait"! But you have to STOP the "hurting", and KEEP your "bait" in the water, where SOMEBODY will find it! JUst a thought!
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
Yes but I haven't given up on finding a good man that will never hurt me again
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reb56: how long should a gal wait after her mate passes,1 yr.ive heard.
or u are the rebound guy.------ This thread is Archived ------
cally77: You might like this poem, it was written by Anne Bronte about a guy she knew named William Weightman:
A Reminiscence - Anne Brontë
YES, thou art gone! and never more
Thy sunny smile shall gladden me;
But I may pass the old church door,
And pace the floor that covers thee.
May stand upon the cold, damp stone,
And think that, frozen, lies below
The lightest heart that I have known,
The kindest I shall ever know.
Yet, though I cannot see thee more,
'Tis still a comfort to have seen;
And though thy transient life is o'er,
'Tis sweet to think that thou hast been;
To think a soul so near divine,
Within a form so angel fair,
United to a heart like thine,
Has gladdened once our humble sphere.
A Reminiscence - Anne Brontë
YES, thou art gone! and never more
Thy sunny smile shall gladden me;
But I may pass the old church door,
And pace the floor that covers thee.
May stand upon the cold, damp stone,
And think that, frozen, lies below
The lightest heart that I have known,
The kindest I shall ever know.
Yet, though I cannot see thee more,
'Tis still a comfort to have seen;
And though thy transient life is o'er,
'Tis sweet to think that thou hast been;
To think a soul so near divine,
Within a form so angel fair,
United to a heart like thine,
Has gladdened once our humble sphere.
That is a nice poem.
Thanx for posting it.
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SweetnFunnyChic: Yes but I haven't given up on finding a good man that will never hurt me again
No offense, sweetheart, but you're NEVER going to find a man who will NEVER hurt you! The BEST you can do is find a guy that is concerned ENOUGH about you to NOT hurt you INTENTIONALLY! And who will hold you in his arms and apologise to you when he figures out he has! Just saying - DON'T let absolute "perfection" stand in the was of a "VERY GOOD" life! Always and never will ALMOST always screw things up!
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
The first cut is the deepest.
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
Not afraid, about hurt feelings
Means he is not design for me.
What im afraid is, starting again from the beginning, it takes time energy and emotion
We do spent time too much for knowing each other and adapt with each life's rythm,
Thats why i choose online, its slowly, but in details know the person better, can contact him anytime.
When the time is mature and we are ready, we can arrange to see each other in real
With online, no phisic presence , i still can arrange my work agenda, time for myself and family, and go anywhere i want
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Miwagi: The first cut is the deepest.
like ol rod,then its a heartache/bonnie tylor?fools game,70s/80s had the rock songs,like ol rockin rod,etc.------ This thread is Archived ------
It's a matter of being wise with the choices you make like anything in life.
Don't blame him nor her for that matter as the buck fall's with you it was you
who made a bad choice you see the red flags but you push them out of the
way hoping for the best.
Don't blame him nor her for that matter as the buck fall's with you it was you
who made a bad choice you see the red flags but you push them out of the
way hoping for the best.
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Maya74: Ideally - we should learn from our past mistakes and enter new relationships with that knowledge, yet fresh and capable to love and trust wholeheartedly again. But, can we really do that? Or do we develop all sorts of ways to protect ourselves from being hurt again and thus - maybe - prevent ourselves from being truly happy with someone else?
Yes, I am far too sensitive to live in a world full of cruel wimmin
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I think that I have treated no one like rubbish, did you feel that I treated you as such, if you did then I apologise profusely, nothing was intentional.
I didn't meant that you directed anything bad towards me, was rather speaking in general way and this expression of putting all women in the same 'rubbish bin' category (the same extrime is for putting all man in the same rubbish bin category!), shouldn't be taken in litteral way but read in between the lines...
Talking from my own experience, there was a stage when i treated all man as potential scammers who are only after to scam me in different ways and than one day a genuine man told me that 'i played with him' and treated him as scammer and that was the last thing Ive heard from him ...I still didn't care but what he said made me think as if anyone consider self as good person than you don't hurt people intentionally. Regardless that nothing happened and at the time nothing would made any difference to me as my mental and emotional state wasn't ready to start anything new ,that brife event made me to anylise and reconsider, in search for self balance in judgments .....as what ever bad experience we all go true in some stage of our life, it's simple injustice we do to self and others if making presumptions based on some previous experience...
I know some people never recover from bad experience with someone who hurt them ...which doesn't make them bad people but bitter, deeply distrustful and we can say 'we let go of the past ' but until we take a new eyes to look at the world and truly put past behind ....we will be disappointed and nothing new will ever happen....
Personally, I am very suspecious of people intentions and maybe we're not so different, but I am also optimistic in recognising good people too that do not only care for material gain.
Hope I've explained myself better.