Ultimatums (26)
It's mostly a sign of weakness and desperation.
Setting an ultimatum is often admittance of failure.
But some lines are non negotiable, can not be crossed or stretched.
Yes they do work but are often used wrongly
Setting an ultimatum is often admittance of failure.
But some lines are non negotiable, can not be crossed or stretched.
Yes they do work but are often used wrongly
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MetaMaus: It's mostly a sign of weakness and desperation.
Setting an ultimatum is often admittance of failure.
But some lines are non negotiable, can not be crossed or stretched.
Yes they do work but are often used wrongly
Setting an ultimatum is often admittance of failure.
But some lines are non negotiable, can not be crossed or stretched.
Yes they do work but are often used wrongly
Well said
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No they dont work for me either, as Meta said they usually are done out of desperation and a need to gain control over a situation or person, much like manipulation.
Dont like either
Dont like either
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Friskyone: Do ultimatums work?
Not for me they don't.
Not for me they don't.
sure, i support my words with a pointed water pistol
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Friskyone: Do ultimatums work?
Not for me they don't.
Does it relate to proposal of marriage ? Marry me or you know what.Not for me they don't.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk,
I loose interest.
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Deedee123x: No they dont work for me either, as Meta said they usually are done out of desperation and a need to gain control over a situation or person, much like manipulation.
Dont like either
Dont like either
I had an idea you would would say that. You go girl!
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rainbowdream2017: Does it relate to proposal of marriage ? Marry me or you know what.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Me too!
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rainbowdream2017: Does it relate to proposal of marriage ? Marry me or you know what.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Would you believe Rainbow, thats how my ex fiance proposed to me!! By ultimatum..
Was much younger at the time, and went blindly and stupidly into an engagement.
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What, like, 'marry me, or it's over between us' sort of thing?
Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
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Ultimatums work contrary to me, set an ultimatum and I react just the opposite.
Example: If you do not marry me, then I leave you, my reaction, ok, until never more than. Ultimatums are intimidations, so ... I am not too intimidated. Widely used in relationships to get something done, probably a reason why I feel so happy as a single. And no, I'm not talking about compromises in a relationship, two people are present in a relationship, each with their own personality, compromises are part of that. But if one of the two partners exerts pressure through the use of ultimatums, then its over.
But...there is always a but ofcourse. In what context do you mean ultimatums here? Relation or work?
Example: If you do not marry me, then I leave you, my reaction, ok, until never more than. Ultimatums are intimidations, so ... I am not too intimidated. Widely used in relationships to get something done, probably a reason why I feel so happy as a single. And no, I'm not talking about compromises in a relationship, two people are present in a relationship, each with their own personality, compromises are part of that. But if one of the two partners exerts pressure through the use of ultimatums, then its over.
But...there is always a but ofcourse. In what context do you mean ultimatums here? Relation or work?
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Deedee123x: Would you believe Rainbow, thats how my ex fiance proposed to me!! By ultimatum..
Was much younger at the time, and went blindly and stupidly into an engagement.
I believe at the time you thought its kind of romantic.Was much younger at the time, and went blindly and stupidly into an engagement.
We're all more blind in youthful age. God bless our innocence. ------ This thread is Archived ------
jac_the_gripper: What, like, 'marry me, or it's over between us' sort of thing?
Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
I am against any kind of blackmail or ultimatums but not every culture /nations, view from the same point of view and it can be really culturally understandable if you're born in culture where marriage is taken as honouring what you love with taking full responsibility and care...and opposite to that can be taken, 'as taking you for a long ride' as dishonoring ....to unknown future, where women biological clock is ticking out when she rich 30s. Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
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Ultimatums are easily dealt with / defused ... just ask
" OK, what's brought this on, now? "
And LISTEN CAREFULLY to the answer eh!
Often it's down to frustration having built up on the other person's part and them just 'not having the interpersonal skills' to manage the situation in any other way.
Would I place an ultimatum on another?
Probably not.
The 'one exception that might come to mind' might be if I really valued the relationship, wanted to it continue and grow BUT the woman steadfastly refused to discuss 'XYZ' topic that was important to my self.
So, that would be in the context of 'We need to sort this out, I can see you're having trouble with XYZ ... if we can't manage between the pair of us I'd like to organise something with a counsellor to help us both by facilitating that conversation. "
I'd NOT be saying 'Counselling or it's over ...'
If the answer was still no, I'd just call it a day and quit the relationship ... but I'm thinking this is more a case of me setting a boundary rather then making an ultimatum.
" OK, what's brought this on, now? "
And LISTEN CAREFULLY to the answer eh!
Often it's down to frustration having built up on the other person's part and them just 'not having the interpersonal skills' to manage the situation in any other way.
Would I place an ultimatum on another?
Probably not.
The 'one exception that might come to mind' might be if I really valued the relationship, wanted to it continue and grow BUT the woman steadfastly refused to discuss 'XYZ' topic that was important to my self.
So, that would be in the context of 'We need to sort this out, I can see you're having trouble with XYZ ... if we can't manage between the pair of us I'd like to organise something with a counsellor to help us both by facilitating that conversation. "
I'd NOT be saying 'Counselling or it's over ...'
If the answer was still no, I'd just call it a day and quit the relationship ... but I'm thinking this is more a case of me setting a boundary rather then making an ultimatum.
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rainbowdream2017: Does it relate to proposal of marriage ? Marry me or you know what.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Nah, ultimatums just makes me keener to do opposite. If man tells me to be quiet, I can't stop talking...but if he tells me to talk, I loose interest.
Just in general. Nothing specific.
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Dedovix: sure, i support my words with a pointed water pistol
Scared of you
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jac_the_gripper: What, like, 'marry me, or it's over between us' sort of thing?
Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
Yes, ultimatums work splendidly if you're okay with either option.
Usually, when people are issuing an ultimatum they are okay with either option. That's what is most interesting about them.
If someone is okay with marriage and it being over, it says something about them.
If someone is okay about with you eating your sprouts, or killing you, it says something about them.
And ultimatums especially work if you're trying to get rid of someone. Whether the recipient marries, walks away, eats their sprouts, or is killed, one way, or another, at some point they won't be seen for dust.
Your second sentence is so true.
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Lots of people would love to give me an ultimatum.
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Friskyone: Do ultimatums work?
Not for me they don't.
Not for me they don't.
When I was a much younger man than I am today, I did some modeling. A great beauty once gave me an Ultimatum of sorts. She said I can't choose between you and the other guy. I love you both so much ( this is the first I'd heard of the other guy, smile). My response was " you just did" !! She went on to have a great career, but without me !!
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Geronimolion: Ultimatums work contrary to me, set an ultimatum and I react just the opposite.
Example: If you do not marry me, then I leave you, my reaction, ok, until never more than. Ultimatums are intimidations, so ... I am not too intimidated. Widely used in relationships to get something done, probably a reason why I feel so happy as a single. And no, I'm not talking about compromises in a relationship, two people are present in a relationship, each with their own personality, compromises are part of that. But if one of the two partners exerts pressure through the use of ultimatums, then its over.
But...there is always a but ofcourse. In what context do you mean ultimatums here? Relation or work?
Example: If you do not marry me, then I leave you, my reaction, ok, until never more than. Ultimatums are intimidations, so ... I am not too intimidated. Widely used in relationships to get something done, probably a reason why I feel so happy as a single. And no, I'm not talking about compromises in a relationship, two people are present in a relationship, each with their own personality, compromises are part of that. But if one of the two partners exerts pressure through the use of ultimatums, then its over.
But...there is always a but ofcourse. In what context do you mean ultimatums here? Relation or work?
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Not for me they don't.