Daily Chuckle ... (3,607)
A sandwich walks into a bar.. the bartender looks up and says
Im sorry, we don’t serve food here
Im sorry, we don’t serve food here
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I asked my wife if I was the only one she's been with.
She said, "Yes, the others were at least sevens or eights".
She said, "Yes, the others were at least sevens or eights".
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So far, 2019 seems odd.
Just like every other year.
But maybe things will even out next year....
Just like every other year.
But maybe things will even out next year....
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Maria asked her husband Mike: Why you're always playing golf with John, and never with Chris?
Mike answered: Well, would you play against someone who gets angry and curses when he loses, cheats with the scoring paper, picks up the ball when it's in the bunker and lays it on the grass, and throws his clubs anywhere after a bad shot?
Maria: Nof of course not.
Mike: Chris neither.
Mike answered: Well, would you play against someone who gets angry and curses when he loses, cheats with the scoring paper, picks up the ball when it's in the bunker and lays it on the grass, and throws his clubs anywhere after a bad shot?
Maria: Nof of course not.
Mike: Chris neither.
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Another Blonde Joke
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A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool...
After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'
After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?'
'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis.'
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Brilliant !
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Well, we had a campaign of the gouvernment saying: Drinks can make more damage than you would like.
And then we said: A marriage can cause more damage than you can drink.
And then we said: A marriage can cause more damage than you can drink.
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Tulefell: - Honey, I have no clean undershorts...
- Take on a sock!
- Take on a sock!
Would have to be a knee-high sock for me... 
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The second one says: I dare to get the cheese out of the mousetrap.
The third one gets his coat and says: I have to go home to feed the cat.