why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad (35)
galradsDublin, Ohio USA2,264 Threads 279 Polls 36,283 Postswhy do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
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Yes indeed, move on you’re grown now with a family
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galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
Cos they can.------ This thread is Archived ------
galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
To quote a Biblical passage:"The sins of the fathers shall be visited upon the sons"
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galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
Never weaned------ This thread is Archived ------
TheRighteousOne: To quote a Biblical passage:
"The sins of the fathers shall be visited upon the sons"
Ezekiel 18:19-20 ESV "The sins of the fathers shall be visited upon the sons"
“Yet you say, ‘Why should not the son suffer for the iniquity of the father?’ When the son has done what is just and right, and has been careful to observe all my statutes, he shall surely live. The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself.
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galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
Some people have been raised by parents who were raised by parents who were raised by parents who were cruel... 'Talking about it' is their attempt to get it out of their systems ... regrettably it's not a strategy that will ever work unless the individual chances upon a person who knows how to listen properly, is willing to 'actually hear' the full extent of their experiences and pain and vitally is not themselves 'triggered' into their own past cycles of pain.
It appears that when 'a bunch of people who have Pain X in common' get together it often becomes the setting for what looks like competitive misery - with each trying to outrank the other in the acuteness and chronicness of 'what was done to them'.
ALL that this achieves is to 'dig themselves in further' and collectively such people soon 'blame society' for not doing enough to alleviate their pain ...
But, what CAN 'society do' when people gain advantages ( sympathy / attention / excused from work / receipt of financial benefits / attention from specialists and etc )?
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Because they need someone to blame for their problems and they need to do some healing work...
Men have to heal their mother wound and women their father in order not to attract the same relationships over and over again.
Men have to heal their mother wound and women their father in order not to attract the same relationships over and over again.
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You will be stuck in your story until you heal it and let it go....I agree with hex....some people do not have even close to ideal childhoods.....
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As one inherits one's genes from one's parents, there are indeed, in a very literal sense, to blame for who we are today.
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Daniela and Bearwoman have it right. Until we take the responsibility to take the wheel of life in our hands we can begin to work on our wounds.
Many love to make excuses of their failings in life. Its the parents fault, the teachers and school system, its the politicians, the dog ate my homework, the cat peed on my homework. I was diagnosed with some kind of illness that would effect my entire life!! I was dropped kicked at the 50 yard line when I was baby!!
There are a multitude of excuses we can dream up and because our parents are the first exposure into this world we learn how to react and respond to that immediate environment. Genetic traits passed down from generation to generation can be a factor. The power to rise above our dysfunction determines our fate. We make choices good and bad alike yet, if we keep making the same mistakes over and over after being told over and over how to correctly do things do we blame the parents the cat the dog the weather or something outside of us?
After awhile life catches on and our BS catches up with us.
If only I knew this 35 years ago.
Many love to make excuses of their failings in life. Its the parents fault, the teachers and school system, its the politicians, the dog ate my homework, the cat peed on my homework. I was diagnosed with some kind of illness that would effect my entire life!! I was dropped kicked at the 50 yard line when I was baby!!
There are a multitude of excuses we can dream up and because our parents are the first exposure into this world we learn how to react and respond to that immediate environment. Genetic traits passed down from generation to generation can be a factor. The power to rise above our dysfunction determines our fate. We make choices good and bad alike yet, if we keep making the same mistakes over and over after being told over and over how to correctly do things do we blame the parents the cat the dog the weather or something outside of us?
After awhile life catches on and our BS catches up with us.
If only I knew this 35 years ago.
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don't know why, but this week I heard about a boy in India, that is bringing his parents to court, because they gave birth to him. It seems to be a religion there.
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charles_nz: Cos they can.
Not the kiwi way 
Are you actually a real kiwi
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charles_nz: As one inherits one's genes from one's parents, there are indeed, in a very literal sense, to blame for who we are today.
unless you become an actual man an make things better from what one had . If one doesn't agree.
Change for the better
Isn't that what I real man does
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galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
People are complicated, emotional creatures. But your laptop won't come crying to you and neither will Amazon or Siri, the more time you spend single and accustomed to robotics the less you'll "get" people.------ This thread is Archived ------
And not unrelated to this is the fact that people don't have the familial support network they once did.
Just look at connectingsingles, in the good old days parents and grandparents wouldn't be on here they'd be much more focused on the family and the family would in turn be much more respectful of them.
It doesn't explain each individual case but it does explain the general sense of being jilted and betrayed amongst younger people. There's a sense that "maturity" has abdicated responsibilty and left us up to our necks in it.
Just look at connectingsingles, in the good old days parents and grandparents wouldn't be on here they'd be much more focused on the family and the family would in turn be much more respectful of them.
It doesn't explain each individual case but it does explain the general sense of being jilted and betrayed amongst younger people. There's a sense that "maturity" has abdicated responsibilty and left us up to our necks in it.
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But it could be worse. Baby boomers turned on otherwise good parents just because those parents couldn't spell very well. A youth rebellion today would be considerably more valid than the one of 50 years ago.
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Another factor is the grandparents who die like cattle. The onset of the nursing home, youth seeing what its parents did to their parents changed the tone of family in the western world.
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galrads: why do some people talk about things that happened years ago and blame parents for stuff that is bad?
If they are guilty, they just are, and no-one can change it, as it's the past, and if they have passed away already, you don't even have the option to ask them why!------ This thread is Archived ------
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