What's a guy to do? (8)
It's only a coffee.
When I wouldn't want to see someone again, I would want to pay for my coffee. If I would be happy to see someone again, I would have no issues if he pays and I'll pay the next time.
To avoid a situation like this - when asking someone out, maybe mention that you want to invite her for a coffee. If someone wants to pay for their own coffee, they probably will say so.
Yep, it's a minefield. Best of luck.
When I wouldn't want to see someone again, I would want to pay for my coffee. If I would be happy to see someone again, I would have no issues if he pays and I'll pay the next time.
To avoid a situation like this - when asking someone out, maybe mention that you want to invite her for a coffee. If someone wants to pay for their own coffee, they probably will say so.
Yep, it's a minefield. Best of luck.
RockVacirca:
What is a guy to do?
Same situation, same man, same result. Don't change anything :DWhat is a guy to do?
RockVacirca: My first attempts at dating via ConnectingSingles, some months ago:
I live on the Costa del Sol, between Fuengirola and La Cala. When I joined CS I received a few likes, and over a one month period I liked back three of them.
Like #1:
The lady lived in Estepona, and we arranged to meet there for coffee at a cafe she liked that was local. The conversation went well and I thought things were progressing nicely. She didn't look much her profile picture, but I said nothing, and it was me who got a telling off for not looking as good as my profile photos. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffees, and that she did not like to be beholding to any man (she did seem to be put out by the fact I offered to pay). I thought, fair enough. Thought no more about it. She messaged me the next day to thank me for the previous day, but as there was no spark for her she would continue her search. Again, fair enough.
Like #2:
A week later I went on an almost identical meet-up for coffee with another lady, again in Estepona, but at a different coffee shop. Another pleasant chat, but it was obvious that she not only didn't share my interests (dancing, music, cinema), she actually disliked them all. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffee, that she believed in equality, (but said it in an aggressive way), and got out her purse. Again, I thought, fair enough, we paid and left. This time it was I who messaged later to say for me there was no spark, but thanked her for the meet-up.
Like #3:
Another week passes and I got another meet-up for coffee, this time closer to home in La Cala. The date went well and I thought this time it may lead to a second date. However, when it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out, and she got her purse out too. This time I said nothing, looked at the bill and flicked through the notes in my wallet, watching what she would do. She also looked at the bill, and opened her purse. We both paid for our own coffees. The next day I got a stinging message, that said if I wanted to have more success with the ladies, I should be a gentleman and offer to pay for their coffees!
What is a guy to do?
I live on the Costa del Sol, between Fuengirola and La Cala. When I joined CS I received a few likes, and over a one month period I liked back three of them.
Like #1:
The lady lived in Estepona, and we arranged to meet there for coffee at a cafe she liked that was local. The conversation went well and I thought things were progressing nicely. She didn't look much her profile picture, but I said nothing, and it was me who got a telling off for not looking as good as my profile photos. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffees, and that she did not like to be beholding to any man (she did seem to be put out by the fact I offered to pay). I thought, fair enough. Thought no more about it. She messaged me the next day to thank me for the previous day, but as there was no spark for her she would continue her search. Again, fair enough.
Like #2:
A week later I went on an almost identical meet-up for coffee with another lady, again in Estepona, but at a different coffee shop. Another pleasant chat, but it was obvious that she not only didn't share my interests (dancing, music, cinema), she actually disliked them all. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffee, that she believed in equality, (but said it in an aggressive way), and got out her purse. Again, I thought, fair enough, we paid and left. This time it was I who messaged later to say for me there was no spark, but thanked her for the meet-up.
Like #3:
Another week passes and I got another meet-up for coffee, this time closer to home in La Cala. The date went well and I thought this time it may lead to a second date. However, when it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out, and she got her purse out too. This time I said nothing, looked at the bill and flicked through the notes in my wallet, watching what she would do. She also looked at the bill, and opened her purse. We both paid for our own coffees. The next day I got a stinging message, that said if I wanted to have more success with the ladies, I should be a gentleman and offer to pay for their coffees!
What is a guy to do?
Your pictures dates 5,4,2 yrs ago. To make an opinion i would like to hear from the other side. Up date your pictures just an observation..... when a woman agrees for a date sure she is willing to know u. Women mostly think with heart while men ..... are less emotional ... So tell us side u aren't telling ...
For me is not important who pays for coffee and if anyone voluntee too i hardly bother coz is irrelevant ...
For me is not important who pays for coffee and if anyone voluntee too i hardly bother coz is irrelevant ...
This is illegal in Spain and Shameon you .....
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Created: Aug 2019
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Last DisAgreed: Oct 2019
I live on the Costa del Sol, between Fuengirola and La Cala. When I joined CS I received a few likes, and over a one month period I liked back three of them.
Like #1:
The lady lived in Estepona, and we arranged to meet there for coffee at a cafe she liked that was local. The conversation went well and I thought things were progressing nicely. She didn't look much her profile picture, but I said nothing, and it was me who got a telling off for not looking as good as my profile photos. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffees, and that she did not like to be beholding to any man (she did seem to be put out by the fact I offered to pay). I thought, fair enough. Thought no more about it. She messaged me the next day to thank me for the previous day, but as there was no spark for her she would continue her search. Again, fair enough.
Like #2:
A week later I went on an almost identical meet-up for coffee with another lady, again in Estepona, but at a different coffee shop. Another pleasant chat, but it was obvious that she not only didn't share my interests (dancing, music, cinema), she actually disliked them all. When it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out and said 'I'll pay'. At this point she said that she wanted to pay for her coffee, that she believed in equality, (but said it in an aggressive way), and got out her purse. Again, I thought, fair enough, we paid and left. This time it was I who messaged later to say for me there was no spark, but thanked her for the meet-up.
Like #3:
Another week passes and I got another meet-up for coffee, this time closer to home in La Cala. The date went well and I thought this time it may lead to a second date. However, when it came time to leave I asked for the bill and got my wallet out, and she got her purse out too. This time I said nothing, looked at the bill and flicked through the notes in my wallet, watching what she would do. She also looked at the bill, and opened her purse. We both paid for our own coffees. The next day I got a stinging message, that said if I wanted to have more success with the ladies, I should be a gentleman and offer to pay for their coffees!
What is a guy to do?