Soul Mate? ( Archived) (15)

Jan 13, 2007 3:49 AM CST Soul Mate?
Funnybone
FunnyboneFunnybonePomerene, Arizona USA34 Threads 574 Posts
To me a soul mate is someone you meet and from that point on you live your life together, as one, 99.9 % is not 100.00 %. You die beside them and you die without them. That said when you meet them you know what life is all about. 99.9 % is better than the standard for US gold. What if you loose 99 % of your life fighting for that .1 %? Is that a soul mate?
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Jan 13, 2007 4:00 AM CST Soul Mate?
Lionhearted1967
Lionhearted1967Lionhearted1967London, Ontario Canada143 Threads 10 Polls 9,887 Posts
I do think that when you meet a soulmate that there will always be a connection. I think we have soulmates in this life.
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Jan 16, 2007 10:54 AM CST Soul Mate?
hscubagal1963
hscubagal1963hscubagal1963lohrville, Iowa USA2 Posts
To find ur soulmate u have to find ur best friend first If u really think about it in a relationship ur lover has to be ur best friend

But thats just my me..........
And as u can see i haven't found my best friend not yet anyway
GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONElove love love love
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Jan 16, 2007 10:56 AM CST Soul Mate?
hscubagal1963
hscubagal1963hscubagal1963lohrville, Iowa USA2 Posts
To find ur soulmate u have to find ur best friend first If u really think about it in a relationship ur lover has to be ur best friend

But thats just me..........
And as u can see i haven't found my best friend not yet anyway
GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONElove love love love
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Jan 16, 2007 10:57 AM CST Soul Mate?
Tumpa
TumpaTumpaottawa, Ontario Canada88 Threads 7,091 Posts
That would be good luck times two.
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Jan 16, 2007 11:04 AM CST Soul Mate?
RedHeadedTaurus
RedHeadedTaurusRedHeadedTaurusHere, Michigan USA17 Threads 1 Polls 8,455 Posts
laugh
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Jan 16, 2007 11:08 AM CST Soul Mate?
Sadeyes044
Sadeyes044Sadeyes044Tonawanda, New York USA4 Threads 416 Posts
Here is some information I found on the subject, btw I do believe as well!

Soulmates: Two people who are very compatible with each other in disposition, point of view, and sensitivity. Those who use this term in regard to primary relationships view it as a way of describing those who are meant for each other in a very special and unique way - almost as if they were spiritually or mystically connected.

What Kind of Soulmate Are You?
Not everyone is a hopeful romantic. Just as there are different types of personalities an temperments, we human beings seem to gravitate toward one of four clearly identifiable relationship approach types. We can't help it. Whatever the factors that go into shaping our view of love from childhood through adulthood; we still find ourselves clearly manifesting the characteristics below.

Look over the four types of soulmates. You may not be able to immediately identify yourself or your mate, so take some time to consider which one fits best. After doing this, take a further look at the other types. Perhaps you will be able to identify your mate. How do these soulmate types interact with each other? What would it be like for two people of the same type to be with each other? Could those who are so different from each other still be referred to as "soulmates?"
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Jan 16, 2007 11:10 AM CST Soul Mate?
Sadeyes044
Sadeyes044Sadeyes044Tonawanda, New York USA4 Threads 416 Posts
Continued:

After you've read the basic descriptions of the soulmate types, stay with us to consider some other important insights.


The Romantic Soulmate...
Seeks permanence and completeness in a loving, caring relationship. Feels a stronger sense of self-identity resulting from the relationship which produces fulfillment. Shares all aspects of life as expressions of togetherness from the mundane to the major. Focuses on finding ideas and ways to enhance the intensity and quality of the relationship.

The Sharing Soulmate...
Views sharing love and life with another as the best possible way to change and grow.
Senses completeness only when sharing self with another in a primary relationship. Perceives sharing dreams, plans, and projects as the means of demonstrating love. Sees intimate relationships as a way for two people to mutually improve and find purpose in their lives together.

The Constant Soulmate...
Sees consistency, faithfulness, and loyalty as the finest expression to demonstrate love to another. Values the other person's individuality by being available without feeling a need to always lead. Focuses on refining the relationship which results in a greater sense of self-worth.
Emphasizes the importance of both being dependable in the context of the relationship.

The Independent Soulmate...
Views a primary relationship as a partnership for each to help the other reach their full potential. Accepts their mates as seperate individuals and need the same kind of acceptance for themselves. Values his/her own autonomy and is sensitive to any hint of being controlled or coerced by others. Enjoys the intensity and novelty of the experience of love.-


Romantics - love to demonstrate their love and affection to and for their mates. However, the warning here is that, even when matched with another romantic, no one can tolerate such attention on a continual basis. The "24X7 Romantic" will seem absolutely wonderful at first (especially to someone who has been alone for awhile) but then begin to wear on the other person.


Independents are especially sensitive to this as they begin to feel guilty that they cannot return the love from a romantic as quickly or often as it is given to them (they will even misinterpret it as being controlled). As one woman expressed it, "One gets tired of lobster and crab legs after awhile. Most of us are more comfortable with a good hamburger."
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Jan 16, 2007 11:12 AM CST Soul Mate?
Sadeyes044
Sadeyes044Sadeyes044Tonawanda, New York USA4 Threads 416 Posts
Last but not least:

Independents are the antipathy of romantics. Their approach to a primary relationship is one of protecting their independency; even at the expense of the relationship if necessary. The need to keep a halo of space around them which cannot be too deeply penetrated. This is difficult to understand by the other soulmate types. Only another independent would find such an approach to love as being natural and comfortable when in a relationship with a same-type soulmate.

Yet, independents can be very enjoyable and exctiting people with whom to be involved. They are continually seeking ways to accomplish goals and projects. Their careers are their first loves. Should their chosen vocation or ongoing projects be the kind that their mates are truly interested in, all of the factors that involve them (e.g. going to the best restaurants to have dinners with a client or enjoying an evening out with another couple in the same business) can be a source of entertainment and, better yet, provide a bond between the independent and his/her soulmate. However, independents need to be careful that they are at least receptive to the demonstrations of love from their partners, if not as good at initiating them in the first place.
Work hard at your labors of love but take the time needed (and a little more thrown in for good measure) to spend quality time with your love.


Pulling All of This Together...
Space prohibits us from expanding upon all of the many facets and factors that occur when the four soulmate types mix and match with each other. In short, romantics and independents have to work harder than the rest to have a successful relationship. Sharers and constants can get along very well as long as they don't get in a contest to outdo each other. Two Romantics can make a powerful match as long as they don't burn each other out. Constants and Independents can get along fine as long as they both work harder at such things as showing affection and making sure they schedule time for each other. Independents can be most supportive of each other's interests as long as they don't completely ignore or alienate each other.
The main consideration here is that many people have good relationships and do not consider themselves to be soulmates. However, the point is that those who do strongly sense that their's is a very special relationship and would qualify as being true "soulmates" are motivated to work at developing and maintaining the best possible relationship between them and their loves.

Perhaps the bottom line is not which soulmate type you are as much as how willing you are to identify your approach to a primary relationship and your determination to work at it on an ongoing basis.

Whatever your soulmate type, rest assured that there is someone for everyone. None of us are perfect matches but we can enjoy a very good match if we determine within ourselves to either find the right person or truly learn everything we can about the one we are already with. A good soulmate is someone we know that we are meant to love and be loved in return. Finding such a person does not happen too many times in life. Only those who seek will find. yay kiss applause
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Jan 16, 2007 11:21 AM CST Soul Mate?
IrishLass1
IrishLass1IrishLass1Metairie, USA71 Threads 1,998 Posts
I am taking my time to find the one that will be there for the rest of this lifetime. I am in no rush, because to find that companion with the same values and on the same wave length is not easy. I want to find that person that I can cherish and that will cherish me in the good times and the bad. One that is will to wait out the rough spots, go through the bad times with me, as well as the easy times and the good times. Someone willing to work at the relationship no matter what it takes. A relationship with trust those times when we are seperated from one another by the different circumstances that come up in life.
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Jan 16, 2007 11:41 AM CST Soul Mate?
Abracadabra
AbracadabraAbracadabraHeaven, Pennsylvania USA69 Threads 3,302 Posts
Of all the one's Sadeyes listed I would say that I definitely fit into the "Sharing Soulmate" category the best without a doubt. I dream of a partner who's metaphorically joined at the hip. Certainly not in a demanding or expectant way, but simply because that's her desire too. After all, if she wasn't compatible with that she'd hardly be my soulmate right?

I dream of working at home, playing at home, and staying at home 90% of the time. That may sound boring to some, but if you're working at home that's over 50 percent of the time right there. And working at home doesn't necessarily mean spending every moment of the workday at home. For example, I work in crafts, and antique restoration, so much of the so-called working-at-home is actually spending an entire day just driving around to yard sales and antique stores. And those trips are always 'casual' which means that stopping in non-business related places along the way are commonplace.

In other words, a huge part of work is play.

I think the other thing people often object to when they hear the idea of spending so much time with their mate is that they imagine it being impossible to get away for a break. But that's certainly not the way it is. Either partner is free to go off on their own at anytime. It's just that most of the time they would simply chose to be together because that's what they are all about as "Sharing Soulmates". They simply have mutual goals and they are both interested in seeing them accomplished. They both view their partner as helping them.

Rather than viewing it as having a partner who always demands their presence, they view their partner as the person who is willing to spend time with them and not go running off on other unrelated interests.

In other words, I don't want a woman who views me as needed her to be by my side all the time. I'd rather have a woman who's seeking a man who will be by her side all the time. Then instead of feeling smothered or imprisoned by me, she'll feel that she's gaining the love and attention that she deserves.

That's what it means to be soulmates. Two people who both want the same thing so that they don't feel like they are being smothered or chained down by the other person, but rather they feel like they have finally found someone who cares enough about them to stick around instead of running of to fulfill their own separate agendas all the time.

Finally, I don't believe that there is only one 'soulmate' for each person. That makes no sense since the earth's population isn't 50/50 male/female anyway. Not to mention the children that die. Who's soulmate where they? If you only had one soulmate how can you be sure that he or she survived childhood? I believe that there are many people that we can be compatible with.

Although, I'm not so sure why I believe that because I'm having a hell of a time trying to find a "sharing soulmate".

The mere fact that it is recognized and described in the article that Sadeyes posted implies that it should be a fairly popular ideal though, so that's encouraging. thumbs up
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Jan 16, 2007 11:47 AM CST Soul Mate?
spidermiss2426
spidermiss2426spidermiss2426Maxton, NC, USA16 Threads 348 Posts
No.... I disagree. Its very unhealthy to rely on someone so much you "die without them" in your words. A romantic partner should compliment you, but YOU should be able to stand on your own two feel and be happy if you never found anyone-- meaning you should be happy about the person YOU ARE and NOT rely on love for happiness.
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Jan 16, 2007 2:50 PM CST Soul Mate?
I think we have several soul mates jmoyay
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Jan 16, 2007 3:55 PM CST Soul Mate?
Westdeck
WestdeckWestdeckAmsterdam, North Holland Netherlands82 Threads 1,649 Posts
Me and my ex Laila are soulmates. Divorced almost three years, but soulmates for ever, and the best of friends!
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Jan 16, 2007 4:05 PM CST Soul Mate?
Jess642
Jess642Jess642Agnes Water, Australia25 Threads 4,545 Posts
For me, I see the soul as complex, and accumulative of all experiences; some souls being older than dirt. With that in mind, there are many other souls who have a resonation to yours, and visa versa, so to say that I have one true soul mate, would be a farce for me. I have many soul mates, of both gender, and they are not to be confused with romantic compatabiltiy, or partners.

An ideal scenario would be to find a compatable romantic partner, whose soul resonates with mine....
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