Access to children ( Archived) (16)

For the past 6 years or so I been a sort of surrogate daddy to a little girl that has now turned 9, I dated her step mother for around 3 years on and off including us living together for around 2 years as a family when her step mother and father split up and when we ourselves split up I carried on seeing the little girl most weekends for 2 or 3 sleepovers and the occasional few days and nights during the school holidays for a further 3 years or so. I have been in the child's life just over 6 years now and we love and adore each other as if we were blood related and although she doesn't call me daddy she always introduces me as such to her friends.I have more or less taught her all the life skills she now has from reading and writing, tying her shoe laces, riding a bike, swimming, telling the time etc but now her step mother (who owes me 13,000 euros and refuses to pay me back) has decided I can no longer see the little girl and is keeping her away from me which is breaking my heart and is obviously not doing the child any good.

I am just wondering that although we weren't married and I am not blood related I still took the little girl on and brought her up as my own including living with her for 2 years as I say and doing all the daddy stuff from changing nappies and putting her to bed at night and reading bedtime stories to clothing, bathing, feeding her etc if there is there any action I can take or people I can talk to or am I entitled to any sort of access?

I would also like to point out that when her step mother went back to the UK on 2 different occasions once for 3 weeks and another time for a week she left the child with me and was very happy to do so.

At the end of the day her step mother and I have been arguing about the money she owes me for several months now and a few nasty names and words have been exchanged which is why she seems to have done this, it is the only way she can hurt me and she is using it to her full advantage..

Probably not, although I’m not in the know about your country’s laws. In The U.S. the other side of the coin is that if you discover later that a child you’ve been supporting as your own, married or not, is actually NOT yours, family court will still impose financial obligations for the child, on you. But it is extremely difficult (although there are a few rare cases) for a non- custodial “ friend” to be given any equitability concerning someone else’s child(ren), particularly if that parent is opposed to it. Mean, yes. Damaging to the child? Yes. Law is strict in family court here, specifically with minors. Men are frequently given the shaft…

Sorry for your hardship, by the way. Life is very, very tough. Choose your next partner very, very carefully. Research her. Separate the wheat from the chafe.

I agree with rohaan as you can't trust family court here in Australia either, the judges lie all the time and strip families of all there asserts when one parent objects, lawyers practicing in family law in Australia biggest thrives in the country...second to none and the judges are just bloated lawyers dressed in wigs

I thought this rather odd, but then realized she may be a widow, or, she was indeed awarded custody, which occurs here in the U.S. as well. But, primarily only step- mothers. As I said before, child relationships with men, even natural fathers, are seldom awarded in custody battles. Men/ fathers are not generally dealt with equitably in America. I don’t mean anything by this— it’s just the way it is here.