Why is it so easy to find fault in others? ( Archived) (24)

Apr 11, 2023 11:21 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 12:15 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Friendship4ever
Friendship4everFriendship4everSan Bernardino, California USA2 Threads 1,356 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
Because mist people lie to themselves.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 12:56 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Iyyov
IyyovIyyovPwetty Blue Planet, Washington USA3 Threads 253 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
Rather simple, for the most part. We don't find fault within ourselves, because we are mostly the product of our own choices. We agree with most of our own choices, that is why we make them. Thus, it is much more difficult to see any fault in them.

In others, we don't judge them by whether or not they made the proper choice for their own particular circumstances, we judge them against ourselves, and what we might have hypothetically done, in similar circumstances. It is almost certainly bound to be different, therefore, we become critical.

It is easier to recognize using the idiom, "we can't see the forest for the trees." Thus, on a hilltop and far away, the forest seems to be a forest. But standing in the middle, you only see a few individual trees. Similarly, our own faults are mere trees, whereas somebody else's faults become an entire forest, from afar. Easy to recognize the forest, from the hilltop, right? But, in reality, many of us can't see the forest, for the trees.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 3:30 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
I expect it's because we can get away from other people but you are always in the same place as yourself. Wallowing, beating yourself up, self-doubt.. all these things are good in a scientist or anywhere where life was truly asking you to be reasonable or intelligent, but in a state of nature those who beat themselves up got eaten by a bear. In the rough it's a survival disadvantage
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 3:50 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
I know they say that familiarity breeds contempt, and who isn't familiar with themselves? But it's not conservatives who really think that. Familiar breeds acceptance is the most likely. Familiarity breeds contempt will be in tandem with openness to experience and open-mindedness, the more curious end of the species which could be accused of novelty-seeking is more likely to find fault with itself and its own.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 4:12 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
To a conservative or even the male brain the love is to grow stronger as you become a habit to me. It falls closer to addiction a point that goes beyond familiarity breeds acceptance and into something quite nasty.

Familiarity breeds contempt is closer to women and to scientists and to liberals. Change is as good as a rest because you are much more tired of yourself and yours. It's more likely to die of curiosity, by putting its hand into the fire.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 4:37 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
Same story with the old. They too are relatively content to keep things as they are and are less easily swayed by the criticism anyone from the outside makes. To mellow with age, become more conservative over time are one and the same thing.

Women, children and curiosity are restless by comparison. Envy, the grass is always greener, that bloody snake in the garden of Eden.. that's familiarity breeds contempt.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 5:08 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
And all this as confused by the things people say. The fact that someone doesn't tell you about their self-doubt does not meant they don't have them. It can be the opposite. As a sweaty and anxious individual the main aim is not to appear sweaty and anxious. Our perceptions of someone can be clouded by the fact that they are a clever swine. Try looking a bit deeper
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 5:15 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
And another another thing, related to the above, is to massively overstate the happiness of others. Envy, keeping up appearances, social media give a perception of perfection in other's lives that is most assuredly not the case. We overestimate others when we think about their happiness, or at least our envy does
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 6:00 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Happygolucky4u
Happygolucky4uHappygolucky4uTreasure Coast, Florida USA25 Threads 4 Polls 6,241 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
Finding fault in ourselfs requires us to take a good look ourselfs and then to make a decision if we want to change. Some people are perfectly happy to keep their faults. I have some faults that I have willing through out the years come to accept. Then I have others after seeing them and taking ownership of them I realized were faults that I wanted to work on changing. They were stunting my growth in life. I do know it is easier for me to find fault in others because what they are doing is meshing into my life negatively. Life is strange some peoples faults I can work out and accept them for themselfs. Some I just create space between their life and mine. Kinda like you do you and I do me attitude. conversing It is not difficult for me to find fault in myself. What is difficult is for me to correct some that must go but yet I want to keep. wave
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 6:55 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
Quick tip - flatter your enemies. A rival alpha male is someone you speak positively about in front of the woman you're both trying to bang. Big him up as though as he was actually smaller than you. Don't lash out like a man who thinks this man is going to her off him. Flatter the great and the good when you are in competition, the spirit of healthy competition.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 6:56 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
ChesneyChrist: Quick tip - flatter your enemies. A rival alpha male is someone you speak positively about in front of the woman you're both trying to bang. Big him up as though as he was actually smaller than you. Don't lash out like a man who thinks this man is going to her off him. Flatter the great and the good when you are in competition, the spirit of healthy competition.
Going to take her*
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 7:23 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ChesneyChrist
ChesneyChristChesneyChristManchester, Greater Manchester, England UK7,144 Posts
Or any situation where the two of you want something, but only one of you can actually have that something, is no reason to discredit them.

They're not a bad person because you both want that one thing. Anyway the truth is that there actually is plenty more fish in the sea, don't give yourself to brutality and desperation believing that there's only one fish in the sea.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 10:09 AM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
It's easier to hold others at a higher standard than we hold ourselves. We often tend to get self-absorbed in our own shortcomings and willing to point them out in others.confused
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 12:14 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
I'd imagine most people know their faults, just don't too much to change them.

Others slap you in the face with them leaving you no choice but to call them out.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 12:17 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
I don't waste my time with other peoples faults, its more important I address my own.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 6:56 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
ThizButDat
ThizButDatThizButDatEast Coast Florida, Florida USA381 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
Fault finding or find fault – no diff. It’s an ego issue. Have to look at yourself first before nitpicking someone else. They could turn the tables and be worse. Who needs that. Childhood, control issue?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 10:13 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
PattycakesXO
PattycakesXOPattycakesXOMadison, Wisconsin USA18 Threads 114 Posts
Decent_Love: Why is it so difficult to find fault within ourselves?
The two objectives are both the same, with different targets.

Don't put that on anyone.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 12, 2023 10:21 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
Tony1613
Tony1613Tony1613Bertram, Texas USA6 Posts
People mostly do what they believe is the right thing to do. If they believed something they were doing was wrong, they wouldn't do it. Let me see if I can simplify this... Suppose that person A believes the right thing to do is paint everything blue, so he starts painting everything blue. Person B finds fault in what person A is doing, 'cause a stop sign, for example, is supposed to be painted red, yet person B painted it blue. Person B does not find that fault, 'cause he believes it is supposed to be painted blue.

So, we all have our own rule books, and each of us thinks our own rule book is correct. We judge ourselves based on our own rule books, not someone else's.

There's also the fact that people are just plain arrogant. I often see atheists say that anyone who believes in God is a complete idiot. If you point out to them that Einstein, who was considered the smartest man in the world by many, believed in God, their reply is that Einstein was an idiot. The possibility that they are wrong, is not something they seem capable of thinking. 'Course, people who believe in God are every bit as arrogant, and every other type of people as well.

We laugh at lemmings, for walking off a cliff to their deaths, yet we people do the same in so many ways. We laugh at ostriches for sticking their heads in the sand when danger approaches, yet we people do the same in so many ways. We are literally on the verge of extinction, because we all have our heads stuck in the sand. Yet, when someone tries to tell them that there's a solution, that can save us all, their response is to try to change that person's ways, try to correct that defect in that person which makes him try to save us all.

I've seen this in people, and I don't think they are the exception, rather I think they are the norm.

Tony
------ This thread is Archived ------
Apr 13, 2023 1:09 PM CST Why is it so easy to find fault in others?
rohaan
rohaanrohaanCoos Bay, Oregon USA228 Threads 10,419 Posts
MysteriousGirl80: I'd imagine most people know their faults, just don't too much to change them.

Others slap you in the face with them leaving you no choice but to call them out.
A really good adage:

"If thine adversary be weaker than thou, save him. If he be stronger, save thyself"
------ This thread is Archived ------
Post Comment - Post a comment on this Forum Thread

This Thread is Archived

This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.

« Go back to All Threads
Message #318

Stats for this Thread

1,524 Views
23 Comments
Created: Apr 2023
Last Viewed: 3 hrs ago
Last Commented: Apr 2023

Share this Thread

We use cookies to ensure that you have the best experience possible on our website. Read Our Privacy Policy Here