I have a dilemma (12)

OK here goes!! I have been having this flirtation with this gentleman from my town for about 3 months now. He comes to where I work regularly and we always have a good laugh and some flirtation. My difficulty is this, I know his wife left him back in August for another man and I know he is still dealing with this emotionally etc. They have 3 children together. I would like to offer him my friendship which may be a moot point but I am unsure of how I can do this without making him feel that I am after more then that. Although we do flirt I don't feel that he would be ready for anything more then a friendly ear who can sympathise with him as I to had a partner leave me for another person but I have had many years to deal with my emotions and we did not share any children together. He is such a funny sweet guy and I think anyone would be lucky to count him as a friend so what are your opinions as to just how I can approach this without making him feel that I am expecting more from him then he could give???

Hey Steph...good for you girlfriend...

First of all you ARE being what he probably needs right now...no pressure light flirting and a good laugh....If you know about his personal home life...then you have already made "ground" with him, I'm sure he doesn't go around telling everyone his wife left him for another man....

Is there something that you can get tickets to that you can casually mention that you have two tickets for something and would love to have him accompany you...again in a friendly no pressure manner...if not then i would suggest you turn the tables and make him feel YOU need a sympathetic ear instead of you willing to be his and just say to him, you could really use a good friend right now...would he be interested in lunch/dinner this weekend.... but give him a day don't say "sometime"...because remember you need that "friend" now....
Don't choose today (being Valentine) has too much connotation attached to this day...and don't make it a formal affair, again too much like a "date"....

Hey Stephanie! I think what Urs said is very appropriate...and your ice fishing idea is a really good one too...it has less 'date' innuendo attached to it than say dinner or a coffee, especially if you like ice fishing too!

Go for it....and have fun!! and a happy valentine's day to ya!

Cris

You could use the recent "freeze" and all the snow we're getting as a reason you're "antsy" to get out there and enjoy it all...ask if he'd be up for something like that (tell him you've been waiting all season for this....)

Thanks Cris I hope you have a great Valentines day as well. Urs Thanks for the support!!
Stephanie!!!

Just be yourself and be honest with him. Let him know you will be there as a good friend but nothing more and that he needs time to get over everything first before moving on on another stage.

Sounds like you are very understanding and have a good head on your shoulders. Stick to your guns and do what you think is right. Do not worry about what he will think and especialy do not let him make you feel guilty about anything. Not saying he will just sometimes some people can use that to get to someone. I know I speak from experience.

Good luck with everything! :o)

Sage advice thanks!!
Stephanie!!!

Your welcome my friend!

Sounds like you have some chemistry going on here.....don't break the momentum you are building.