If a man wants you.. ( Archived) (20)

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourselves for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, Why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. ! He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man. Oh Lord! If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two-way street.

You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary. Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and your always readily available to him- he takes it for granted. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others. Share this with other ladies..... You'll make someone SMILE, another

RETHINK her choices, and another woman PREPARE.



They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.


BY THE WAY, THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A MAN, SO TAKE A HINT...

very true Hz

wow that really made me think!!

So why is it so difficult to follow this advice???

I'm guessing because we often let our hearts rule instead of our heads.

Written by a man, that's very interesting. It didn't offer me any new advice, but, certainly confirmed my sagacity in maintaining my convictions.....I'm o.k. with not waivering, in desperation.

KnittinKitten

Duh!! Kitten, what's sagacity? (Belief? conviction?) Hate to say it, but in all my years I've never heard it before. I must live under a dam rock!!

Anyway, this is a GREAT words of wisdom to live by. Kitten is right that we sometimes let our hearts take over while our minds go to sleep! I've screwed up a couple of times in my life but really learned a lesson in both cases. At MY age I think it might be better to have a man in my life but not in my house!

i think its hard to follow because desperation and fear
can morph into blind optimism

and if a guy is old enough his red flags may have
faded to a pretty pink from being out in the sun alot-LOL
or are we choosing to wear rose colored glasses
(makes it harder to discern or easier to practice denial)
rather than inspecting and deducing what WE did
in the past that maybe we should change-to get a different result

sometimes rather than all defense
(behaving in new ways in the new relationship)
we can play a bit of offense b4 going in-

discipline isnt easy but always worth it...

I agree with all of it except this..."Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are..."...because if you truly are in love with him, he is the most important thing and you will put him above yourself without even knowing you have done it, and he will know it. JMO

If he is not into you, you will know it.

I found that it is better not to put someone else in front of you. Even with the teaching that life has gaven me, I still put them in front of me and made them important. Tell my eyes were open with the last two...and I am 53.... must be living under that rock.....NO matter what you do you can't make them love you..........



Mary