Dusty's house of Laughter..... ( Archived) (59)

Nov 13, 2007 11:40 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
DustyRose28
DustyRose28DustyRose28marshalltown, Iowa USA86 Threads 1,548 Posts
I want this thread to be nothing but fun. Make jokes, tell crazy stories, do whatever you want! Just tear it up and blow off the roof. I want to see some laughter on this site, so let's do it and just go absolutely insane! MAKE ME LAUGH! I dare ya! Do and say things that are just way out of the normal for you and let's see you get nutsy!cheering cheering cheering
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:42 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
candio
candiocandioYoungstown, Ohio USA27 Threads 747 Posts
Hard working ... Bob?

Bob works hard at the plant and spends two nights each week bowling and
plays golf every Saturday. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so
for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no,"
says Bob. "He's on my bowling team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Bob if he'd like his usual and
brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and
says, "How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"

"I recognize her, she's the waitress from the golf club. I always have a
Bud at the end of the 1st nine, honey. "

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Bob,
starts to rub herself all over him and says, "Hi Bobby. Want your usual
table dance, big boy?"

Bob's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

Bob follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door,
he jumps in beside her.

Bob tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for
someone else, but his wife is having none of it.

She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every 4 letter
word in the book.
The cabby turns around and says, "Geez Bob, you picked up a real b*tch this
time."
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:42 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
countryboy67
countryboy67countryboy67Kingston, Tennessee USA11 Threads 251 Posts
If I had known you were gonna do this I would have waited a few more minutes. Check out my "why she left" thread.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:42 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
vitaminehug
vitaminehugvitaminehugHelsinki, Southern Finland Finland2 Threads 113 Posts
My kind of thread! Finally! I've been waiting for days (not really) for such a thread to appear, and now, like a phoenix, rises from the ashes, the chaos thread.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:45 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
RillyNiceGuy
RillyNiceGuyRillyNiceGuySoutheast, Arkansas USA1,208 Threads 1 Polls 18,965 Posts
sigh Butt nutsy is normal for me!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:46 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
vitaminehug
vitaminehugvitaminehugHelsinki, Southern Finland Finland2 Threads 113 Posts
That actually made me lol.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:46 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
More more more...

(had a horrible day... need more)

grin
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:50 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
DustyRose28
DustyRose28DustyRose28marshalltown, Iowa USA86 Threads 1,548 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:50 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
nockuout1
nockuout1nockuout1waterbury, USA20 Threads 1,020 Posts
yeah...lol where is shine tonight?
...lol that was funny no?
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:54 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
Alainn
AlainnAlainnMonroeville, Pennsylvania USA20 Threads 553 Posts
Had I known I would have posted the Thanksgiving thing here too
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:55 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
countryboy67
countryboy67countryboy67Kingston, Tennessee USA11 Threads 251 Posts
An elderly gentleman purchased a corvette on his 60th birthday and left the dealership.

Driving down the road, he let his foot down on the gas until he was doing about 90 mph.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper closing fast. For just amoment he gunned the motor and hit almost 120 mph, then thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this crap!" So he slowed down and pulled over.

The trooper approached the car and said "Mister, I get off shift in 20 minutes, and I don't want the hassle of this paperwork. If you can give me a reason as to why you were driving like that that I haven't heard before, I let you off with a warning."

The man replied, "Six years ago my wife ran off with a state trooper. I was afraid you were bringing her back!"

The trooper said, "Have a nice day."
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:55 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
Funny, yes.
grin

(I just got finished filling out police reports for my stolen vehicle... *poo.. need more cheer.)
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:55 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
DustyRose28
DustyRose28DustyRose28marshalltown, Iowa USA86 Threads 1,548 Posts
not really and don't want to think about sigh
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:56 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
vitaminehug
vitaminehugvitaminehugHelsinki, Southern Finland Finland2 Threads 113 Posts
Wow, that's really bad. I hope your vehicle is an old rusty bicycle.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 13, 2007 11:59 PM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
(I wish it had been.)

Please don't let me bring things down in here.
I came in to soak in the cheer.


applause more moremoremore!
(pleeeeease)
grin
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 14, 2007 12:00 AM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
DustyRose28
DustyRose28DustyRose28marshalltown, Iowa USA86 Threads 1,548 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing I could have used this one the last time I got pulled overrolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 14, 2007 12:01 AM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
nockuout1
nockuout1nockuout1waterbury, USA20 Threads 1,020 Posts
God and I said this before I love you made up emoticons........

*poo stuff like that you are original..what a woman..
anyway I'm sorry to hear about your vehicle plz let us know what the outcome is...
I'm with you all the way on this..can't these theves get a G-damn job...geeez!!!hug
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 14, 2007 12:03 AM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
Alainn
AlainnAlainnMonroeville, Pennsylvania USA20 Threads 553 Posts
The following are actual answer phone messages recorded and verified by the world famous:-

INTERNATIONAL INSTITUTE OF
ANSWERPHONE MESSAGES:


My wife and I can’t come to the phone right
now, but if you leave your name and number
and any message, we’ll get back to you as we’re finished.

A is for Academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why I’m not here; So leave a message after the tone.

Hi, this is Tom: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my friend, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn’t lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are female, don’t worry, I have plenty of money.

Hi. Now you say something.

Hi. I’m not home at the moment, but my answer phone is. So you can talk to it after the tone.

Hello. I’m Tom’s answer phone, what are you?

Hello, if you leave a message, I’ll call you soon. If you leave a sexy message, I’ll call you straight back.

Hi. Johns’ answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with some of these magnets.

Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owner does not need sliding windows, or, a hot tub. His carpets are clean. He gives to charity through his office, and does not need his picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave your name and number, and he’ll get back to you.

This is not an answering machine. This is a Telepathic Thought Recording Device. After the tone, think about your name, number and your reason for calling, and I’ll think about calling you back.

If you are a burglar, then I’m probably at home, cleaning my weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, I’m probably not at home, and it’s safe for you to leave a message.

Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and used by me.

Hello. You’ve reached Jim and Sonya. We can’t pick up the phone right now, because we’re doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right…really slowly, so, leave a message and when we’ve finished brushing our teeth, we’ll call you back.

Hi. This is Tom. Please leave a message after the tone. If, however, you’ve dialled a wrong number, don’t worry, the phone was ringing anyway.
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 14, 2007 12:04 AM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
nockuout1
nockuout1nockuout1waterbury, USA20 Threads 1,020 Posts
dusty I'm sorry that was a little.no, alot rude you didn't deserve that I apologize...

but I don't have a joke to make you laugh,,sorry....
------ This thread is Archived ------
Nov 14, 2007 12:04 AM CST Dusty's house of Laughter.....
spiceygamble
spiceygamblespiceygambleNola, Louisiana USA40 Threads 3 Polls 5,583 Posts
*sluuurrrpp sluuurrrppp... sluurrrpppp...

Hear that?
It's the thieves... sucking donkey balls.

*snicker...
devil
------ This thread is Archived ------

This Thread is Archived

This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.

« Go back to All Threads
Message #318

Stats for this Thread

1,981 Views
58 Comments
by DustyRose28 (86 Threads)
Created: Nov 2007
Last Viewed: 3 hrs ago
Last Commented: Nov 2007

Share this Thread

back to top
We use cookies to ensure that you have the best experience possible on our website. Read Our Privacy Policy Here