Why do MEN stay??? ( Archived) (27)

For me it was hope that things would change for the better.
For better or worse I believe the words were in the vows

Wikked..I'll tell you why I think men stay...it's because they are "men" not quitters, willing to be men of their word, and not selfish, knowing splitting the family hurts the kids the worst. I believe real men, not men who are hopeless or stupid "stay" cause they understand and believe in the committment they made. I admire and appreciate a man with a big heart and a backbone to stand for what he believes in. I can show a man like that respect.

mostly for the kids. And of course so we don't have to pay ailomony

For the kids...

I stayed through 8 years of infidelity because I came from a 'broken home'. I wanted my kids to have a home with Mom & Dad still in it.

I think people also stay because they fear being alone or fear change. Those fears drive us to put up with things that we shouldn't and keep us in unhealthy relationships long past the recognition that it's not working any longer.

in my case, the thought of not seein gmy kids everyday.

Sorry peaches, but I think that's a crock - I can be a stand up guy, a man of my word and a man of value without having to stay in a relationship that has died - it has nothing to do with being a quitter or not. If a spouse has been unfaithful, you can't quit something you've been fired from. And too many unhappy people have stayed, locked in to a marriage based upon beliefs - that does nothing but cause resentments and that's how people get hurt. If you stay because you're afraid of pissing God off, that's one thing, but if you do it because some pulpit pounding, bible thumping representitive of some organized faith SAYS it's a sin to divorce, then you deserve all the pain in the world, since by doing so, you have just handed your life and happiness over to another human being. The zealots who twist the bible into their own manual for life and use it to scare their followers as they see fit, always have company because fear is the motivating factor. Get a divorce, go to Hell. Always a pleasure.

I haven't met a man yet who has stayed they always seem to run when the going gets rough. Women don't give up as easy we know you have to work on a relationship.

I do not believe you have met a real man yet. many lay claim to being a man. As I grown older I have come to the realization that most failed relationships are due to compromise (lack of). people, environments, finances, much like weather change. Expecting to have the woman or man not change is foolish, whether we admit it or not, just our presence without demand being in a relationship brings about change in us.
the thought of me being the same character five years from now scares me... just an opinion.

well this really is an informative thread... I had never thought about the guys point of view... Not that it has ever applied to me because every guy I've ever been with had ultimately left me after cheating repeatedly on me. Most guys see me as a live in who can cook and clean while they do as they wish and it is my own stupidity for allowing that to happen... So I've werked to change that lol... But... It is good to know that there are guys out there that do think with their heads and hearts.

That's great that they want to stay for the kids...i know i have made a lot of decisions based on what was good for the kids...but to stay and torment your partner day in day out?...JUST GO THEN!!