summer classes for men ( Archived) (52)

SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN AT
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETE
BY FRIDAY, AUGUST 17TH 2008

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THIER CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8

CLASS 1
HOW TO FILL UP THE ICE CUBE TRAYS
STEP BY STEP, WITH SLIDE PRESENTATION.
MEETS 4 WEEKS, MON. AND WED. FOR 2 HRS AT 7:00 PM.

CLASS 2
THE TOILET PAPER ROLL
DOES IT CHANGE ITSELF?
ROUND TABLE DISCUSSION
MEETS 2 WEEKS, SAT. AT 12:00 FOR 2 HRS

CLASS 3
IS IT POSSIABLE TO URINATE USING THE TECHNIQUE OF LIFTING THE SEAT AND AVOIDING THE FLOOR, WALLS AND NEARBY BATHTUB?
GROUP PRACTICE. MEETS 4 WEEKS, SAT. 10:00 PM. FOR 2 HRS.

CLASS 4
FUNDAMENTAL DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THE LAUNDRY HAMPER AND THE FLOOR. PICTURES AND EXPLANTORY GRAPHICS
MEETS SATURDAYS AT 2:00 PM FOR 3 WKS.

CLASS 5
LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS.
STARTING WITH LOOKING IN THE RIGHT PLACES AND NOT TURNING THE HOUSE UPSIDE DOWN WHILE SCREAMING.
OPEN FOREM MON. AT 8:00 PM, 2 HRS.

CLASS 6
HEALTH WATCH
BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH
GRAPHICS AND AUDIO TAPES.
THREE NIGHTS: MON., WED., FRI. AT 7:00 PM 2 HRS.

CLASS 7
REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST
REAL LIFE TESTIMONIALS
TUES. AT 6:00 PM LOCATION IS TO BE DETERMINED


CLASS 8
IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY WHILE SHE PARALLEL PARKS?
DRIVING SIMULATIONS
4 WKS, SATURDAYS NOON 2 HRS. HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION
RELAXATION EXERCISES, MEDITATION AND BREATHING TECHNIQUES.
MEETS 4 WKS, TUES. AND THURS. FOR 2 HRS. AT 7:00 PM

CLASS 9
HOW TO FIGHT CEREBRAL ATROPHY
REMEMBERING BITHDAYS, ANNIVERSARIES AND OTHER IMPORTANT DATES AND CALLING WHRN YOUR'E GOING TO BE LATE
CEREBRAL SHOCK THERAPY SESSIONS AND FULL LOBOTOMIES OFFERED
3 NIGHTS; MON., WED., FRI. AT 7:00 PM FOR 2 HRS

UPON COMPLETION OF ANY OF THE ABOVE COURSES, DIPLOMAS WILL BE ISSUED TO THE SURVIVORS.

I failed on registering..... ah well, would you pass me a beer and the TV remote please

Sign me up..... but is there a money back guarantee if I pass the course and still not keep a woman around long enough to even kiss her?

Zee

You know, that was to quick a reply to not be natural

I'm a Guy.... I'm convinced women can be too demanding...

I must immediately register! I "MUST" conform to the standards of a woman. I must "NOT" have feelings of my own. I must "NOT" be a complete entity without the approval of woman. I must NOT attempt any communication on my own, I must only communicate at the wish of woman...

Ooh your gonna get in to trouble...... quick you should

Classes for women

Class 1
Why do we even need icecube trays? Beer stays cold in the cooler.

Class 2
Toilet paper rolls last us a month.... so remebering only happens when the cabelas catalog runs out of pages.

Class 3
Men are a male animal... we too need to mark our territory when we pee.

Class 4
Laundry hamper? the clothes will still need to be dumped out to separate whites from colors... we are just bypassing a step.

Class 5
Being vocal while looking for something you have moved is the only time we get to control the conversation.

Class 6
Flowers are harmful to ones health.... once a guy starts bringing them they are expected all the time. So, how will we afford our new bass boat? Then what is the point of living?

Class 7
Real Men like gadgets... hence the GPS.

Class 8
Men don't paralell park and neither should women.... if you want us to go shopping with you, then let us drive.

Class 9
HOW TO FIGHT CEREBRAL ATROPHY
REMEMBERING BITHDAYS, ANNIVERSARIES AND OTHER IMPORTANT DATES AND CALLING WHRN YOUR'E GOING TO BE LATE
CEREBRAL SHOCK THERAPY SESSIONS AND FULL LOBOTOMIES OFFERED
3 NIGHTS; MON., WED., FRI. AT 7:00 PM FOR 2 HRS

OK, you win on this one... we do need to try harder


Zee

Pass the man a