I’ve been away for a while, but now I’m back and ready to rock you!
My question for you today is simply this: Do you demand what you deserve?
When was the last time you stood up for you and told a partner “I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways”.
I realized how I have felt like saying that a couple of times, but never did. And I think to myself why is that. Why do I make do with something ordinary when I deserve something extraordinary?
I tried it today. For a long time a mentor of mine has neglected his duties towards me. Promises where made that weren’t kept and I just crawled by the panels and hoped he would come around. But after thinking about what I truly deserve I drove by his home and stood there right on his doorstep on his private property and told him that he could do better and he better do it, because I didn’t deserve the way he has been treating me and I won’t ignore it any longer. If he couldn’t give me what I asked for our ways had to part. And he just stood there and listened and when I was done he nodded and said “Yes Valerie, you do deserve better and I can do better. I will have what you requested by Monday.”
I can’t begin to describe how good it felt. Not just that the things will get done, which is great. But the feeling of standing up for myself, drawing a line – for me! …it was really satisfying. It gave me a sense of self-esteem because I decided to respect myself enough to take action.
Sooner or later I will find someone and enter a relationship. When I do I will definitely not wait that long to show what I’m about and what I’m worth. It’s not that people shouldn’t know themselves, but sometimes they don’t realize that they are hurting. Sometimes they don’t realize the seriousness.
I, for one, will be more demanding in the future. I know what I want and I shouldn’t be afraid to voice it.
Are you good at standing up for yourself and voicing what you want?
hollandgirlSomewhere in Canada. B.C., British Columbia Canada4,464 posts
NorseMedic: I’ve been away for a while, but now I’m back and ready to rock you!
My question for you today is simply this: Do you demand what you deserve?
When was the last time you stood up for you and told a partner “I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways”.I realized how I have felt like saying that a couple of times, but never did. And I think to myself why is that. Why do I make do with something ordinary when I deserve something extraordinary?
I tried it today. For a long time a mentor of mine has neglected his duties towards me. Promises where made that weren’t kept and I just crawled by the panels and hoped he would come around. But after thinking about what I truly deserve I drove by his home and stood there right on his doorstep on his private property and told him that he could do better and he better do it, because I didn’t deserve the way he has been treating me and I won’t ignore it any longer. If he couldn’t give me what I asked for our ways had to part. And he just stood there and listened and when I was done he nodded and said “Yes Valerie, you do deserve better and I can do better. I will have what you requested by Monday.”
I can’t begin to describe how good it felt. Not just that the things will get done, which is great. But the feeling of standing up for myself, drawing a line – for me! …it was really satisfying. It gave me a sense of self-esteem because I decided to respect myself enough to take action.Sooner or later I will find someone and enter a relationship. When I do I will definitely not wait that long to show what I’m about and what I’m worth. It’s not that people shouldn’t know themselves, but sometimes they don’t realize that they are hurting. Sometimes they don’t realize the seriousness.
I, for one, will be more demanding in the future. I know what I want and I shouldn’t be afraid to voice it.
Are you good at standing up for yourself and voicing what you want?
I am that today YES! This was not always so. Married the man I met when I was fourteen. Never realized that he was controling me. I now recognize this pretty soon. In Holland we say; "No one eats the cheese of my bread" lol not when I am watching you your not. Yes I stand up for myself even when I am waiting for service and someone tries to get ahead of me. It is Not going to happen as I will speak up. Not doing so comes from having low-self esteem. Had lots of that in the past. Not today. Yes I deserve the best. My youngest sister is somewhat spoiled the one above her is not. I told someone that the sweet sister would end up with more someday. I was told this is not so. Your younger sister will because she demands more. Yess right! Keep up the good works! Jenny
I’ve been away for a while, but now I’m back and ready to rock you!
My question for you today is simply this: Do you demand what you deserve?
When was the last time you stood up for you and told a partner “I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways quote]
This is exactly why I have quit looking for women in this room. Exactly!! Most of you have such a high opinion of yourselves and such inflated egos, that it makes the average man feel they are never worthy of you. Inadequate is maybe a better word.
The better question might be: Do you demand what you THINK you deserve?
If some of you demanded what you deserve...you would be alone the rest of your life. I have no time or inclination for vanity and inflated egos
For me demanding isn't the right word....but if you hurt me....then we discuss it and reach a compromise about next time or similar situations...if it happens again...then as far as I am concerned the compromise or talk was just words and then I am through talking....and it's see ya!!!!!!!! (could be more than once...but I am to the point not likely) because I am done wasting my time!!!!!
What I do expect is to be treated with love and respect and kindness and if you can't do that...then you have no place in my life!!!!!!!!
I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways”.
No, because, that is a veiled threat.
No negotiation, no consideration.
Not how I operate in a relationship.
All very well knowing what we are worth and what we deserve, but that is a combative and stubborn attitude.
How would you feel, if your partner said that to you?
Where would you go?
Standing up for oneself is one thing, but in a relationship, you should not have to 'stand up' for yourself, you should be able to express yourself, as your partner should.
Good to see you.
Am I good at voicing what I want? Yes, but I do it without a threat.
I talk it through.
If my partner does not, then he is not the man for me.
I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways”.
No, because, that is a veiled threat.
No negotiation, no consideration.
Not how I operate in a relationship.
All very well knowing what we are worth and what we deserve, but that is a combative and stubborn attitude.
How would you feel, if your partner said that to you?
Where would you go?
Standing up for oneself is one thing, but in a relationship, you should not have to 'stand up' for yourself, you should be able to express yourself, as your partner should.
Good to see you.
Am I good at voicing what I want? Yes, but I do it without a threat.
I talk it through.
If my partner does not, then he is not the man for me.
HzChld: You are very wise dear friend! It is simply conversations.
hello kitten
i paid good money to learn this way of management down your way actually-- then i paid a gob more-well i had my employer pay for me to become a certified facilitator
just a helpful helpful tool for me
and god knows ill take any serenity wherever i can get it
Hugz_n_Kissez: Here's another thought...you're probably as worthy and deserving in a relationship as what you're willing to give to the other person!!!!!!!!
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
My question for you today is simply this: Do you demand what you deserve?
When was the last time you stood up for you and told a partner “I deserve this! You must give it to me or we’ll have to part our ways”.
I realized how I have felt like saying that a couple of times, but never did. And I think to myself why is that. Why do I make do with something ordinary when I deserve something extraordinary?
I tried it today. For a long time a mentor of mine has neglected his duties towards me. Promises where made that weren’t kept and I just crawled by the panels and hoped he would come around.
But after thinking about what I truly deserve I drove by his home and stood there right on his doorstep on his private property and told him that he could do better and he better do it, because I didn’t deserve the way he has been treating me and I won’t ignore it any longer. If he couldn’t give me what I asked for our ways had to part.
And he just stood there and listened and when I was done he nodded and said “Yes Valerie, you do deserve better and I can do better. I will have what you requested by Monday.”
I can’t begin to describe how good it felt. Not just that the things will get done, which is great. But the feeling of standing up for myself, drawing a line – for me! …it was really satisfying. It gave me a sense of self-esteem because I decided to respect myself enough to take action.
Sooner or later I will find someone and enter a relationship. When I do I will definitely not wait that long to show what I’m about and what I’m worth. It’s not that people shouldn’t know themselves, but sometimes they don’t realize that they are hurting. Sometimes they don’t realize the seriousness.
I, for one, will be more demanding in the future. I know what I want and I shouldn’t be afraid to voice it.
Are you good at standing up for yourself and voicing what you want?