those that are separated/divorced? ( Archived) (12)

A recent conversation made me think about this...how is your relationship with your 'inlaws'?. I am still very friendly with mine.they babysit, or i will meet for a coffee, they will drop in on the way back to dublin from the ferry etc. are you still friendly with yours? I would hate to think i had to stop being friends with them,......their son/brother( ie my ex) and I are civil, and making the effort to get along for the sake of harmony and the kids.

Do you think there is anything wrong with keeping close ties with my kids uncles/aunties/grandma? I think it is wrong to cut them out of their lives. i suppose i am lucky that all my inlaws are lovely, and that my husband and I don't hate each other- just realised that wI didn't want to be married to him any more. I'm sure it makes it so much harder when things are not like that. what's your experience. ?

I've been separated for around 28 years and still
in close contact with my inlaws, we get on great.
I have virtually no contact with my 'wife' though.

Don't have in laws yet but I would think it's a very mature and responsable thing to do, staying in touch with them.

And it also gives the children a healthy family environment.

I get on very well with my ex's parents. They have the kids most Saturday mornings & take them out sometime during the week when they're on school holidays. I know I can ask them for help anytime I need it.

I get on with the ex reasonably well too now. But to be honest I probably get on withe his parents better.

I'm very lucky... I'm still very close to my Outlaws (as I like to call them now)

Still socialise as friends as well as family.. spend Christmas day there .. go out for Sunday lunch.. bikes rides. BBQs.. etc.


I can ask them for help with ANYTHING .. they are great friends to me as well as Outlaws.

They still introduce me as their daughter in law.. even though it was about 6yrs since we got divorced.

Oo and still buy me LOVELY BDay and Christmas pressies..

Mine invited BF I was seeing around for dinner with me..

Yep.. it does.. MUCH nicer for them.

I know sometimes it's not possible..

or the Inlaws are not people you want around your kids anyway.. (some are NOT great)

But if you are lucky enough that it does work.. I think its an excellent example to the children too.

i'm glad to hear others say this- i really like my outlaws ( i say that too!! ) and it was me that always maintained contact with them anyway while we were together. I would like to think that even if we both met someone else, that we could still do that - i hoep it never gets to the 'nasty' stage- it shouldn't, we both just want the other to be happy- I can't be doing with all that-'you can't talk to x,y and z because i don't like them', whether in marriage or just friends- i choose my own friends

True!
And I aplaud you guys for doing that, probably the normal reaction would be to stay away from everything that has to do with your ex...regardless of how kids would be affected.

It must be a nice feeling for you too, having an extra set of family to count on ( provided they are nice people)