Humor is the best remedy ( Archived) (13)

Sep 4, 2008 8:56 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
dillydally
dillydallydillydallyBehind the hills and Burns ..., Strathclyde, Scotland UK57 Threads 2,697 Posts
I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades...or a game of fake heart attack.
-- Demetri Martin

So a man jumps into a taxi and says "King Arthur's close" and the taxi driver says, "don't worry we'll lose him at the next lights".
-- Tommy Cooper

My wife was fitted with a coil. For about 18 months I hated it! She used to pick up CB signals.
-- Bob Monkhouse

In awe I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebon void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang forever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought...I must put a roof on this lavatory.
-- Les Dawson

I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.
-- Billy Connolly

A man commented to his lunch companion: "My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire." "You're lucky," sighed the companion. "My wife dreams that in the daytime."
-- Sam Ewing

If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that!
-- Milton Jones

I know why Superman left Krypton. Earth was the only place he could get steroids!
-- Milton Berle

A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back!
-- Jerry Dennis

I thought coq au vin was love in a lorry.
-- Victoria Wood

I was born in Alabama. I was raised in Georgia. I'm so Southern I'm related to myself. I have a 12-year-old daughter. She takes after my daddy. She ought to. She's his.
-- Brett Butler

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
-- Emo Philips

Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
-- Carl Zwanzig

When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead.
-- Jeff Shaw


laugh
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 8:59 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
mastic55
mastic55mastic55Long Island, New York USA167 Threads 6,859 Posts
Nice,,,,,,,,,,the ring one was the best.thumbs up
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:04 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
dillydally
dillydallydillydallyBehind the hills and Burns ..., Strathclyde, Scotland UK57 Threads 2,697 Posts
mastic55: Nice,,,,,,,,,,the ring one was the best.



hey you wave



laugh that and the lavatory one for me
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:07 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
Xtabentun
XtabentunXtabentunOntario, Canada18 Threads 1,722 Posts
The lavatory, the trip to China, the ring...I loved most the Bike one...thought it's brilliant idea rolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:08 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
mastic55
mastic55mastic55Long Island, New York USA167 Threads 6,859 Posts
dillydally: hey you
that and the lavatory one for me
With a roof rolling on the floor laughing thumbs up
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:09 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
wixomwizard
wixomwizardwixomwizardWixom, Michigan USA35 Threads 3,636 Posts
When I was young I was so homely, my mother would tie a ham bone around my neck, to get the dog to play with me,professor
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:11 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
Xtabentun
XtabentunXtabentunOntario, Canada18 Threads 1,722 Posts
wixomwizard: When I was young I was so homely, my mother would tie a ham bone around my neck, to get the dog to play with me,


scold No, that's sad! blues Really!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:13 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
wixomwizard
wixomwizardwixomwizardWixom, Michigan USA35 Threads 3,636 Posts
My brother is so homely now, his face looks like it caught fire and was put out by the Detroit lionsbanana
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:14 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
dillydally
dillydallydillydallyBehind the hills and Burns ..., Strathclyde, Scotland UK57 Threads 2,697 Posts
wixomwizard: When I was young I was so homely, my mother would tie a ham bone around my neck, to get the dog to play with me,



Think you should just go to bed now tongue
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:36 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
mylifewithu
mylifewithumylifewithuSpringfield, Missouri USA174 Threads 23,670 Posts
Funny stuff , thanks for sharing!!applause rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:44 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
wixomwizard
wixomwizardwixomwizardWixom, Michigan USA35 Threads 3,636 Posts
mylifewithu: Funny stuff , thanks for sharing!!


you think I'm kidding, don't you?blues moping wink grin
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:45 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
mylifewithu
mylifewithumylifewithuSpringfield, Missouri USA174 Threads 23,670 Posts
wixomwizard: you think I'm kidding, don't you?
Sorry I was laughing at the jokes at the beginning of the thread.comfort hug laugh laugh
------ This thread is Archived ------
Sep 4, 2008 9:52 PM CST Humor is the best remedy
katiecharlyn
katiecharlynkatiecharlyndublin, Georgia USA8 Threads 2,748 Posts
dillydally: hey you
that and the lavatory one for me
rolling on the floor laughing funny!
------ This thread is Archived ------
Post Comment - Post a comment on this Forum Thread

This Thread is Archived

This Thread is archived, so you will no longer be able to post to it. Threads get archived automatically when they are older than 3 months.

« Go back to All Threads
Message #318

Stats for this Thread

595 Views
12 Comments
by dillydally (57 Threads)
Created: Sep 2008
Last Viewed: Mar 17
Last Commented: Sep 2008

Share this Thread

We use cookies to ensure that you have the best experience possible on our website. Read Our Privacy Policy Here