expiration date (27)
keytonePortland, Oregon USA36 Threads 3 Polls 1,686 PostsDo you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
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'Mornin' Bettis! 
Sounds like you've summed up the way quite a few of us feel. Granted, I've been lucky enough to find the gal I was looking for, but still I understand perfectly what you're saying.
To tell the absolute truth, in my case at least, these feelings also apply to real life. In fact, I can't remember a time when I couldn't have applied the exact same scenario - in varying degrees - to all of existance. There are times, it seems, when we're surrounded by friends and support and things just couldn't get any better. Then, a week later, you wake up and realize that something's just a little different and it gradually occurs to you that your friends, job, family, favorite pasttimes, etc... aren't quite as close and dear as they were. And you can't quite figure out if you've changed, or they have.
The heck of it is that there's not a whole lot that you can do about this whole "river of life" thing except somehow muddle through until things begin to get on an even keel. Of course you could look for "smoother waters" but even that is only a temporary fix and it seems best just to paddle a little harder or a little less hard or work on thickening your hull or maybe even pull into the mouth of a creek and rest a bit.
I wish you luck, Bettis, and I apologize for the corny sailing metaphor, but I've got canoeing on the brain this morning. It'll sort it'self out eventually!
Sounds like you've summed up the way quite a few of us feel. Granted, I've been lucky enough to find the gal I was looking for, but still I understand perfectly what you're saying.
To tell the absolute truth, in my case at least, these feelings also apply to real life. In fact, I can't remember a time when I couldn't have applied the exact same scenario - in varying degrees - to all of existance. There are times, it seems, when we're surrounded by friends and support and things just couldn't get any better. Then, a week later, you wake up and realize that something's just a little different and it gradually occurs to you that your friends, job, family, favorite pasttimes, etc... aren't quite as close and dear as they were. And you can't quite figure out if you've changed, or they have.
The heck of it is that there's not a whole lot that you can do about this whole "river of life" thing except somehow muddle through until things begin to get on an even keel. Of course you could look for "smoother waters" but even that is only a temporary fix and it seems best just to paddle a little harder or a little less hard or work on thickening your hull or maybe even pull into the mouth of a creek and rest a bit.
I wish you luck, Bettis, and I apologize for the corny sailing metaphor, but I've got canoeing on the brain this morning. It'll sort it'self out eventually!
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keytone: Do you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
I actually left the site for nearly 2 years for that reason. It was getting a bit disheartening reading the same old stuff, over and over again and watching the personalities come and go. Although I was surrounded by friends, I was feeling a bit left behind.
To be honest though, I was too dependant on the site for hunan contact that I should have been getting outside. You mention changing and learning which I would call growth. Maybe it's time to take that wisdom and strike out anew at the world. It was certainly true in my case.
I don't know about the stigma thing but nowadays, I don't jump at every chance to post in here just to be part of the virtual crowd. If a post interests me, like this one, I'll put in my tuppence worth otherwise I just drop in and out from time to time.
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The_Kansan: 'Mornin' Bettis!
Sounds like you've summed up the way quite a few of us feel. Granted, I've been lucky enough to find the gal I was looking for, but still I understand perfectly what you're saying.
To tell the absolute truth, in my case at least, these feelings also apply to real life. In fact, I can't remember a time when I couldn't have applied the exact same scenario - in varying degrees - to all of existance. There are times, it seems, when we're surrounded by friends and support and things just couldn't get any better. Then, a week later, you wake up and realize that something's just a little different and it gradually occurs to you that your friends, job, family, favorite pasttimes, etc... aren't quite as close and dear as they were. And you can't quite figure out if you've changed, or they have.
The heck of it is that there's not a whole lot that you can do about this whole "river of life" thing except somehow muddle through until things begin to get on an even keel. Of course you could look for "smoother waters" but even that is only a temporary fix and it seems best just to paddle a little harder or a little less hard or work on thickening your hull or maybe even pull into the mouth of a creek and rest a bit.
I wish you luck, Bettis, and I apologize for the corny sailing metaphor, but I've got canoeing on the brain this morning. It'll sort it'self out eventually!
it's a good metaphor.Sounds like you've summed up the way quite a few of us feel. Granted, I've been lucky enough to find the gal I was looking for, but still I understand perfectly what you're saying.
To tell the absolute truth, in my case at least, these feelings also apply to real life. In fact, I can't remember a time when I couldn't have applied the exact same scenario - in varying degrees - to all of existance. There are times, it seems, when we're surrounded by friends and support and things just couldn't get any better. Then, a week later, you wake up and realize that something's just a little different and it gradually occurs to you that your friends, job, family, favorite pasttimes, etc... aren't quite as close and dear as they were. And you can't quite figure out if you've changed, or they have.
The heck of it is that there's not a whole lot that you can do about this whole "river of life" thing except somehow muddle through until things begin to get on an even keel. Of course you could look for "smoother waters" but even that is only a temporary fix and it seems best just to paddle a little harder or a little less hard or work on thickening your hull or maybe even pull into the mouth of a creek and rest a bit.
I wish you luck, Bettis, and I apologize for the corny sailing metaphor, but I've got canoeing on the brain this morning. It'll sort it'self out eventually!
I also agree about "real life" in fact I have been doing more things in the "real world" lately...though this has a certain current it also seems to have that goldfish bowl feel as well. Sometimes you just hope you aren't the next to be "flushed"
anyway...thanks for your input,,,and that really is great that you met your special love.
;-}
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Godsgift: I actually left the site for nearly 2 years for that reason. It was getting a bit disheartening reading the same old stuff, over and over again and watching the personalities come and go. Although I was surrounded by friends, I was feeling a bit left behind.
To be honest though, I was too dependant on the site for hunan contact that I should have been getting outside. You mention changing and learning which I would call growth. Maybe it's time to take that wisdom and strike out anew at the world. It was certainly true in my case.
I don't know about the stigma thing but nowadays, I don't jump at every chance to post in here just to be part of the virtual crowd. If a post interests me, like this one, I'll put in my tuppence worth otherwise I just drop in and out from time to time.
I appreciate your post, I really do.To be honest though, I was too dependant on the site for hunan contact that I should have been getting outside. You mention changing and learning which I would call growth. Maybe it's time to take that wisdom and strike out anew at the world. It was certainly true in my case.
I don't know about the stigma thing but nowadays, I don't jump at every chance to post in here just to be part of the virtual crowd. If a post interests me, like this one, I'll put in my tuppence worth otherwise I just drop in and out from time to time.
;-}
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I know what you mean, Bettis
I'm yesterday's news on here too
So many friends have gone.
Perhaps that is the way it should be.
The real world is not so bad, you know
I'm yesterday's news on here too
So many friends have gone.
Perhaps that is the way it should be.
The real world is not so bad, you know
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arabella: I know what you mean, Bettis
I'm yesterday's news on here too
So many friends have gone.
Perhaps that is the way it should be.
The real world is not so bad, you know
yeah,,you're obviously right about the world...it isn't so bad really.. I think part of it is not wanting to let go of certain things. And though the "things" lol, may have moved on you seem to be drawn in like a "poker machine" thinking your "number will come up again. (I dont play them, but have seen the affect)I'm yesterday's news on here too
So many friends have gone.
Perhaps that is the way it should be.
The real world is not so bad, you know
Thanks Dear.
;-}
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Winds of change.
Shifting sands of dunes.
Ebb and flow of the tide.
Life is the same. The labels we wear will bring us down if we let them.
None of you are above are past your expirary date.
Arabella you always make me think or laugh.
Keytone I always like to read you.
Kansan too, I enjoy reading you.
Godsgift, I don't know you unless you were known under a different name.
I don't always get what everyone says some is lost in translation or
in my case the slip between what's in my head and the typed words.
So many have gone or come and gone as has been said.
I don't fit the way I used to, but then I don't spend the time here
that I used to.
But to be honest it doesn't bother me, we all do have real lives this
is just a private part of that.
A lot of it was a therapy for me that I don't need now.
Although saying that we are all (hopefully) still changing and
evolving as people.
Funny although many I knew have gone, the new ones have charaters
good and bad that echo others sometimes.
Some gone are in no way like anyone else, gems like none other.
We don't like everyone here and many may not like us,
but that too is the same as offline.
Shifting sands of dunes.
Ebb and flow of the tide.
Life is the same. The labels we wear will bring us down if we let them.
None of you are above are past your expirary date.
Arabella you always make me think or laugh.
Keytone I always like to read you.
Kansan too, I enjoy reading you.
Godsgift, I don't know you unless you were known under a different name.
I don't always get what everyone says some is lost in translation or
in my case the slip between what's in my head and the typed words.
So many have gone or come and gone as has been said.
I don't fit the way I used to, but then I don't spend the time here
that I used to.
But to be honest it doesn't bother me, we all do have real lives this
is just a private part of that.
A lot of it was a therapy for me that I don't need now.
Although saying that we are all (hopefully) still changing and
evolving as people.
Funny although many I knew have gone, the new ones have charaters
good and bad that echo others sometimes.
Some gone are in no way like anyone else, gems like none other.
We don't like everyone here and many may not like us,
but that too is the same as offline.
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"There's talk on the street,
it's there to remind you,
that it doesn't really matter
which side you're on.
You're walking away and they're talking behind you .
They will never forget you 'til somebody new comes along.
There's a new kid in town......."
~Eagles~
it's there to remind you,
that it doesn't really matter
which side you're on.
You're walking away and they're talking behind you .
They will never forget you 'til somebody new comes along.
There's a new kid in town......."
~Eagles~
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Bettis ur a sound guy 
don't give up hope my freind
just don't beat ur self up over this place
no one said this place was perfect u've tried and that what count's
give ur self 100% percent for effort......
lord knows we all try.....
just keep the home fire's burning and maybe one day u'll find what ur are looking for in life....
love is a funny old game which we all play young or old
so chin up my friend
don't give up hope my freind
just don't beat ur self up over this place
no one said this place was perfect u've tried and that what count's
give ur self 100% percent for effort......
lord knows we all try.....
just keep the home fire's burning and maybe one day u'll find what ur are looking for in life....
love is a funny old game which we all play young or old
so chin up my friend
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keytone: Do you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
Hey Bettis
The last two years have seen many changes for me anyway and having all of you here has been my sanity in a way - its been a really odd couple of years which have seen a lot of my opinions go from erroneous to cemented............... and vice versa too at times haha
I know some of the stuff i say on various threads can sound bizarre but its as much about self discovery as the need to get things said............
I think Ive learnt to lose the 'urgency' to escape 'aloneness' cos I cant be alone when I can interract with all of you........
may we all long continue to help each other along the way.........
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keytone: Do you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
I think my time on here expired about 18 years ago. I just hang around in an haunting fashion now as part of the forum furniture & to keep the emoticons company 
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keytone: Do you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
I do indeed think you may have a point there, Bettis. Nothing is forever, everything has a lifespan. Why should time on here be any different? Although, there is not likely to be a clear and definitive timescale, one may likely feel they have "outstayed their welcome", as it were.
Perhaps I have now become a "veteran" of the Forums....??
I have been here..... errmmm *cough* you wouldn't believe me if I told you, suffice to say I do believe I am viewed as having become part of the furniture....
Never mind.... my time here is almost done anyways. I am fortunate to have met and remained friends with some fabulous people and without CS I wouldn't have had that wonderful opportunity, would I?
Bloody good thread, love!!
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I have been on this site for about 2 years or so, I've met some truly wonderful people. I have been blessed recently to have met the love of my life and don't feel the need to delete my profile. I will stay on this site because of the forums and all the great friends I have made.
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Yes, in the great scheme of things, maybe it is behoven to us to remember that all of us here will come, and then we will go....this is not forever....people who are regulars here, almost, or in fact part of the furniture, may not be here a year from now, or 3 months from now....it's called natural attrition...either by design or circumstance...
....so ya better bloody appreciate us while we're still here, dammit!!
....so ya better bloody appreciate us while we're still here, dammit!!
roseofsharon: I do indeed think you may have a point there, Bettis. Nothing is forever, everything has a lifespan. Why should time on here be any different? Although, there is not likely to be a clear and definitive timescale, one may likely feel they have "outstayed their welcome", as it were.
Perhaps I have now become a "veteran" of the Forums....??
I have been here..... errmmm *cough* you wouldn't believe me if I told you, suffice to say I do believe I am viewed as having become part of the furniture....
Never mind.... my time here is almost done anyways. I am fortunate to have met and remained friends with some fabulous people and without CS I wouldn't have had that wonderful opportunity, would I?
Bloody good thread, love!!
Perhaps I have now become a "veteran" of the Forums....??
I have been here..... errmmm *cough* you wouldn't believe me if I told you, suffice to say I do believe I am viewed as having become part of the furniture....
Never mind.... my time here is almost done anyways. I am fortunate to have met and remained friends with some fabulous people and without CS I wouldn't have had that wonderful opportunity, would I?
Bloody good thread, love!!
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roseofsharon: I do indeed think you may have a point there, Bettis. Nothing is forever, everything has a lifespan. Why should time on here be any different? Although, there is not likely to be a clear and definitive timescale, one may likely feel they have "outstayed their welcome", as it were.
Perhaps I have now become a "veteran" of the Forums....??
I have been here..... errmmm *cough* you wouldn't believe me if I told you, suffice to say I do believe I am viewed as having become part of the furniture....
Never mind.... my time here is almost done anyways. I am fortunate to have met and remained friends with some fabulous people and without CS I wouldn't have had that wonderful opportunity, would I?
Bloody good thread, love!!
Perhaps I have now become a "veteran" of the Forums....??
I have been here..... errmmm *cough* you wouldn't believe me if I told you, suffice to say I do believe I am viewed as having become part of the furniture....
Never mind.... my time here is almost done anyways. I am fortunate to have met and remained friends with some fabulous people and without CS I wouldn't have had that wonderful opportunity, would I?
Bloody good thread, love!!
I can soooooo relate...
While I didn't meet my "soulmate" here...I've made many great friends here, and never want to loose touch with them.
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keytone: Do you think that it is possible,,,or maybe even probable that if you have been on a site {this one} for lets say over a year, that though you may be changing and learning that people may still see you in a way that just "Labels" you?? I have thought about this about myself. Though I have been here for two years plus, I have went through many changes....I have felt the friendly chat and support of some and I also have felt a "cool cold" kind of bad feeling,,as though maybe my time has expired. I feel that stigma and then there is the unsaid,,,behind the scene "chat". I even wonder if some people might be more attracted to people that are not active in the forum. ...anyway, just some thinking I have been doing.
I'm way past my expiry date....but you can never be too far past to make new friends...
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Lagoona22: Yes, in the great scheme of things, maybe it is behoven to us to remember that all of us here will come, and then we will go....this is not forever....people who are regulars here, almost, or in fact part of the furniture, may not be here a year from now, or 3 months from now....it's called natural attrition...either by design or circumstance...
....so ya better bloody appreciate us while we're still here, dammit!!
....so ya better bloody appreciate us while we're still here, dammit!!
You tell 'em, bud!!! 
So, Hugz..... do you mean we should stay here indefinitely?? Otherwise, if I've become part of the furniture AND I get a choice (which I strongly suspect I don't), I choose to be the armchair (soft, squidgy and embracing??)......
That doesn't make me sound "fat" does it??!!
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roseofsharon: You tell 'em, bud!!!
So, Hugz..... do you mean we should stay here indefinitely?? Otherwise, if I've become part of the furniture AND I get a choice (which I strongly suspect I don't), I choose to be the armchair (soft, squidgy and embracing??)......
That doesn't make me sound "fat" does it??!!
So, Hugz..... do you mean we should stay here indefinitely?? Otherwise, if I've become part of the furniture AND I get a choice (which I strongly suspect I don't), I choose to be the armchair (soft, squidgy and embracing??)......
That doesn't make me sound "fat" does it??!!
Yes....forever and ever and ever...until we all get find the loves of our lives anyway and then we can all still pop in to visit each other....we're all armchairs...no not fat...just makes us comfy....
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I'm attracted to the forums
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